**Tamoxigang thread 51**... no more sangria, but maybe some mulled wine!

[MarthaCostello]

Hello all,

The old thread has nearly run out so I hope no one minds me making a new one. And am I allowed to mention the Big C... Christmas?! our last thread was started in July so I reckon this one might take us into December.

In honour of that, I will lay out some mulled wine, mince pies and I have wrapped myself in tinsel.

A warm welcome to jomidmum, but sorry you've had to join us. No one wants to be in this club, but this thread is a rather nice place to be. Wishing you a speedy recovery from your op, and hoping the pain eases soon.

Massive hugs to beccajoh

A big yippee for Marshy, what utterly fantastic news.

Sitting on the paranoia box for ConsiderablyBiggerBuns, I hope your MRI results are good - when will you hear?

Waving and sending love to everyone else.

I wonder if seeing as we are on a new thread, it might be worth just giving a bit of history for new posters? I will put mine anyway, and then others can if they want to. I am coming up to two years since my bowel cancer diagnosis (grade 2, stage 3c, T2N2M0R0). I had major bowel surgery and six months of chemo.

Ssaver, I wanted to just post something quickly about 'guilt' and 'blame' for getting cancer. Apparently it is mainly women (quelle surprise) who worry about this, men tend to just want to know how to get better. So I have deliberately tried to think like a man, because for me, going over every extra glass of wine, every hangover, every cigarette smoked when drunk etc etc is not going to be helpful for my recovery. Since my diagnosis I have met women who run marathons, who eat only wholefoods, who don't drink or smoke, who have perfect BMIs, who are vegetarians and who have STILL got breast cancer. I've also met women who are frankly too young to have had time to develop any bad habits, also with breast cancer. While we all know about risk factors, there is not necessarily going to be a direct cause and effect for why we are all here. One of the many shitty things about cancer is that it can strike anyone, at any time, for no real reason.

There are things I want to change about my lifestyle since diagnosis, I would like to run more and drink less, partly because it might improve my chances of not getting this bloody illness again, but also because life is short and I want to really feel ALIVE for however much time I have left.

To get through this we have to be kind and gentle to ourselves as we would to a dear friend going through this

Good post elporto we wouldn't ever think it of anyone's else's illness so I don't know why we feel such guilt about our own

Totally agree Elporto.

Quick question for a friend. Her hair isn't really growing back that much. It didn't start coming back while she was on the docetaxol and now she's finished has only grown a little bit. She has read somewhere that sometimes hair doesn't grow back so she is worrying a little bit. Did anyone else's hair take a while to start growing again? Would like to be able to reassure her.

Ahh, dear Elporto thank you for your kind and very wise words.
Hope you are feeling better now - sounds like you've had an exhausting week.

Sounds like all the new boobs are doing well which is great news. I hope the general sickness is not so bad this weekend ... It's not hit me yet... only in the first cycle... waiting for it ... Didn't sleep a wink last night though - probably due to the Steroids.

Speedy I asked my Oncologist/BCN loads of questions about hair loss. She said that it's extremely, extremely rare for hair not to grow back. For me (AC, Taxol and Carboplatin), she said to expect a 'false start' immediately after chemo which may not be similar to your original hair texture(?!) and then it might take up to 5 months for normal growth to resume (I know!). It's got something to do with your body catching up on nutrients. I'm sure if your friend has some hair coming through at all that's a really good sign. Glittery wig/scarf required for Christmas but it will all be good in time for spring!

BeccaJoh How are you? Good luck with your appointment on Monday - I'll be thinking of you x

Interesting and very true Elporto. I specifically remember when I was first diagnosed my consultant telling me that it wasn't my fault and wasn't down to anything I had or hadn't done. Always had a fairly healthy lifestyle, don't drink or smoke, have a healthy weight and breast fed my children. There was an interesting discussion on the Macmillan forum a few days ago regarding diet. So many different views on what we should and shouldn't eat.

Sorry don't have any advice about your friends hair Speedy.

Hope everyone is having a good weekend and best of luck with your appointment on Monday Becca x

Speedy, my oncologist said there were a very few (3 or 5) cases of hair loss after docetaxol. I think she disclosed it because I'm in the US and they're always worried about lawsuits!

My last chemo was 1st July. They said I've have fuzz after one month, it took two. It's definitely been slow - only the last few weeks that my whole head is finally covered. Looks like a military crewcut - which is very strange as I've always had quite long hair. I still don't look like myself.

