Cancer Support Thread #71 - here to help if you’re dealing with cancer in any shape or form, come in and say hello.

[Brassica]

Hi again everyone and welcome to the 71st new thread for cancer support.

All those who are currently being treated, have been treated in the past, have worries and concerns and/or are having tests are very welcome to pull up a chair and chat, vent, rant, pour hearts out, share milestones and anything else! We are a very friendly and all-too experienced bunch on here and there are no questions too small or silly to ask.

Our previous thread is here .

Anyone with any type of cancer (female or male) is welcome. And we will hold your hand if you're waiting to find out whether or not you have cancer at all.

If you've got a loved one with cancer then your best place for support is probably on the Life-Limiting Illness board.

Please can I invite current members to reintroduce yourselves below for latest situations and stories so far.

Hi there Feeling. I can only imagine how terrifying this must be for you and DH. How old is he? Has he had symptoms of anything being wrong? It would surely help to talk to people in real life too about this scare so they can help support you. Just preparing the ground if it turns out to be needed.

Maybe you could also ring Macmillan and ask to talk to someone there to give you some idea of what to expect at your DH’s appointment.

Everyone on here will agree, the waiting and not knowing is a terrible thing. Your mind will run away with you and imagine all sorts. Once you know what you are dealing with, the plan will come together and make you feel a bit more secure and looked after. But I hope very much that in this case it turns out to be something benign.

Take it easy and get lots of cuddles from your little boy Good luck.

Sorry you find yourself here feeling. Waiting is the worst, you feel so helpless. I hope you will be posting soon talking about a scare. As the others have said try and find someone to talk to in rl, xxx

Brassica I will PM you about a FB group when I can get onto my laptop, I don't seem to be able to do it on my iPad (doesn't mean it can't be done 😁). I actually shared the news of my diagnosis via FB, a lot of my closest friends are in the UK and we are in Aus so it seemed easiest. There was also a limit to how many phone conversations I felt up to. My FB settings are really tight and nobody from work is on there so I wasn't worried about people seeing it who shouldn't, if anything it has been useful as word got round and I got some lovely supportive messages and offers of support with minimal intrusion.

Hi feeling.
I have now been waiting for five weeks (four since diagnosis confirmed), during which time I have had scans etc. My first appointment with the oncologist is tomorrow, and I'm very anxious but desperate to know the plan and to get on with it.
I know that paralysing fear really well, believe me. Some days I feel relatively calm, and other days I am so jittery that i can barely function. If I knew a way to manipulate my surroundings and feelings to achieve the calmer state I would, but I can't.
If your DH does receive a cancer diagnosis I hope that plans come together quickly for him, but in the meantime the best advice I received (from here -no one else knows) was to distract myself as much as possible and stay away from Google.
Hoping for the best for you, and for all others on here (especially TQ)

feeling

In the nicest possible way, this thread is not right for you. It’s a thread for those who have cancer themselves or are being tested themselves.

Most of us have no experience whatsoever of worrying for or caring for someone else (I think there are other threads where people walking that path congregate)

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/life_limiting_illness/2424732-A-thread-for-those-supporting-relatives-with-life-limiting-diseases

Feeling -sorry to hear about your dh and hope he gets good news rather than cancer.

As Iv said, it's very different to go through it yourself than worry someone else - and all of us here are the ones people worry about!

You may get more support starting your own thread, as I'm sure there are lots of people out there in your situation. Good luck and all the best.

Thinking of TQ and her daughters.

Thank you all. First chance I've had to post again as DH is putting the LO to bed.

My DH is 36, fit, healthy until recent niggles caused a referral for scan for possible gallbladder infection where the lumps have been picked up. It wasn't a gallbladder infection but I will be forever grateful to that Doctor who have him such a thorough examination and referred him.

Sorry if this isn't the best thread to discuss this on. I was too wobbly when I posted this morning to realise.

Thanks @Brassica am trying to keep up but being crap sorry

Feeling so sorry to hear about your dh. Hope you find the support you need

Thinking about TQ

TQ has an update on her thread

Oh dear, it doesn’t sound like TQ is getting the peace and privacy she deserves and needs. If you’re reading dear TQ we are all thinking about you and you have been phenomenal, I so hope things improve x

Good luck for tomorrow redspook, I hope you come away with information, answers and a plan to hang your hat on.

