My period makes me want to kill myself

[KevinTheDinosaur]

Hello
I realise I'm not exactly your average MN poster, but here we go.
I'm a 14 year old girl who's been having my period since I was 12. It started off alright, but soon after my cycle settled down I started getting period pains, mood swings, the standard. Soon after I turned 13, I had a period where I started TMI alert projectile vomitting and suffering from diarrhoea, culminating in me fainting and having to go to hospital, where I was diagnosed with dysmenorrhea.

Since then, I've been having tranexemic acid for the blood loss, mefenamic acid for the pain, and cyclizene for the nausea. Luckily, I haven't experienced a period that bad since then, apart from fainting in school a few times from blood loss and pain.

My problem is that now, my period seems to be having an effect on my mental health, as well as my physical.

The seven days I have my period, despite the medication and the aid of Buscopan, paracetamol, and ibuprofen, I am always in intense pain. On days two and three I cannot get out of bed without collapsing on my bedroom floor, even though my bleeding is about average, I get through a pack of pads per period. After my period finishes, I get a couple of days pain free, then I start getting pain above my hips, on either side, for about 5 days. Then for about another 5 days I get cramps, shaking hands, headaches, etc. Then, for 2 or 3 days, I'll get crippling pain, where I'll have to get by on paracetamol and buscopan. My eczema also flares up horrendously these days, resulting in bleeding and weeping. My mental health also becomes less than ideal. I cry at the smallest of things, and begin contemplating suicide. It's not even big things which set me off, just little things, and I end up sitting in lessons thinking that if I jumped out of the classroom window, my classmates would probably have a party. I haven't actually tried to commit suicide, I've only got as far as finding out how many pills of my other medicines I would need to take to kill myself. Then, the next day, 2 weeks after the first period, I'll start again.

I suppose I'm asking, what techniques do you have for dealing with the effect of your period on your health, and would you mind sharing them with me, so I can take back control of my life from my period?

Thank you for reading this, and I'm really sorry for the essay.

Well I’m sure this thread is now full of tumbleweed, but I’m going to my appointment at the only other paediatric gynaecologist in my city today.

In the intervening months, my issues have continued, and even when we went to my aunt’s wedding I had to take codeine and be fully spaced out whilst seeing cousins I’ve not seen in 7 years, which was a bit sad.

Sadly, I didn’t even escape from doctors whilst on holiday, going to two in as many weeks. I’ve also not had a week this year where I’ve not been to a doctor/specialist/nurse, and it won’t be this week either, as I’m going today, or next week, as I have an appointment for my ingrown toenails. It seems my life is revolving around the NHS and GCSEs at the moment, so I’m not very happy.

I’m a bit anxious about today, I think it’ll be pointless, but to be honest I’ve given up all hope with my health now

Good luck with the appointment . The one thing you have to be in this situation is persistent - don't be persuaded to go away without a proper treatment pathway being put in motion.

I can see from your earlier posts that the doctors were unwilling to do a laparoscopy - is that something you could explore with the consultant? I think you need a definite diagnosis, and laparoscopy is normally the only way to be certain about endometriosis.

Good luck with the appointment.

Do not go in there thinking it will be pointless; you need to be heard properly. I would still put money on it that all your symptoms are due to you having endometriosis. I doubt very much that it is PMDD at all.

Keep a daily pain and symptom diary particularly if you do not already do this.

@KevinTheDinosaur How did you get on today?

Oh dear.

I‘m not very happy with today’s outcome. I think the consultant maybe was wording her words in a way I don’t get, because she said it’s quite normal when you are young, and “some people are more stoic and other faint”. I was a little bit upset by this, but hey ho, I’m choosing to be more optimistic this year. She said to start the combined pill at the beginning of my next cycle, and then run the packs together for three months, which should get me through my GCSEs. Then we‘ll meet again in August, and if they don’t work, she said I’ll probably have to have a coil put in. Additionally, she said it doesn’t sound like I had an allergic reaction to the mini pill, but she’s not sure if I will react to the combined pill, in which case I should try and see if she’s free before August to see her. But, on the positive side, she did say “these issues will probably sort themselves out when you have a baby,” which did upset me a bit but I think she meant well.

So overall she said it’s pretty normal and we can only treat it with some form of hormonal therapy.

I was quite upset though, and as I’m taking history and we’re studying Health and the People, I did feel a bit sad when my teacher affirmed that nowadays everyone is treated by finding the root cause of their issue, not by just treating the symptoms. Personally, I feel like the symptoms are just being treated, but it could be worse I suppose.

Well, I think you need to keep a close eye on your symptoms once you start the combined pill - if it isn't helping or you have an adverse reaction, don't wait till August to go back.

I've no personal experience of the mirena coil - I know it gets mixed reviews on here. It does seem to be a common first line attempt at managing endometriosis and some people swear by it whereas others have bad side effects and find it makes their periods worse.

