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Original poster

Cervical cancer

48 replies

NicJane · 27/11/2006 17:47

Hi I'm new to mn and hoping someone out there can help. I have been diagnised with cervical cancer and need a complete hysterectomy including ovaries within next 6 weeks. Although I'm content with the treatment plan (don't fancy risk of chemo if less agressive with surgery)I don't really know how to bring my kids through it. I have told them that I have cancer, and that its early and the doctors can make me better. They seem OK with that but my 8 yr old dd keeps asking Daddy (who is being fantastic) if I'll die. I daren't promise not for fear of tempting fate - its a big op and there ARE risks -what can I tell her?

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JoolsToo · 27/11/2006 17:49

Sorry have no experience but wanted to say hello and welcome and I'm sure someone with some good advice will be along soon.

Hope your treatment goes well

fairyjay · 27/11/2006 18:08

My ds asked his surgeon if he could die during an operation. The surgeon said he was more likely to die crossing the road. So you're not lying, but putting it into a perspective which an 8 year old can understand.

Sorry to hear you're going thru' this, and wish you a speedy recovery.

fulloflife · 27/11/2006 18:12

NicJane, I just wanted to send you an enormous hug at this time. I admire your positive attitude and hope it all goes well for you. My DD is 11 and asked if I had cancer just because I am going to the doctor tomorrow. These little children are such worriers are'nt they. I guess just trying to keep it simple is the best you can do and hopefully they will be fine with any explanation you give them. Wishing you lots of support and care.

Pennies · 27/11/2006 18:13

Sorry to hear of you're ill. I had a malignant melanoma not so long ago and sought advice over this sort of thing from the Cancer Councelling Trust - www.cctrust.org.uk - although I did not face the same issue that you are having with your DD, but I'm sure they might well help you and the rest of your family through your illness.

I hope the op goes well and you make a good recovery.

Original poster
NicJane · 27/11/2006 19:05

Thanks so much everyone - especially fairyjay - what a good suggestion. I'm such a duh brain at the mo - still absorbing the news I guess. Seeing the surgeon on Thursday and all I can think of to ask him is what will the seat belt feel like for the journey home cos we live 45 mins away from the hospital! I don't want to stay in hospital longer than necessary, but... what if DH has to do an emergency stop!!!!! Pennies - did you find yourself hung up on insignificant stuff? I hope you are all clear now.
Am so relieved to let off steam about all this - keeping a smile on my face for the family is hard work!

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Pennies · 27/11/2006 19:28

Not really, in fact quite the reverse. I became very self absorbed and stressed and let normal stuff just hang for a while until I knew what exactly was going on (this took about 6 weeks). DD1 was only 4 months old at the time it all happened and I just spent the entire time looking on the dark side of things and thinking I'd never live to see her grow up.

I have to have checks annually for 5 years (well, only anohter 3 years now) but I have been told that it is pretty much certain that there was no spread.

I still have very dark moments about it and it is always in my mind but I did go on to have another baby which I would never have done if I didn't think I'd be around for a lot longer to come!!

Original poster
NicJane · 27/11/2006 20:02

I think the minutiae (?sp!) is a safe zone for my brain. Anything big is too much just now. Doesn't help that I had minor op for unrelated stuff last week and feel rank! Went back to work today to try and take my mind off things but it was too soon and had to come home at lunchtime. Paying the price now!! Wish I was on a hot sunny desert island!!

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CaptainDippy · 27/11/2006 20:43

No experience, but [[hugs]] nicjane - hoping someone who has been through similar experience will come along for a chat soon. You are being so positive and brave - I admire you so much. Thoughts and prayers are with you honey!

CaptainDippy · 28/11/2006 11:30

How are you doing? Thoughts and Prayers continue to be with you ......

Original poster
NicJane · 28/11/2006 12:16

Hi Ladies
Feeling better this morning - accepted that going back to work was a mistake so at home today with poorly daughter to fuss over!! Am amazed at all the support you are giving - it helps so much. Thank You

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dizietsma · 28/11/2006 18:02

No advice to give, but I just read this and wanted to add my best wishes and ((hugs)).

