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Original poster

My friend has just been diagnosed with breast cancer and she is 33 weeks pregnant

38 replies

Miaou · 21/06/2007 19:15

I've only met her twice (just moved to the area) but we really hit it off straightaway. Today she told me that she has just found out she has breast cancer . This is her first child too (and I guess probably her last). The experts haven't decided what to do yet but they are having a multi-disciplinary meeting next week to decide on the best course of action (I guess both cancer specialists and obstetricians).

I'm going to see her on Monday but I'd love to be able to tell her some positive stories about women in her position or who have been through this.

OP posts:
Original poster
Miaou · 21/06/2007 19:23

bump

OP posts:
jinxed · 21/06/2007 19:25

oh sweetie i am sorry. No advice im afraid, but i really hope all works out for the best.

HOpe all going well up in Thurso, if you bump into my grandparents say hello for me xx

jinxed · 21/06/2007 19:25

tis jarm btw xxx

Original poster
Miaou · 21/06/2007 19:27

hello lovely, do you ever get up this way? Would love to meet up.

My hormones are in overdrive - I just can't stop thinking about it. I'm devastated for her.

OP posts:
nickytwotimes · 21/06/2007 19:28

how awful, miaou.
a lady i used to work with had cervical cancer diagnosed at her 6 wk check after dc1. she was quite poorly but did make a full recovery and was even back at work within the year! it was her only child, but she is so grateful she got him before he cancer had appeared.
i really hope your friend's cancer has been caught early and she will be able to get well.

jinxed · 21/06/2007 19:29

havent been up for a long time mate, not since we scattered mums ashes on dunnet beach in 2004.

Hoping to get up within the year though, my grandad is poorly bless him.

Hope all ok up there, miss it terribly!

Original poster
Miaou · 21/06/2007 19:31

It's beautiful and we're loving it here, jinxed

Do let me know if you ever make it this far north!

Nicky, thanks for your thoughts - the fact that she is still pregnant is a real complicating factor as far as I can see.

OP posts:
donnie · 21/06/2007 19:33

no real ideas but I really feel for your friedn. Hope she is ok.

Original poster
Miaou · 21/06/2007 19:34

I guess it's quite unusual, donnie, tbh - I just thought that with MN being the size it is these days someone else might have been through this. Shall keep bumping this thread over the next few days.

OP posts:
binkleandflip · 21/06/2007 19:35

I suspect they might let her get to 36/37 weeks then deliver the baby and get straight on with treatment. It's horrible, my mum has had a mastectomy but the blessing is that she is so far on in the pregnancy.

donnie · 21/06/2007 19:40

the general consensus is that treatment and recovery prospects are loads better now than even a couple of years ago, but I guess any chemo/radiotherapy is out of the question while your friend is pg. As binkle says they may well induce a couple of weeks early which isn' t so bad, but of course dealing with radio/chemo with a newborn would be hellish. Hope she has a supportive partner. You sound like a good friend to her.

donnie · 21/06/2007 19:41

yes good idea to keep bumping - lots of people ( like me ) are frequently away for a few days!

Original poster
Miaou · 21/06/2007 19:44

I hope I can be, donnie - she's lovely

I think they are considering operating whilst she is still pregnant - all up in the air atm.

I've just done a search on the archives and have come across a few people who have been through this - some positive stories about conceiving post-cancer too

OP posts:
snowleopard · 21/06/2007 19:45

I have an old colleague who was diagnosed with cancer while pg - not breast cancer but lymphoma, but they both have a good recovery rate. The baby was induced early and was fine and she made a full recovery.

Also I really don't mean this to sound shallow at all but Ruth on the Archers had another baby after recovering from breast cancer. I do know she's not real. but I also know they check all the storylines and have medical advisors etc., which suggests it does happen.

Lots of good luck to your friend for a full and fast recovery!

StinkyPete · 21/06/2007 19:46

a relative of mine had a v similar situation. she was diagnosed with breast ca when pg. had an early planned c section. baby was absolutely fine - what you have to remember about babies born premature due to mum's health is that there's nothing 'wrong' with them, they're just early. mum was allowed to bf for 1 week, then started chemotherapy. dad did all the hands on care for first weeks while mum was quite poorly with side effects. they were told that the strength of the medicine she had taken would prevent them having any further children (this was their first too). However, it's now 3+ years on. their dd is 3.5 and they also have a 'miracle' dd who;s 1.5!!!

i also have a friend who was diagnosed with a brain tumour when pg. same as my relative her oncologist and genae met together to advise them . she had ds early and started therapies. she has been advised not to be pg again as this would prob make the tumour regrow and she fully intends following that advice.

Please pass on these positive stories from me. i think sometimes ca in pg can be hormone related and once the person isn't pg anymore, they can have very positive results.

donnie · 21/06/2007 19:47

I can't imagine how hard it must be for her. Some people have such incredible problems to cope with. Makes me feel ashamed of my petty moans actually!

Would they do a mastectomy?

StinkyPete · 21/06/2007 19:58

relative was given a date for her mastectomy, but when it came to the time her tumour had gone by therapies alone, so she didn't need the op.

bozza · 21/06/2007 20:14

Miaou I have a positive story. It is about my friend who I met when our DDs were babies. My DD was born in May and her DD should have been too, but she was delivered at 33 weeks because her Mum was diagnosed with cancer. So that was really hard for them all because the DD was in special care and the Mum was having chemo etc, scans/x-rays etc started on the very day her daughter was born. So when I first met her she had no hair and was wearing a baseball cap (she is sporty though).

Anyway our DDs are now 3, and her DD is a lovely little girl who enjoys dancing, swimming and horseriding (see what I meant about being sporty). But what is more, she has a 1yo little sister. And even more amazing, the little one was breast fed on one side only for a year. The older one obviously couldn't be because the chemo was going on.

bozza · 21/06/2007 20:16

stinkypete same story. Could we be talking about the same person? I think you are from near me.

Ceolas · 21/06/2007 20:18

Oh that's awful news Miaou.

Really hope for a positive outcome. Thinking of you both xxx

LaDiDaDi · 21/06/2007 20:21

I think that they will probsbly deliver the lo asap as 33 weeks is a reasonable gestation, my dd was 32 weeks, you wouldn't expect the babe to have any problems longterm from being born at that gestation.

Best wishes for your friend.

Original poster
Miaou · 21/06/2007 21:00

Thanks everyone for the positive stories - bozza I was hoping you might see this as I found your story in the archives earlier . Stinkypete - good advice re. the early baby thing - I was thinking the same thing myself!

Fortunately we have good cancer support networks round here.

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bozza · 21/06/2007 22:04

One of the things my friends found useful was having cooked meals dropped off. Apparently one of the neighbours did it, although I suppose people that are actually on chemo might not have much of an appetite, but for her DH and between times etc. And maybe, if the baby is likely to be born early you could get knitting tiny cardigans and hats.

StinkyPete · 21/06/2007 22:38

bozza, it's not the same person - dd not a May birthday. But the fact that it's a repeated story is encouraging for Miaou's friend.
Where are you?

ronshar · 21/06/2007 22:49

Sorry to butt in but I remember reading in the either the Saturday Times or Sunday Times not that long ago about a lady who was given full CA treatment while pregnant. If I remember correctly the oncologist was in Liverpool. Baby was term and perfect at the end of the pregnancy.
If you do a search through the Times website you may find it. It was a lovely positive story about how different medical teams cooperated to get the best result for the patient.
If this helps great if turns out not to be then sorry for wasting your time.

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