Boil/abscess between breasts - large

[Becca19962014]

So I've had a boil for about ten days which over the last few days has got much worse. It's been growing and growing inward not outward because of the location. I spoke to an oncall GP who prescribed a days worth of antibiotics until I could see my GP today which I started yesterday as I was feeling seriously unwell (dizzy/sick/diabetes issues).

GP was very concerned because of location - it's literally between my breasts, I can't go without a bra as they're so big the skin between is very thin due to Ehlers danlos (EDS) rips open, and it's growing inward. They said to give it 3 days of antibiotics and go to hospital to get it "sorted out"

I am extremely phobic of hospitals/Drs/anyone medical even seeing GP is a massive problem. I had a panic attack at GP surgery and ended up locking myself in the toilet for ages sobbing in fear, eventually having to leave when staff came in to see if I was ok.

The only access I have in terms of mental health is the mindfulness group which made things worse, everything I tried to do to combat phobia has made it worse.

Is it likely to go away just with antibiotics? I can't have the ideal ones for it as I can't have penicillin so am on erithromycin. She was really worried but couldnt do anything in the surgery due to the location.

Local anaesthetic doesn't work with me at all due to my EDS so it'll have to be done without on top of having to actually go in without fainting (which I've not been able to do in ages) and I can't have any dressing on it due to the location as it just falls off because of my EDS.

Does anyone know about these things?

Are you specifically in touch with the support group that I posted about? It’s a charity and according to their website it’s the only support group to offer a telephone helpline The helpline (0800 907 8518) is open 09:00 – 17:00 on Tuesdays and Fridays. www.ehlers-danlos.org/support/helpline/

Re you not wanting your family to visit you ect in hospital you need to speak to the hospitals PALS team as it’s a safe guarding issue if they are abusive to you and hospital staff are contacting them and letting them visit you in hospital.

I’m aware that you have health issues and things have happened to you in the past with healthcare/social care professionals and your family, however you really need to seek some kind of help to start looking after/caring for your self properly as things are just going to get worse. Do you have any friends that you trust who could help you attend hospital/the drs ect? Are social services still involved? you sound very vulnerable but please try and understand that not everyone is out to manipulate or harm you. The dentist was probably trying to be friendly, he can’t assess what’s wrong with your teeth if he can’t look inside your mouth. Re money/your disabilities and paying for care I appreciate that you are struggling financially and you say that you need to make a contribution for any care that you receive that’s why I suggested the support group so you can speak to them to see if there’s anything they can suggest to help you.

Re your mental health I think you need to be referred on for specialist help rather than CBT ect, you’re not coping or looking after yourself properly. If you’ve not been referred by your GP speak to the practice manager or failing that PALS at the hospital.

Please go to a&e, people aren’t going to needlessly die because you’ve gone there. They triage patients and prioritise the emergencies. Your abscess needs looking at as it could turn into sepsis and you could become very unwell very quickly.

Realistically with all your health problems it’s only going to get worse as you get older if you don’t get the treatment you need.

Living rurally is compounding all of this. Would you be able to consider moving to where there are more facilities and treatment options?

Bathe it with salt water, Savlon and dress it and monitor it.

Yes im touch with them. All they did was tell me to see consultant in England. I'm unable to travel anywhere so it was useless. They didn't even know the condition when it effects the neck kills - they told me to get tested for allergies.

Social services still see me but they're just doing so to trick advocate (who is based hours away) into thinking they give a shit and are helping. Reality is I reached out for help, making myself vulnerable and ended up sat in a room being told how I wasn't good enough for them by their manager and how they were always slagging me off behind my back. So much for taking as long as necessary to build trust and help which they told advocate. All they do is bully me to do mindfulness crap and try harder.

Re dentist. I'm not going to allow a man near my mouth. They promised me a woman and then after owned up to not employing one so tricked me. Flirting with a rape victim, any rape victim, and calling them love and smiling all the time is never going to do anything but scare them.

I'm not going to move. This is my home. I can't bear the thought of leaving. My combination of rare conditions aren't treatable anywhere else. Living anywhere else will mean less going out not more as more expensive. And no more understanding GP who actually has tried. Just left to rot. Everywhere expects people to have family and friends to help, the NHS simply doesn't do multiple needs. I been under specialists in London and it was the same thing there - just passed on all the time. I've no friends or family or anyone who can be a guarantor I can't even afford to move locally. When landlord wants their home back I'll be back on the street. Social services told me I need to "save" for when that happens. Wont make a difference, no guarantor, no home.

Friends don't last when you're too ill to do anything. They get bored and have stupid expectations like if someone has made an attempt on their life they'll be helped and put into hospital and the reality is that doesn't happen. All I can do is get food/meds nothing else. I've not been more than half a mile from my door in years due to lack of functioning and money. At least it's nice and pretty here. I can't cope living in cities or built up places.

I don't qualify for mental health services. I cannot take meds so don't qualify. It's the same everywhere. And it's not that I'd didn't try. I did just ended up with even more seizures than I have now - combination of conditions meant that was the case.

Severe depression, anxiety and PTSD without meds is hell never mind with the extra medical needs on top. I don't qualify for mental health care not even assessment. I complained they argued social services say no concerns I'm fine and yes I've told them about my needs.

A&E told me people died because of people like me taking up services. That's why I never go. I should go for things like self harm, my GP wants me to, but when I did they complained I was wasting their time and resources and shouldn't be bothering them.