CaptainDippy · 28/11/2006 19:32

More [[hugs]]

Original poster
NicJane · 30/11/2006 11:20

Getting nervous about the appt this pm. Reading the support msgs here is very calming! Thank you

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CaptainDippy · 30/11/2006 13:54

Really hope the appointment goes well honey - Don't forget to come and report back - More [hugs]

CaptainDippy · 30/11/2006 13:54

Really hope the appointment goes well honey - Don't forget to come and report back - More [hugs]

CaptainDippy · 30/11/2006 13:55

Oooops, extra thoughts .... !?

Original poster
NicJane · 30/11/2006 18:35

Very frustrated after appointment. Lovely surgeon (thank God) but he wanted to revisit my decision to have hysterectomy. He agreed with 1st guy so that's reassuring, but no date yet, still just asap. It was emotionall tiring to go over all the options again, but i'm sure I'll feel better about it in the morning. I know it is a tiny tumour - but ........ squamous something carcinoma.....the words don't half wreck your peace of mind!! Anyone else out there who's had cancer - how long before its not your first thought every waking moment.

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Pennies · 30/11/2006 19:37

Is it a squaemous cell carcionoma? I'm no expert but from my own experience I believe that is very positive. With regard to your options you must do what you feel is the best option for you - don't let the doctors bully you into anything you're not 100% comfortable with. It's great that you like your Dr though - it really helps. Isuspect I'm a little bit in love with my oncologist and if you saw him you'd realise how utterly riduclous that is, but it helps me trust him!!

As for your final question... well it took me a good six weeks and I still think of it often and i has certainly me made me so much more aware of my health and also my nortality. But it does not dominate me so much now as it did before. When I used the Cancer Counselling Trust I found it so useful to talk to them about all ym feelings and in doing so I discovered that my reactions to it (fear, all encompassing obsession over it etc) were all completely normal. Just know that helped me because I was fighting these emotions whilst trying to be positive as I felt they would do me no good. What the counselling taught me was whilst you should not give into them you should allow yourself to feel them and not beat yourself up about being worried. Sorry if this rambles but I hope it helps.

Pennies · 30/11/2006 19:38

sorry re. typos- watching tv.

tribpot · 30/11/2006 19:43

NicJane, big sympathies. A good friend of mine was diagnosed this time last year, and has recently been celebrating her 'No Evidence of Disease' status.

There is a website she found really helpful for people with cervical cancer - not that MN isn't a great resource, but you may want to check it out too. Jo's Trust

CaptainDippy · 01/12/2006 09:36

@ your frustrating appointment. I am sorry you had to come away with no real answers - hoping something postive happens soon honey!

LOL @ being "slightly in love" with your oncologist Pennies - my mum absolutely adores her consultant and I have to admit, for a much older man, he is rather "a dish" as she puts it!! At least it gives you something to look forward to, eh, Pennies!!?

Continuing to to think of you and pray for you NicJane - keep updating!! [hugs]

Original poster
NicJane · 01/12/2006 09:42

Having a bad morning - at home with too much time to think, so I can't stop crying. Can't go out cos I'm waiting for the consultant's secretary to ring with the date, can't phone a friend cos....ditto. Run out of nice tissues and having to use loo roll so now my nose is getting sore - life sucks sometimes.

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CaptainDippy · 01/12/2006 10:10

Have you got a mobile?? Could you text someone / phone someone on that - You shouldn't be alone sweetheart. Is there someone you can call??? Thinking. Praying. [hugs]]

mummylin2495 · 01/12/2006 10:25

nicjane sorry to hear your news but this is just to offer you some support i too had a hysterectomy with the oopherectomy too ( removal of ovaries )and luckily for me there was no cancer but a grapefruit size fibroid which was hard like a cricket ball,apparently fibroids are normally soft and squashy, and so they thought i had a tumour too ,the three weeks before my op i was a complete and utter wreck and was so scared,I can only symathise with you and wish you all the best,but the actual operation was fine.wishing you a speedy recovery from when you have your op.try not to be scared,you are one of the lucky ones in that you have been diagnosed and they are gonna treat you soon ,keep your chin up.

Original poster
NicJane · 01/12/2006 10:25

Have got a mobile, but the one's I really want to talk to are mostly at work. Have texted good friend who is an at-home-mum, but no reply yet. DDDDDDh has promised to ring the hosp if they haven't phoned by midday, so I only have to manage till then

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