Love and thoughts with TQ, so crappy to be in a noisy unpleasant ward. I hope the hospice move can be organised somehow x

Hello! I am new. Am 35 years old with two kids 8 and 5. Was diagnosed with thyroid cancer in my 20s with extensive lymph node involvement. Many years later have been referred for an urgent scan as I found a hard lump in my neck, dang, just before school holidays as well.

Hi Notcool1984. I'm off to bed, but didn't want to read & run.

So sorry you have this to deal with, after having been through the mill once. Fingers crossed it's a cist

Hi notcool, I'm also hoping that your lump is nothing serious.
Thanks for your good wishes brassica, my appointment is at 12. I'll update later.

Thinking of you redspook and hope the appt is going ok xx

Can anyone direct me to TQ's thread please?

I'm not feeling sick today and it's flippin marvellous!

TQ's Thread

Thank you lilies

I'm back, and trying to process the information.
I have a "bulky" tumour (5cm) between he very top of my cervix and my uterus. The PET scan showed activity in an abdominal lymph node higher in my abdomen, but nothing anywhere else.
I wasn't expecting to receive any information about outcomes, and of course there are no guarantees. However, the consultant said very clearly that they are looking to cure it.
We then had the treatment explained in more detail - I already knew I was headed for chemoradiotherapy, but it's now been confirmed as 5 weeks of radio every weekday and chemo (cisplatin) once a week. After that, I will have four sessions of brachytherapy. He didn't explain a lot about that at this stage, as it sounds brutal. However, he said that brachytherapy is the treatment which has made the biggest difference to outcomes in recent years.
I should have a planning scan towards the end of next week, and with luck start the treatment during the week beginning 15th July.
I have a reasonable chance of coming through this, and if I do I will consider myself very lucky.
Thanks to all for your support, I'll keep posting.

for you redspook. I don't any experience with this type of treatment, but didn't want to read and run.

Try and do something nice for yourself today, & keep staying away from Google

Blimey redspook, that is a lot of information to process and quite a different course of treatment from what I’m in for so sorry not to be able to reassure or add much but how do you feel it went? Do you have confidence in the team and feel comfortable with them? It will no doubt take you some time to absorb what they’re telling you but I guess it must feel a bit more reassuring to have had this appointment and see the wheels begin to swing into motion.

Take it easy over the next few days. Hope you feel ok

Hello, I'm new. I got diagnosed with anal cancer yesterday. I had a colostomy 10 days ago and it's all been very shocking and I'mfinding it very hard to come to terms with. I'm 49 and have 3 teenagers.

Long time lurker, as they say. Ovarian and endometrial cancers diagnosed last year. Hysterectomy, chemo and radiotherapy.

I just registered for the first time as I wanted to offer redspook some reassurance about brachytherapy. I know there are different types and some involve overnight stays, but if it's the same as me then I had the planning scan and then 2 treatments and didn't have to stay in.

The thought of it was so much worse than the actual thing. It sounds hideous but I didn't find it painful, at worst a tiny bit uncomfortable at first. I took some precautionary paracetamol - as one Dr said "it's not dignified", but I gave up on that a long while ago anyway! They didn't really talk about it far in advance while I was having external radiotherapy which made it seem more scary, but it was totally fine and mine was very quick. And as you say, very good outcomes. Feel free to ask any questions.

Very best wishes to TQ, her posts have kept me reassured and reading over the last year.

Thanks all, I'm still trying to put my thoughts in order. Thanks for your experience Ignatius - thee consultant did say I would have to stay in overnight twice so it sounds a bit different from yours. I will just deal with it when the time comes - I haven't any choice.
Sorry to see you here porolli, but welcome. Was cancer suspected when you had your surgery, or has the diagnosis come as a complete shock? Wise women on here told me that I would feel calmer when I had a plan, and I've got to that stage today so I hope it will be easier to deal with from now on. I hope for the same for you too, and that you won't have to wait long.
Love as always to TQ.