New year, new thread - cancer support thread 68 - join us if you have cancer, or are waiting for cancer-related tests

[WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo]

Hello everyone,

Welcome to the new thread. Our previous one is here.

Anyone with any cancer is welcome, or anyone waiting for tests because they might have cancer. If you're new, just jump in wherever. Don't feel you need to catch up with previous posts. We talk a lot! Ask any questions you need to. Someone will hopefully have an answer. And feel free to post photos of cute pets too.

Whether you're new or not, it's helpful to post a little introduction on the new thread to save people trying to remember everyone's different diagnosis and treatment.

baba step away from the statistics. People are not statistics, and you don’t know that anything at all is the matter with your lymph nodes. Mine get achy when I have a cold. I know how easy it is to catastrophise, and my prognosis is dire so I know the temptation to google the shit out of it, but honestly nothing is hopeless.

Baba before my diagnosis, Google had me convinced that I had weeks left. The particular lymph node of mine that was swollen is usually only ever swollen in stage 4 stomach/pancreatic/lung cancer. But that wasn't actually true! Waiting for results is a special kind of hell, and actually getting a cancer diagnosis was nothing compared to the torture I put myself through while waiting. It's tough, but try not to think about it - make yourself busy and be kind to yourself and don't look any further than the next appointment/thing to do. XXX

Baba Apart from the fantastic support I’ve had on here the things that have got me through so far have been.

1). Refusing to google anything to do with cancer
2). Just trying to think ahead to the next appointment and no further.

This is obviously hard to do at the start but I wish I had known these things at the beginning

Tahiti I hope you get to home very soon! That sounds like a much better treatment plan
Purple will keep everything crossed for you ref the trial. Has your blanket turned up yet?

KeepCalm - sorry about your DH's interview. How are you getting on ref the business? Could it be run as a collective?

Can't remember who else's DH didn't get the promotion, but sympathies to you too.

I struggled in the snow yesterday. It was so beautiful we went out for a walk on the common but I simply couldn't manage walking in 6" of snow for long at all. It made me realise how weak I'm becoming.

Oh Babay please don't think the worst as it's likely to be something completely innocent. Have you spoken to your DP about how worried you are?

Toofar I'm not surprised you're so frustrated. Any word on how long you're in hospital for? I hope you have plenty of distractions to keep you occupied

Thanks wombat, I hope you're doing ok

I haven't dared venture out TQ as I know I wouldn't get far as I know how weak I am. It's so frustrating and I know doing more exercise would possibly help but I'm too weak to do any. My blanket should be here by the 5th

@Babbayagga
Many of us on here have a confirmed terminal cancer diagnosis but I think you're still waiting for a dx that is more likely to be ulcerative colitis or crohns than bowel cancer? I think you're getting a bit ahead of yourself by posting "I'm not long for this world." and "Goodbye cruel world"....

Step away from Google and take it one step at a time. If it is bowel cancer there are many, many treatment options.

I'm mostly checking to see if there's any news yet from iVampire I hope you solved your clothing conundrum. They ought to provide blankets beforehand so that you can stay cosy until you're ready to set off.

KeepCalm I hope you had a nice time with your cousin Soup is just the thing in this weather :)

shiningstar thank you. I am really sorry about your brother that's shit. I am glad that this thread was able to help a bit.

purple are there exams or coursework as part of the apprenticeship? If so, he might get special consideration because of your illness. It's just bloody unfair that he might need to

Namechange I hope your cat is home now. Do she and the dog get along well?

Ouch Toofar! That sounds terribly uncomfortable. Hopefully they will be able to remove the catheter soon. Could you ask someone to show you how to unplug yourself so that you can be more independent? Yay for hairwash - it makes such a difference :)

My iPad is starting to get a bit grumpy so I will post this first bit and then carry on in a new post...

Hiiiiii Leslie

Lovely to hear from you. You always feel like a smiley friend dropping in for cake and coffee.

Namechange I hope your cat is home now. Do she and the dog get along well?

Yes she is home, and no they don’t! Just call me the UN...

