**Tamoxigang thread 51**... no more sangria, but maybe some mulled wine!

[MarthaCostello]

Hello all,

The old thread has nearly run out so I hope no one minds me making a new one. And am I allowed to mention the Big C... Christmas?! our last thread was started in July so I reckon this one might take us into December.

In honour of that, I will lay out some mulled wine, mince pies and I have wrapped myself in tinsel.

A warm welcome to jomidmum, but sorry you've had to join us. No one wants to be in this club, but this thread is a rather nice place to be. Wishing you a speedy recovery from your op, and hoping the pain eases soon.

Massive hugs to beccajoh

A big yippee for Marshy, what utterly fantastic news.

Sitting on the paranoia box for ConsiderablyBiggerBuns, I hope your MRI results are good - when will you hear?

Waving and sending love to everyone else.

I wonder if seeing as we are on a new thread, it might be worth just giving a bit of history for new posters? I will put mine anyway, and then others can if they want to. I am coming up to two years since my bowel cancer diagnosis (grade 2, stage 3c, T2N2M0R0). I had major bowel surgery and six months of chemo.

minty my bcn told me that the doses they give these days are v strong, so dropping a little bit really should not be a problem. V happy to help wrt advice. Might not apply to you but was something I was not aware of and got a nice little sum from the DWP.

Thanks malt, yes I've told him and he was great as always. We actually have BUPA cover, which I haven't used so far, but he's going to call them this morning, whilst I'm at the hairdresser, to see if they can do this for me more quickly. It was the waiting for results last time which was horrendous. But you all know that. Our local BUPA hospital is only a 5 minute walk away but I don't know what facilities they have. Hopefully I'll have an appt somewhere sorted today.

Did you have a good birthday elporto?

Mrs glad you DH is being lovely. Hopefully the Bupa cover will come through and you can get seen quickly. Enjoy the hairdressers, hopefully you get a good head massage.

Minty. I had my dose lowered after the first one as it was doing horrible things to my stomach. I knew several people there who had the same thing. The lower dose still gave me a good outcome.

Hope everyone has a good day.

Well the nhs have come up trumps again with an appt with the consultant tomorrow afternoon. The best BUPA could do was 1 December and I'd need a gp referral to book it. Unfortunately there will be no scan tomorrow as the clinic is full but at least someone will be able to give it a good feel and have an opinion. I'm trying not to get too stressed out this time. I chose not to have the head massage, my back is still playing up and I wanted to be out of the chair quickly.

Hope everyone is having a good day.

Glad you have an appointment for tomorrow Mrs. Hopefully they will put your mind at rest.

Grrrr. What a day. So I turn up for my chemo today and for the first time a friend arranged to join me there ( for the first few cycles I was 'happy' to go on my own). I hadn't got as far as the cannula going in when the nurse came to tell me that the pharmacy had sent up the old dose of taxol and therefore I couldn't have any treatment today. I'm treated at a satellite clinic of the Royal Marsden and so it wasn't possible to quickly knock up a batch of the new dose.

They said I would have to come back on Monday - cue me bursting into tears and telling them they had just ruined everything especially Christmas (my last dose was due to be on 18th dec so I had hoped to be pain free with everything behind me by the 25th).

Anyway, they've arranged for me to go back in tomorrow so it's not quite as bad as it could have been. My friend then took me into town where we had a lovely long lunch and lots of laughs to help lift my mood. So I'm feeling marginally better but so cross and upset by it all. Why do these things get sent to try us?

Great news though mrs that you can be seen tomorrow. As you seen even if all they can do is have a feel of the lump, hopefully they can give you some idea of what it might be.

Hi all,

Haven't posted for a while. Waving to all and welcome to saveme.

I've been feeling a bit down in the dumps the last couple of weeks - just very tearful for no specific reason and feeling exhausted. Finally saw GP and have started on an antidepressant and have a referral for counselling. I discussed it with a good friend who is a mental health nurse and she said she thought both were a good idea, so will give it a go.

I've got sciatica at the moment as well, which is uncomfortable and getting me down. It came on post-op and I think is due mainly to not being able to sleep on my front over recent weeks as that tends to keep my back in good shape. Sorry....moan, moan, moan.

Mrs - sorry to hear you have some worry again (and a bad back as well I notice!) I will be keeping everything crossed for you.

Minty - that sounds like a frustrating day. Glad you got it sorted for tomorrow. I can well understand how upsetting it would be to have your plans messed up.

Speedy - how is your healing going?

Hope everyone is ok.

Hi marshy. Moaning is therapeutic! It's a pain not being able to change sleep positions. I hope the pain goes away soon for you. Sorry that you have been feeling rubbish and hopefully the antidepressants will start to help.
Healing going well thanks, although I think I may have done too much at the beginning of week as I felt so much better. Have started doing exercises above my shoulder. Yesterday and today I feel done in, have a sore boob again and feel a bit nauseas. Went to the doctors and had some blood taken. Was beginning to think I should attempt the 5:2 diet again to lose some weight but that is probably a bad idea! Whinge over.