As for being told the symptoms will sort themselves out 'when you have a baby' - words fail! Did you go back in time to the 1950s for your appointment? Is your consultant not aware that many women don't want or aren't in a position to 'have a baby' in order to sort out their gynae issues? Or that painful periods/endo aren't exactly helpful if you are trying to conceive?

Please don't let them fob you off. If the combined pill or mirena don't work, keep on pushing them for a diagnostic laparoscopy and if appropriate, a referral to a specialist endometriosis centre.

If advised to have the coil, my suggestion would be to post a new thread specifically about that, as there's lots of experience on here.

Above all, remember that painful periods to the degree you describe are not "normal" and you deserve to have them treated properly.

I've just read through this thread and couldn't not post.
I don't have any useful suggestions I'm afraid but just wanted to post in solidarity to you and to express my fury that young girls such as you (and me, at your age) are expected to put up with this life-wrecking agony for days on end every month and it be described as 'normal'. I honestly think some health professionals have NO IDEA just how incredibly painful this can be, and how debilitating. I'm sure some female Drs just measure it against their own experiences, which may not be so bad, and make assumptions. Grrrr.
Anyway, like I say, I'm sorry that I can't offer any solutions, I really wish I could, other than just to keep on and keep on going back to the Drs and pushing for all possible treatments and options. At 14 this is not easy and I take my hat off to you for your determination and skill in dealing with these doctors at such a young age - those skills will take you far in life!
I do hope things start improving for you soon, and best wishes for all your exams and everything.

Op, you sound so lovely.
Have you asked your doctors about pmdd? I take the mini pill, antidepressants and use evening primrose oil.

You shouldn’t have to feel like this.

Sorry it doesn't feel like you got the answers you wanted, but it sounds like at least there is a plan, and an appointment to review. Have you got a date for the review?

What in particular do you wish had gone differently? Or do you think was overlooked?

I think the pill will really help. Which brand have you been given ?

Thank you for your kind words SealSong and Littlechocola.
The last time I asked my GP a question about this issue, she said I was being “too inquisitive and you need to listen to me,” so I’ve become a bit put off by asking questions (even though she’s the one who said to go to Umbrella, who said she shouldn’t have told me to go there).
Pannacott yes, it is a positive that there is a plan, you’re right. I don’t have a set date for my review, it’ll come through in 4 weeks I think. It’ll probably be mid August, so just before my birthday.

I think if she’d talked a bit more about what may be causing it, rather than just giving me symptom relief, it would have been better. Also if she hadn’t mentioned having a baby, because that’s been preying on my mind since then. What if I don’t find a partner? What if I have fertility problems? What if my partner has fertility problems? What if I don’t want children? Will I then just have to suffer until the menopause? It just seems like a very uncertain form of treatment to me.

rainsbows30 she said she’s given me the 20mg instead of the 30mg, because I reacted to the mini pill, but I don’t know the brand, sorry!

Kevin

I would complain also about the GP who said that to you re being too inquisitive!. You were also let down by the NHS female gynae who saw you as well and you've been fobbed off as a result. What you're having in terms of symptoms is not pretty normal at all!!. Far from it, periods should not ever be this painful.

No-one to date is looking for the cause here; they are simply trying to treat the symptoms. The cause as well as the symptoms needs to be properly determined.

In your situation I would change GP practice and insist with your mother's support (how supportive is she though?) that you are referred to a specialist endometriosis centre. I would put a crisp tenner on it that this is the root cause of your ongoing symptoms because your posts are highly similar to my own in terms of symptoms at that age.

I was not listened to either and sadly you won't be until you find a medical person who is prepared to put the work in and determine what is wrong here. I would also contact Endometriosis UK's helpline to see what they suggest

www.endometriosis-uk.org/

Unfortunately I have absolutely no advice for you but, as a female the same age as you, you have my complete sympathy and I hope that the plan you have with your doctors is helpful for you!

And to me (I'm certainly no doctor) that doesn't sound 'pretty normal' at all!!

Sorry for dragging this back up again.

I’ve started the pill now (Loestrin 20), but I’m getting a really horrible, constant type of pain that really really hurts. It’s the same type of pain I was getting when I was taking the mini pill, except I’m also feeling constantly nauseous. I’m also getting ovulation pains, and my boobs are sore and painful, which is odd because the leaflet says I’m not meant to be ovulating while I take this pill.

Perhaps unreasonably I’m a bit worried about this, because my GCSEs begin on Monday, and I’m in so much pain I can barely concentrate on anything else. Also the nausea means I’m having to carry a sick bag almost 24/7. Am I being melodramatic? And in the meantime does anyone have any tips/ideas on how to make the pain lessen? I’ve had a quick Google but I can’t find anything about the pill causing more pain.

Also, what should I do? My mum keeps saying we should go to the GP, but last time they just said stop taking the pill, which didn’t stop the period. Should I try and get my mum to ring up the paediatric gynaecologist? But I don’t really have much time for that, I have exams and a lot of work to do for them.

Sorry for being such a nuisance, but if anyone could help I’d be really grateful

Hang on in with the loestrin 20. After one month it stopped my cycle completely for a year - even with taking the pill free week I never bled.