My godmother I was very close to killed herself because services were wasting time on me. I know that because the manager told me in a meeting days before Christmas. And she deserved help so much more than me. I'm still in everyone's way and she's dead. I'm never going to forget that. She tried to pretend she hadn't meant it but she did. So triage is a load of rubbish obviously here at least.

My godmother I was very close to killed herself because services were wasting time on me

That isn't true by any stretch of the imagination.

Let's hope it clears up by itself

The manager was clear it was true - if I'm being helped those in genuine distress are not and her example was "the woman" who died on the day I was being seen by social worker. That she needed help and couldn't be helped because I was blocking it.

I already had worked it out anyway. But to know others have as well is just awful.

Anyway have put some more stuff on boil and it has another head on it with another oozing so going to leave it this afternoon. It's boiling hot here anyway and I wouldn't get a taxi.

Have spent all morning crying and sobbing between complaining on here. This is when I should phone for help but too afraid to.

You really don’t seem very well op.

Please ring your gp. You need some medical attention

Please ring your GP. You don't sound well at all.

Oozing and heads are good- carry on keeping it as clean as possible, taking the ABs etc.

For the rest, you've been let down multiple times, but you know that. Hang in there, doing your best. You never know when someone with influence may step up and sort things out.

I don’t understand why you can’t access mental health services, you definitely need some support you have PTSD and self harm, i’d speak to MIND www.mind.org.uk/information-support/helplines/

You are also not responsible for your God Mother’s death! It’s the health and social care system that let people down, NOT you!

Rang GP told to phone mh team who told me I as too upset and distressed to go to a&e and kept going on about needing support worker. They're never going to understand.

They don't want me going to a&e because a&e would phone them and I'm not good enough for them.

MH services are for those who have mental illness not people like me. I'm not ill.

The manager was clear it was true - if I'm being helped those in genuine distress are not and her example was "the woman" who died on the day I was being seen by social worker. That she needed help and couldn't be helped because I was blocking it.

If this is what the manager said to you, and I'm not doubting that it is, then the manager is entirely wrong, wholly unprofessional and in the wrong job! You are not responsible for another person's actions!

One more thing, you have a phobia that is classified as life-threatening. According to DSM-V you certainly do have a mental disorder, phobias are listed as a sub-section of an anxiety disorder (and mindfulness is NOT the recommended treatment plan!).

You have been horribly let down by too many people, I hope your current issue (the boil) resolves without further stress or distress.

They say phobia = little anxiety.

They've no idea.

Phone call just confirmed this is hopeless.

Feel broken. And very, very stupid.

1. I'm not surprised you feel broken, you have been, and continue to be, failed by so many people.

1. You are not stupid, you are very unwell (and that's without the current boil).

Anyone who thinks phobia = 'little anxiety' needs to do some reading (or meet my son who had a phobia-induced panic attack so severe he had to be hospitalised to get it under control - I was able to pay for him to be treated but many are not in that position).

What would you like the GP to do? Can you ring the MH team? They can't help if you don't tell them you need help. You sound like my dad when he needs help,he is convinced of the outcome before actually ringing the GP or hospital and is usually surprised when there's a different outcome to the one he imagined.

I know it's hard

You are definitely not stupid I agree.

You do have mental health issues! You have PTSD, self harm and from your posts it sounds like you suffer from low mood. You are also not looking after yourself properly (not washing and won’t attend a&e even though your GP/Practice nurse have told you to so) and you’re not engaging with health and social care professionals which is a sign of PTSD and anxiety.

You need referring to your community mental health team to help you manage your mental health, and it’s no surprise you have these issues due to your health and the things that have happened to you over the years. You mentioned that CBT/talking therapies don’t help you, but have you given them time to work? I’m aware that you have complex health issues that cause you a lot of pain which makes it difficult for you to care for yourself and there’s an issue with your finances that prevents you accessing care to support you, that’s why I suggested the helplines to check if there’s any grants or something you can access so you can improve your quality of life.

Please try contacting them again along with the MIND helpline.

Also you’ve mentioned an ‘advocate’ who is this? Is it a friend or a health/social care professional?

I’m sorry that you’ve had issues in the past when you’ve tried to engage/access services, however not everyone is the same. You didn’t cause your God Mother’s death, your not causing people at A&E to die and those healthcare/social care professionals shouldn’t be suggesting such a thing. I’m wondering if there’s more to it and people are trying/tried to help however you won’t/can’t accept their help because of your issues with PTSD/anxiety and general mental health.

I've done years of therapy.

There's no grants available. Just told to apply for PIP and DLA.

The help they are offering is mindfulness. That is it. My conditions are not recognised by them as anything other than choices. E.g. Not getting boiled drained is considered a rational choice. Having panic attack is down to me not doing mindfulness properly or taking meds.

But they don't say these things to others.

The man who has stalked me for years and assulted me and threatened rape can do so due to his "mental illness" meaning he doesn't know boundaries. Yet knows boundaries with other people. Both police and women's aid have told me they don't believe he doesn't know what he is doing. Mental health team believe him.

The woman who has been abusive verbally to me for years did so at work and got reported and lost her job. Until mental health team stepped in and supported her back into work. Now she spits at me. Again police don't believe she doesn't know what she's doing.

I'm supposed to believe these people don't choose to target me because I had no visitors and staff were dismissive of my needs when in hospital.

The advocate was employed by mental health team to manage me out of the department.

They've not told her that though.