That's lovely about your doggy Namechange :)

Woah! Hold your horses babayagga. There could be all sorts of explanations. Did the consultant offer any opinion on what they thought was causing your symptoms? Step away from Google and whatever stats you are torturing yourself with, and try to bring yourself back into the present moment for now it might be worth asking your GP for something to help with the anxiety while you're waiting for the results.

TQ it really sucks when something is more difficult and you realise you're getting weaker. Bloody cancer. I hope you managed to enjoy your walk despite that.

purple do you have access to any physio services? It might be something your Macmillan nurse can advise about. My local hospice Does group physio sessions. That might help to build you strength back up a bit. It's so easy to lose and practically impossible to get back

I cross-posted Namechange. I meant the story about how you got him. Not about them fighting.

and for you.

leslie figured, though they are quite amusing with their disgust for each other so it’s not without it’s upsides. They like to share nice warm spots but won’t look at each other. I think me and my sister did the same thing when we were squashed in the back of the car on long journeys.

How has your Sunday been?

I'm so pleased to see posts from you Leslie, I start getting a bit twitchy if you don't post for a while

Yes my son has coursework and he gets it done pretty much straight away although I guess that will change if I have to tell him I'm dying so I'll find out about him getting a bit of extra time if his mind isn't on it

I have no idea about physio, I'm just trying to walk upstairs and back down without having to have a lie down on my bed when I get to the top My Macmillan nurse is trying to organise a scan with my oncologist who is a nightmare to get hold of as my leg pain could be caused by a slipped disc, hopefully it's anything but the cancer

Another lurker here. Like @myguidejools I noticed this thread when my dad was diagnosed with mesothelioma (asbestos induced cancer) as some kind of way of trying to see how cancer feels from the patient’s viewpoint, and was immediately struck by Leslies warmth and kindness - and if that lovelyness can be seen here, I can only imagine how lovely you must be in real life. Obviously I don’t know you. You might come across very well online and be a right a-hole IRL (doubt it!)... but I hope you don’t mind another soppy stranger on the internet popping by to say how special you seem.

Dad died last May and his last few weeks, though difficult, were also incredibly special. I hope there are some special moments for you too Leslie. I learnt that love carries on regardless of whatever the hell bastarding cancer decides to do. I expect there will always be a lot of love for you and from what I see on here, it’s well bloody deserved. Obvs I don’t know what other things you’ve done/achieved in your life but you can be proud of what you’ve done for people here.

I hope you Leslie (and everyone else on here) feel love when you need it the most.

@purpleunicorns your son's college can apply for special consideration. It's not very much though. My son got 2% when I had the BC. I think in your case it might go up to about 3%. The max is 5%. It's a bit measley to be honest. For exams he could have rest breaks but He won't be entitled to extra time ( guess what I do for a living😄😄😄). I am not sure if it is possible to extend the Btec deadlines as my school doesn't do those so am not very knowledgeable about that.

Waves at everyone. @WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo More gentle hugs. You are an inspirational lady.

I've been at school today helping supervise rehearsals. Bit knackered but seen my very nervy ( think skitish thoroughbred horse) pupil drumming like a rock star. She really was impressive. Six hours of dealing with constant requests for the loo was worth it to see that.

Hi Leslie Tahiti KeepCalm Namechange (yes I’m nuts) Toofar (and indeed all of you who have been interested in my antics)

The run went brilliantly - huge event, well organised, and just brilliant to run (roads closed) right through the middle of London.

They had a bit of speechifying at the start, asking for hands up for anyone who knew anyone touched by cancer (nearly everyone), then keep hands up if it was you (a fair few) then keep up if still being treated (a very few, and a spontaneous round of applause for us - and do remember I was running for all you ‘orrible lot, so that was several thousand people saying you’re fab at about 9:20 this morning).

Nice feel to the run, they had people dressed up as huskies for runners to high five for energy (with ‘who let the dogs out’ chorus on loop repeat, which must have really pissed off anyone living/working nearby), also penguins, and polar bears to cuddle at the end, plus buskers and a rick choir. Plus music at the end.

I got my clothes sorted out. I wore single layer to run, but wrapped myself old manky ripped cardie (that has been waiting to go in charity rag bag) until in start pen with minutes to go. Then dumped it over the railings (CRUK collecting all discarded items, putting stuff in good nick in the shops and selling the manky by weight),

The event went well. There were loads of ability levels there - and plenty in fancy dress. I ran a new personal best.

