Today we got Steves brain tumour results back

[onlyjoking9329]

had a phone call from the hospital.
Steves tumour is grade 4.

Agree WT ? also, it may be the case that some if not all the models are passed through ?silently? IYSWIM?.He may not show is anger (especailly not to you or those around him - out of love and respect - plus anger is half the journey to acceptance and he's not ready for that just yet)
His baragning stage will alomost definitely be internal.

I dare say you?ve been through most if not all of the stages yourself by now, so hopefully you'll understand what I mean?

he has been angry mostly at me, but i know he doesn't mean it. he is not angry at the hospital for messing him around

Oh dear, I don?t think he is angry at YOU ? you?re just the one in the firing line because you?re there and I expect you?re the one who he sees as being the rational one and perhaps forcing him to face the reality? (pure speculation, I don?t know either of you), but I do know only too well the grieving stages having lost a mother, who was only as old as I am now, a husband who was only 40 and first born son who was still born.
My heart goes out to you ? I really don?t know how you deal with all this.

OJ just catching up with you as i have been away visting family. i was crossing everything for good results for you. i feel very sad for you all.
there must be something that we can all do for you. can i send you some goodies or some dosh for a trip out or just anything to make life seem a bit easier for you all?
please let me do something for you.

Thinking of you and Steve and your DC, OJ.

Valnben i can see you know a lot about the process, how awful for you to have had to deal with so many losses

Hi OJ just catching up. Agree with what everyone else says about the stages of grief, expect them to bounce about a bit... and for you too of course.

Have to pop out on the endless round of assessments but will read closer when i get back. Higs and you know where I am if there's anything I can do, even if its just some colouring books for the kids X

Just checking in to see how things are OJ- some very good advice and info from people already here- I can't add anything profound to that but just sending you best wishes and virtual chocolate.. a big box of those sea shell ones..

Hi Oj just popping in to see how your doing today. Poor Steve it must be so hard, i'm sure when he sees the consultant he might feel differently. However i suppose it is his decision and ultimately he could be right as he knows it isn't a cure and he needs to assess the benefits of having the treatment against how it is going to make him feel. He may be best sitting down and writing down any questions he has before making any decisions and then going through it all with the consultant. They will be very honest and open with you if you ask them to be.
Poor you this must be so hard trying to support him especially when he is thinking like this. As someone has said he changed his mind about telling his mum, it's all part of the rolercoaster for you all.

Thanks folks, i will be back on later to update

Robinpud, thanks for the lovely card and the very good article, it was good to read. steve can't read it very well as the print is small and his eyes not brill, i did offer to read it but he wants to read it himself in his own time.

peachy whats a Hig
i don't think its as good as my that went wrong!

Probably a hug LOL, but hey that's pretty good for me- only the one error!

Usually I manage [bush] on erm, womanly threads so a hg is nothing major LOL

Know what you mean about the kids with ASD hanging around, and I have only 2! You must be a bloody saint! I get enough grief from mine being laid up with 'morning' sickness.

Anyway will watch out for updates. And stop the mindless waffling.

How you doing? i really want to help you, i know i am a longtime lurker but i have been following your thread.
mumsnetters are great at rallying round to help people in difficult circs. i am sure lots of people will want to help you too.
xxx

morning sickness peachy, is there something i missed congrats to you. when are you due?

glitter, we are ok really, theres not much anyone can do for us other the invalueable listening ears.
thanks for your email.

Easter, so will have the boys at home- great timing huh? trying to give birth downstairs with the kids upstairs (nearest family i can leave them with are a 2 hour return journey away).

Could be interesting!

How's it going today?

send the boys over here peachy, i am sure they would fit in quite well
the girls were out today they went to mablethorpe with direct payment worker/TA so me and steve took DS to the tramway museum, steve was in a lot of pain today, thou he said he was glad he went, took lots of photos

Sounds like it was a good day on balance, though sad he's in pain.

Poor ds2 wouldn't know what to do with himself with your buncha s well- poor lad is almost at a disadvantage in our palce, being NT LOL!

Good that you have someone who can take the girls out, small mercies eh?

will be good when the kids are back at school thou steve starts his treatment 11am on 4th sept, the day the kids go back.

pity that you don't get the chance for any downtime before steve starts treatment. hope that once he sees the specialists for treatment they can help him more with the pain.

When are you away OJ is it next week ?
Poor Steve that he is in pain , hope the girls had a good day yesterday.

we are going away wednesday, we hope.
steve had a rough night with pain in his head and back.