Minty. Poor you, so glad they can fit it in tomorrow for you. I found it very difficult when things changed as I really felt out of control when that happened. No wonder you were upset. Glad you had a good lunch though.

I'm with BUPA and have cancer cover. They can sometimes pay to you have treatment on the NHS, it might be worth asking about.

Hi All and welcome to saveme. Psychosomatic symptoms all par for the course, the brain is a very powerful organ. Hopefully all will be clear and as if by magic all the symptoms will disappear. When is your op and what are you having done? If it is imminent, you should on the road to recovery by Christmas. I had a double mx and was fit for work in 3 weeks.
Sorry to read that several of you are having bad weeks.
mrs good luck for the appointment tomorrow, fingers crossed you get some reassurance that there is nothing to worry about"
minty I totally understand how upsetting the delay to your treatment would be, the lack of control over any plans is bad enough without the added issue of Christmas.nobody asked me about neuropathy so wasn't spotted until last cycle, my taxol was stopped for that session but it was too late not to have been left with lasting symptoms, frustrating so I'm sure they are doing the right thing.
marshy sorry you are feeling low! a bit of assistance with that sounds the right decision. And sciatica is the pits!
speedy Rory to hear you are still sore. I need to think about a diet at some point, I have put on a stone (not taking into account no boobs)and I wasn't very happy with my weight before. I like the 5:2 diet but think I will wait until after Christmas.
Can I also join in with having a bad week. My mum had another bleed on Tuesday - after making amazing progress from the initial stroke and I had started to relax and get some if my life back. This one was only minor but if gas left her with.residual seizures and more importantly has made us all realise that recovering from her stroke might not be the end of the story. .

Oh buns, sorry to hear about your mum. That must be very worrying for you all. Am guessing she is in the hospital?
The 5:2 was very effective for me last year and manageable. Just so depressing that I have put on the stone I lost.

I'm just having the lump removed so nothing too drastic. I'm fine about that but am worried that this week's scans may show up something else. I just want the waiting to be over and the op to be done!

minty That is so frustrating, glad you had your friend with you and had a nice lunch. Happened to me when Onc lowered my dose, but fortunately the nurses could get it by the afternoon and so not a huge problem.

marshy Moan away. I seem to be abnormally happy and joyful at the moment, am anticipating a slump :-/

buns so sorry to hear about your Mum .... very tough on you.

I am now dieting! The letter form the hospital following MRI on my liver saying I had an 'extremely fatty liver' shocked me into action. I am actually following the diet that you do before bariatic surgery to reduce the liver size. Its actually quite balanced and sensible (they give portions and you have 3 x carb, 2 x protein, 2 x fruit, 2 x milk and 3-5 x veg) I was trying to eat healthily but was eating tons of fruit which is of course q high in sugar. I have also rejoined the gym!
I had even managed to put back on the 7 lbs I lost with my mastectomy and altogether have about 4 stone to lose.

Minty, how very frustrating and upsetting to have your chemo messed up, I'm not at all surprised you were in tears. I'm so pleased they sorted it out or you eventually.

Marshy, sorry to hear you are feeling bad. I hope the antidepressants kick in quickly and lift your mood. Having a bad back is not helpful either, or this gloomy weather. Have you got anything nice planned for the weekend?

Speedy, keep on with the exercises. Hope you're feeling better.

Buns, that's rotten news about your mum again. Is she back in hospital? I know you had a very difficult time after the first stroke, I hope you're feeling a lot stronger now, but such a shame you can't both be getting better together.

I have seen my surgeon this afternoon who wasn't too concerned about my lump and could offer no explanation for it, but he's arranging a scan to be sure. So back to waiting but I'm going to allow myself to be less stressed this time. We have a day in London planned for Saturday next week with the girls and I really want to relax and enjoy it.

Foo, good luck with the diet, you have a few weeks to be restrained before the temptations of Christmas.

Morning all
Minty sorry about your frustrating day I'm glad you had someone with you and didn't have to go through it on your own

Mrs Rhod glad they're not concerned about the lump

Foo good luck with the diet

Marshy sorry you're feeling down and about the sciatica, hope you feel better soon

I'm knackered from work and glad of a quiet weekend. It's lovely to be at school with the build up to Christmas though it was one of the things I really missed last year

Love to all hope everyone has a nice weekend x

Thank you everyone for your support, it really helps being able to moan to people who understand what it's like.

So I went back yesterday and was ushered straight into my own private room - they must have been feeling really guilty, either that or they wanted to keep me away from their private patients who are the only ones usually treated on a Friday! At least it meant I got to have a bed to sleep on as the antihistamines they give knock me for 6. I haven't been given my next appt date yet but have been told to ring on Monday to find out more. So it's still up in the air as to how close to Christmas my last dose will be.