Very tired this evening! I’ll write a less self-centred post soon.

I'm another lurker and v. occasional poster. I'm in long-term monitoring for something ovarian which might come back as cancer.

Just wanted to say how sad I am to hear about MAS. I remember the Tamoxigang, when Leslie was Ruby, and the gentle way MAS moulded the group from a lot of v different personalities into a powerful entity of its own. She liked Breton tops and mindfulness - it was the first time I'd heard of it. She posted on here a couple of years ago and I replied to thank her for 'the best thing on Mumsnest'. I think from the timing it must have been a goodbye.

So glad you stayed on and took her place, Leslie. A difficult act to follow and you've done brilliantly. I can only echo what everyone else has said. You've made, are making, more of a difference than you'll ever know.

to everyone else, especially TQ and Purple.

well done on your new PB iVampire

You've done us lacies proud. It sounds like a great event. What a great idea to collect and sell the clothing.

Flyingarcher how lovely to read about your proud teacher moment. Your pupils are lucky to have someone who cares so much :)

BonApp well, actually I have been a bit of an a-hole today... I'm really sorry about your dad I'm glad you were able to find comfort in his final weeks.

Waving to everyone

I am quite grumpy as we had some guests who stayed for much longer than expected, despite having been told they could pop in for half an hour their visit overlapped with some guests I actually wanted to see, so I didn't get as much time with them. Plus they are such miserable people and it was as though they were deliberately trying to be as negative as possible. They even found something bad to say about wheat bags FFS

Who can be offended by wheat bags?

Well, quite.

Sometimes the wheat bits all move to one end (shake it then?!).

It's my wheat bag anyway and I was using it on myself.

Hold on. Someone had a go at you for using wheat bags on yourself? Like that's anyone's business? Ffs.

I'm sorry you've been grumpy Leslie. Hoping for a happier day tomorrow x

I have met Leslie IRL and confirm that she is indeed a right royal PITA That's a joke btw! Lighthearted! And all that other MN stuff. Of course she is even more lovely in the flesh than she is online and I will forever treasure my name badge she made for me for the Hugathon (that's a knitting and crocheting meetup in case you're wondering).

I am laughing at the wheat bag drama. Was it the wrong colour too?

Waving right back at ya Thymeout

iVampire Well done on your PB! I ran the ASICS 10k some years ago and the crowds were amazing. It was an incredible experience. Thank you for waving the flag for us all.

Well, she wasn't having a go. Just saying negative things about wheat bags. Their idea of conversation seems to be to choose a topic and then say negative things about it

@WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo I'm currently looking at 4 wheat bags in my bed, that would sort your visitors off. Shall I send them next time they'd like to visit, or give them my address, pretend your here and I'll bombard them with wheat bags!
@iVampire run sounds amazing. After I've had my appointment on Tuesday and I know what other treatment I may or not need exercise is ok the agenda! I may need to look into that run next year!
@Namechangeforthiscancershit And @KeepCalm Canines too cute! I've got felines and if they don't bring me presents in the early hours, scrapping with other cats at 5am are to be found in my bed at lunchtime when I need a nap!
@WhatWouldLeslieKnopeDo You'll be pleased to know, I think, that I've introduced by DD to scrabble today! I really want to play cluedo with her but need more players as I need to play with her the first time if that makes sense.
Hope everyone has a restful evening

Leslie “choose a topic and then say negative things about it”

I see you’ve met my mother-in-law

ivampire the whole run event sounds fantastic! One of my friends was there today as well, she looked frozen at the start, bless her! Congratulations on your PB and well done for representing the lacies

Leslie your visitors today sound like soul sucking joy thiefs! They also sound like my family (that I don't talk to anymore, because of the soul sucking) so I know how exhausting people like that are. Miserable bastards. Hope you have much lovelier visitors in future!

Purple hope they get to the bottom of your leg pain asap and it's something easily sorted. XXX

It's very nice to be home. My 4 year old was so happy, and kept saying "happy mamma home day!" And my dog wouldn't leave my side. She was miserable when she had to go for a walk, had to be carried out the front door, bless her!
Hope everyone had a restful night XXX