CANCER SUPPORT THREAD 66 for those with cancer or awaiting cancer test results. Rant, rave, laugh, cry, joke, scream - whatever gets you through the day.

[TwitterQueen1]

Welcome to the new thread, and the club that nobody wants to join. Our previous thread is here

Anyone with any type of cancer is welcome. And we will hold your hand if you're waiting to find out whether or not you have cancer at all.

If you have a loved one with cancer you can get support on a different thread here

For old and new posters it's very helpful if you (re)introduce yourself in your first post with a summary of your diagnosis (chemo brain is a real thing and my memory isn't what it used to be!).

BitOfFun I haven't seen you for an absolute age Congrats on the wedding! So sorry to hear your news and see you on this thread though. What a total shitter

FWIW I lurk on this thread as I had a scare earlier this year when the dr said I had sarcoma. Had a rough September of just about coping, consultants appts, ultra sound MRI etc and then thankfully was told I had a large deep seated lipoma which will come out next January.

Anyway, although my news was positive I walked the line and can only imagine what you are all going through.

Lots of love to you all and in particular to BOF who I have known for the last 14 MN years at least

@BitOfFun shoes

On Saturday early morning news from house of KC, I managed not to shit myself overnight!!!

I still feel like I have a red hot javelin shoved up my arse and I've lost 10lbs since Monday BUT I slept 5hrs in a row without running to the lav.

I am taking that as a positive

Family visit today may tip me over the edge but will deal with that later.

keepcalm is it bad that I am following the progress of your arse with more interest than the brexit negotiations?

In that case @Namechangeforthiscancershit let me just tell you I have managed a fart.

A fart people. A small step for many but after this week I don't think I've ever been so proud of myself

Oh my goodness ladies. I'm chuckling so much this morning!

Now then the question is dare you fart? I got to the stage when I thought a fart could soon turn into a poonami! Which my kids think is hilarious!

Hope everyone's butts are feeling better, and genuinely that god for the lot of you as it keeps it real!

Bit of Fun - love the shoes and the dress

ranout - well it didn't start off great this morning for me! Two Loperamide taken so far.

Is anyone else thinking of trying to "arrange" their chemo around Christmas? If everything runs to plan my next one will be 19/12 and I am thinking of asking whether it will be possible to bring it forward a couple of days until 17/12. It might not be possible appointments wise but does anyone think they wouldn't like to do it a couple of days before it would normally happen? (it's been strictly 3 week cycle up until now). If I can get it moved to 17/12 then my injections will be finished on Christmas Eve and should start to feel well enough to eat at least someone of the Christmas Dinner that my husband will be cooking .

I know it's trivial in the grand scheme....

@Mrstraveller not trivial at all. I'm booked for the 21st so if things ho as they have been I should be fine 22/23 the joint pain hell 24/25/26 coupled with the shits and not being able to couch without a red hot poker up my arse feeling.

Doesn't prompt me to launch into a rendition of 'deck the halls' but work/childcare wise it's the most suitable date so I guess I'll manage 

@ranoutofquinoaandprosecco I'm glad you appreciate the seriousness of the fart situation

Am now away to pluck my chin before this gig because although my head is bald apparently my fucking facial hair has more grit

Evening, I was wondering if I could bring my chemo forward a day too! I'm due to have my last lot on 18 Dec. It all depends if I still have to take the injections I'll see what the oncologist says this Thursday. I'm totally going to see if I can pre book my picc line cleaning for Xmas eve, as early as possible!

ranout

I think a day will probably be fine but I think with 2 days I might be pushing it and they might tell me it’s too soon after the last one.

I’ll ask the question when I go in for the next one which is 28/11.

Xx

Hi All, I'm Caz and I was diagnosed with invasive lobular breast cancer last week. I'm 44, have one DD who is about to turn 4 and I'm currently caring for my DH who has a disability and has problems with his spine which causes pain and its affects his strength, partly in his arms. I've been in complete denial since I found a small lump near my right armpit about a month ago. I even though it would still turn out not to be cancer after the sonographer told me it looked 'iffy'!!

It is quite a small lump, it measured 1cm on one scan and 2.4cm on the other. Provisionally grade 2, they haven't said what stage but pressumming stage 1 as my lymph nodes looked ok on the ultrasound. I'm having an MRI next week, then lumpectomy and sential node removal planned for the 6th. Then radiotherapy in the new year, and tamoxifen for 10 years.