We're off to a 50th birthday party tonight. I probably wouldn't go normally as I'm starting to feel washed out but our friend is also going through chemo right now so even if I only last an hour it's a bit of a metaphorical finger up to cancer. In theory there could be 5 of us at the party currently being treated for cancer which is just shocking.

As a surprise, DH has booked me into a beautician this afternoon to get my make up done. Having very little in the way of eyebrows and lashes now and a spotty and puffy face there's not much I can do myself to make me look glam. It will be lovely to be spoiled. Just hope I can get into my dress as I've put on so much weight on chemo...

But enough of me, mrs I'm pleased to hear that your surgeon isn't too worried about your lump and glad that you don't have to wait too long for the scan although as we all know any wait is too long

Buns, so sorry to hear about your mum. I hope you are in a better place to deal things although it's so not the news you wanted to hear.

Malteserzz, as a parent looking in, the time leading up to Christmas in schools always seems so much fun so I'm glad you're able to experience it although it must be completely exhausting. Enjoy your relaxing weekend.

Foo good luck with the diet - come the new year I might be asking you for some tips! - and woo hoo for joining the gym. You go girl!

Speedy good to hear that you are able to do more but make sure you don't overdo things, easier said Than done I know. It must be frustrating wanting to do things but having to pay the price for it later.

Marshy, ow for the sciatica and lack of sleep. Hope it improves soon and well done for taking the step towards counselling and ADs. If you're like me (and probably everyone else on here) I'm finding this a tough road to follow and there's only so much I can deal with on my own.

Hi to everyone, sorry if I've missed anyone out. Enjoy your weekends!

Minty glad they looked after you yesterday. Hopefully by now you will be looking all glam and I hope you have a lovely time at the party

minty I had chemo on day prior to Xmas Eve last year (AC). Was very anxious beforehand about Xmas Day, which was just 4 of us at home.

It all went off fine. I even cooked the dinner. (And managed to wrap all the Santa presents on Xmas Eve!!!)

I slumped the following two days...
You will be fine! xx

Can anyone recommend a good yet soft bra for after the op? The nurse suggested getting a sports bra but I've only ever had one and as I am quite big up top it was a hell of a battle to get in it. I don't fancy attempting it with stitches, it'd take an entire can of WD40 at the least.

Any suggestions would be gratefully received.

I felt the same about sports bras, the ones I have are far too tight to be battling into after surgery, even in a bigger size. I ended up in M&S a few days post op trying on a 36 instead of 34 DD and E non wired selection. I had bought one in advance but got a couple more. Can't recommend a particular style, just their boring non wired ones in a box. I didn't wear them for more than a couple of weeks, but I did wear them in bed for night time support for quite a while as that was quite painful I remember.

Morning all.

I got my bras from M&S saveme as recommended by my BCN. (and there's 20% off till Monday with the code NOV14AB)!

Hope your mum is doing ok buns.

I know what you mean about loving the build up to Christmas at school but being shattered malt, I'm really enjoying it but trying to teach 60 4 year olds to line dance together for the Nativity (don't ask ) does take it out of a girl!

Good luck with the cutting down foofoo, I'm also trying to get fitter and lose a few pounds but finding it really tough as I'm so shattered all the time (and there are so many goodies in the house at this time of the year) OK who am I kidding, at all times of the year!

Hope you had a lovely time at the party Minty and enjoyed being pampered.

Thinking of you and sending huge hugs becca

Hope I haven't missed anyone, hope everyone has a quiet SE free Sunday.

I got these saveme www.marksandspencer.com/2-pack-non-wired-crop-bras/p/p20138158

They were lovey and soft but as I'd had a bmx, support wasn't an issue so not sure if they'll be right for you.

Save me I had a couple of front fastening soft bras from an old lady company online, I can't remember the name sorry. I also had those bra/crop top things you can buy anywhere they were really comfy. A front fastening shirt is a good idea to take into hospital to come home in so you don't have to lift your arms above your head

Wine the line dancing sounds great

Just quickly re: bras, I got some front fastening soft ones from john Lewis which served me very well. I couldn't have done up a normal one round the back and the ones I got did up with press studs (sexy!) which was super easy

Saveme I bought a Royce post op bra and also someone suggested the sports bra from m&s. I couldn't do anything up at the back so it was front fastening for me (bmx with recon) and am still in them now but will be until after next op. I found I had to go to a 40 from a 34/36 in the sports bra to ensure it was comfy.

Minty. Hope you had a wonderful time and what a lovely thing for your husband to do.

Was invited to lunch by a friend from work which was lovely. Came home very full!

Malt. Glad you are enjoying the Xmas prep. Am missing it in a way but am gearing up to begin to get back to work in Dec! No teaching as such and have been told to only do as much as I can; getting to know the children etc. looking forward to it but also quite nervous as well.