But it is regrowing. Please tell your friend not to give up. I won't advise patience because I don't have any Apparently much depends on the timing of when the chemo hit the growth cycles of your hair follicles. How long ago was her last chemo?

Thanks all.
Her last chemo was about two and a half weeks ago. Mine started growing back after first docetaxol but I guess everyone is different. Will let her know what has been said.

ssaver I had AC too (4 AC, 4 Taxol). I suffered through sleepless nights for several days at beginning of each cycle of AC. It got really bad on a Taxol and I finally requested sleeping tablets. I was so sorry I didn't ask for some to cover me for a few nights while on AC. It just never occurred to me...

So don't be shy asking for sleeping tablets to cover the days you are taking steroids. Or for as much as you need them.

I had 6 x doxetaxcel, finishing last October. My hair is now in a "normal" short hair style. I've had it trimmed and shaped regularly from May onwards but it is only now getting long enough to shake and get some movement (if that makes sense). It is still chemo hair though - very frizzy at the front.
Although my Oncologist told me it would all fall out after the 2nd dose, I wasn't warned of the possibility that might be permanent - the Macmillan leaflet says "your hair will almost always start to grow again once the treatment is finished".

Thanks lily. The hairdresser who deals with lots of people with chemo said I should have it all cut in a few weeks to let it grow back more strongly but I don't really want to do that!

So I've progressed been in hospital since I last posted whilst they're getting all the symptoms controlled. I'm on a new drug now, ipiluminab, which is four doses each three weeks apart. Terrified I won't live long enough to see any effects

Oh Becca

Am sorry you are facing this and have been in hospital. Am keeping everything crossed that this drug works well for you. Will be thinking of you lots. Huge hugs and hand holding.

Big hugs Becca, we've all been thinking about you. Fingers crossed that this new drug does it's stuff x

Oh Becca, I have been thinking about you all this week. How terrifying and horrible for you. I am sorry you are in hospital but glad they have been monitoring you closely and controlling your symptoms. At least this new drug gives you hope and I also am keeping everything crossed that it works well and you have an excellent response. All of us hugging and holding out our hands. xx

Good morning Becca, I've also been thinking of you all week. I'm so sorry you've been in hospital but it sounds like you've been getting the care and treatment you need. I have everything crossed that this new drug will get going quickly my love. Hugs and hand holding right here whenever you need it, I wish there was more I could do

I'm also thinking of you Becca. BIG HUGS XXXX

Hello Becca, I was so sorry to read you've been in hospital again, I can't imagine how frightening it is. I hope this new drug does its stuff quickly and gets things under control for you. Keep posting, there's usually someone around for a bit of moral support, I think we're all looking out for you especially at the moment.

Hello to everyone else, I have been reading but not posted much. Paulo Nutini was brilliant a week ago. This weekend we went down to London and struggled through the crowds to see the poppies. On one of the photos of me there is a lady standing behind me in a head scarf. I immediately wondered if it might be one of you, stupid I know.

Best wishes to all facing treatment or results this week and those enjoying a spell of relief between treatments.

Morning all,
Just tried to post and lost it so apologies if this appears twice.
Wishing everyone a good week and especially sending becca positive vibes this week - big hug my lovely.
Elporto I thought your comments up thread were spot on and gave me things to think about as I contemplate negotiating my return to work date.
My Friday night out was good. It felt almost like a date as dh was waiting in the bar for me when I got to the concert hall. The music was fab - Tchaikovsky played by the St Petersburg Philharmonic. One of the trumpet players reminded me of my dss who we havent seen for ages as he has been working in Tanzania for the last 18 months. I may have shed one or two tears....
Need to get sorted as I have a friend coming round in a little while. See you all later

Becca, sending you a very large , which won't be a lot of consolation. That's the new drug I thought they would put you on back in April when I first mentioned it to you. They are seeing good results on it. Really hope it starts working pronto.

Becca, been thinking of you lots. Hope the new drug kicks in soon and you feel better again.

Another one thinking of you Becca x

Just popping in to send love and to becca. I hope that you soon see an improvement from the new drugs xx

Thinking of you, Becca . Hope the ipilimumab starts working quickly.

becca I'm so sorry you're back in hospital. like everyone else I'm thinking of you and hope the drugs starting working well and soon x

Also thinking of you becca and sending huge hugs.

Hope everyone has a good day.