I know I don't have it as bad as some of you here, but I'm shitting myself. I'm terrible with anything medical, I was shaking and feeling dizzy all through the examinations, I had to sit down for the mammogram. I've been to my GP to get diazepam for when I have the MRI, and she also gave me anti-depressants to help with the anxiety, which are making me a bit fuzzy headed. In the bad moments I'm worrying about it spreading or coming back. In better moments I'm worrying about how we are going to cope with the day to day if I'm not able to do much after the operation and during the radiotherapy. I'm the one who puts everyone's socks on, am I going to be able to do that after the op?! And where am I going to find a non-wired bra that doesn't give me one huge monoboob?! I had loads of trouble finding a nursing bra when I was breast feeding, I just gave up and wore a balconette bra.

Anyway, that's me for now.

Hi Caz. Sorry you find yourself here. Can I suggest you read this thread from the start? I think you will find it very reassuring because the majority of women on here have breast cancer and you will find they're all coping in different ways. Yes there are problems and difficulties and feeling shit and constipation etc etc, but we're mostly leading 'normal' lives - working, mothering, living etc... Your DH's problems obviously add another dimension of course - have a word with Macmillan and see if they have any suggestions / support.

And yes, most of us get shit scared about operations - and MRI scans too - but we get through it. And you will too.

Caz sorry you find yourself here.
I know what you mean about feeling that others have worse situations. I know I think that when I read about others experiences on here. I’m always amazed that people are able to retain a sense of humour - see recent poo related posts!
But we all have different needs and we all need help and support. I’ve had a difficult few years for various reasons and I was feeling emotionally fragile before my diagnosis. You sound as though you have a lot to deal with so be kind to yourself.
I had surgery last week. I am still feeling sore and I’m not really fit yet for doing things around the house. Do you have anyone who can help out for a week or two after the surgery?
I filled the freezer with some batch cooked meals and some ready meals before my surgery. I have been getting DH to heat these but if I’m honest if I had to do it I’d manage. I wouldn’t manage properly cooking though.
I have been reading The Complete Guide to Breast Cancer by Trisha greenhalgh and Liz o’riordan which I’ve found really helpful. It describes all the treatment and is written by a breast surgeon and a GP who have both been through breast cancer.

Oh and I didn’t answer your question about the non wired bra. I am now the proud owner of three nonwired bras from M and S. They all give me a very unflattering mono boob. But they are very comfortable which is my current priority. I am wearing them 24 hours as I do have pain when I don’t.

Happy Sunday everyone :)

Welcome Caz, but sorry you've had to join us

I hope everyone's bowels are behaving themselves today. My morphine is giving me urine retention, which is basically the same as constipation, but with wee.

I've been out in the garden for some fresh air. My oxygen tube only just stretches far enough!

BitOfFun that dress is lovely. I have some shoes very similar to those, but flat. They always put a spring in my step. I sometimes wear them to chemo :) your wedding plans sound perfect.

Re. Christmas and chemo, they are generally happy to delay but prefer not to bring it forward, depending on the cycle length. Get in quick with your requests as lots of people will want to move their appointment and my chemo unit is always really hectic the week before Christmas.

I haven't had breast surgery, but I have some nice stretchy fabric bras from Sainsbury's. My lymph nodes used to swell up each chemo cycle and make it too painful to wear a normal bra. And they're actually so comfortable that I now wear them every day! They are also handy for scans and chest x-rays as they have no metal

Good evening everyone.
Hello @CazY777 sorry to see you here. I was diagnosed with breast cancer back in July. Interestingly the MRI was something that I was also really bothered about when I was diagnosed. To be honest it was absolutely fine, I made sure I turned up well in advance so I didn't stress about parking, I did some controlled breathing to sort out my nerves and the staff were amazing. I'm not sure if they will do this with you but they taped cod liver oil capsules to my nipples! This is so that they can locate them on the scan! Because you are laid on your tummy I think it makes the process much easier as you can't see anything and that was fine with me. They also gave me a little alarm to hold and if I didn't feel comfortable I could squeeze it and they would stop the scan. I've had one more since and have another one on Tuesday which to be honest I'm absolutely fine about. I'm afraid it all gets a bit boring after the first time!
On the bra front I ordered a couple of bralets from M&S after my biopsy as I was sore with a normal bra. I haven't had my surgery yet as I'm having chemo first but I know our hospital will help you with bras etc. Although I have been speaking to someone else locally who's had a mastectomy and she said underwear is a bit boring! Obviously there's a business opportunity to us uniboobed lot in the future!
Please feel free to ask any questions. I've had so much help from these ladies.

I had to have a gazillion MRIs for something separate from the age of about 10-25. When I was 10 they were brand new and A Big Deal! Now I have them every couple of months, though more CT scans. Leslie’s advice about a wire free bra is great as the alternative is having to get changed in a tiny little cupboard room, but actually it sounds like for boobs they want access anyway! The radiographers are all lovely and all used to first timers so it’s definitely not worth worrying about. It is one of those things that will turn out to be loads easier than you imagined. I promise!

Leslie I think I have the same bras as you. I love them so much that I bought my totally cancer free sister some and she is a convert too!

Hi Caz, your diagnosis is very similar to mine. I got some bras from Glamourise, I can't remember the make but they are really comfy with wide bits on the straps. I have huge norks though.

BitofFun love the shoes and the dress.

I just can't stop sleeping at the moment. Bowels are back to normal but I'm having my next round of chemo on Wednesday, all being well with my bloods after my recent hospital escapades. I expect dire rear to aggressively return by the end of the week. I'm hoping it goes ahead as normal as it's the second round of the Doce/antibodies. Now they have sorted the sickness meds I hopefully won't get so ill with it, which will be a good sign for the next one, my good week for round 3 is Christmas week.

Those shoes look fab bitoffun and perfect for with the dress. Your 'something borrowed'

I did chuckle when I read everyone's ability to manage a fart now, I have had many iffy moments in that department, but fortunately no accident yet!

Welcome to the thread caz & sorry you find yourself here. I have breast cancer and have had chemo since July and my last one at the start of Nov. My op is booked in for the 11th Dec which sounds similar to yours (lumpectomy & node clearance) I have been told not to do any lifting (even not being able to get washing out of the machine, lifting a kettle, pegging washing out etc etc) so any help you can get immediately afterwards would probably help you out loads. I have got my parents staying from then until after Christmas as I have a 7 year old and a 4 year old & would really struggle without their help.

Leslie urine retention sounds painful. I hope it clears soon.
I am still getting very tired & most nights am collapsing into bed about 10 mins after the kids! Otherwise fine though & no bowel issues thankfully

I hope everyone has had a good weekend

I have been told to get a front fastening non under wired bra for after the op by the breast cancer nurse. I haven't started looking yet, but will head to Sainsburys next week to see what they have got. The nurse advised to try the supermarkets first and not spend a fortune as I wouldn't be wearing them for too long....
I think M&S are vat free though for post op bras...

Thanks All, I really appreciate all your kind words and wisdom, and I think you're all brave as fuck! I've had 2 MRIs before, and that's part of the problem I think, I know what it's like! I freaked out at being so enclosed at the first one, so they sent me to a wider one and I just about managed that. But that was lying on my back, so face down might be better, and they've said you go in feet first so your head is near the entrance. But I've also got to have an injection of dye for contrast, so I'm going to take the diazepam anyway!

I'm still worried about how we're doing to cope with the day-to-day stuff. I do all the cleaning, getting my daughter ready and to nursery, the washing, anything that involves bending down or reaching up high. DH does cook but he has trouble getting things out of the oven and often drops things. My step daughter is coming up to help for a few days when I have the op, and my parents are about 20 mins away and they will help. Everyone else we know is 300 miles away, as we moved just over a year ago. But I may be able to enlist a bit more help, I only told family and one friend so far. I will also talk to Macmillan to see what they suggest.

@CazY777 take all the help you can get and don't mind asking for it.
I thought I could still do everything and my body is now saying slow down. Fingers crossed it won't be forever but rest is so important. I've got DCs aged 5 and 7 and no family where we live but we've had so much support it's really has been humbling.
Another tip the ladies on here have given me is the try and get out for a walk most days if you can. It does seem to make a different a bit of fresh air.

Caz

Hi and welcome. It’s good that it sounds like you’ve spotted the lump and had it checked out early which is good. If the MRI makes you a bit panicky sounds like taking the diazepam is a good idea - we need all the help we can get!

I found my first MRI quite difficult but have to say I’ve become quite blasé about them now. I try to just concentrate on my breathing and shut out other thoughts.

I have breast cancer too but am having chemo, mastectomy etc.

Thank you both, I do try and get out for walks or just a bit of fresh air whenever I can. The breast care nurse did say I'd done well for spotting it early, but I think it just luck that's near the surface, if it was deep in my boob I wouldn't have found it. How can such a small thing cause such trouble!!