**Tamoxigang counting down to Easter eggs- thread 48**

[BetsyBoop]

throws some hot cross buns on the trolley

Hello. I am a potential newcomer! have found a breast lump and it feels big. There has been a lot of cancer in my family without good outcomes so I'm feeling pretty anxious about this.

I have a holiday booked for 10 days after the scan/biopsy date. My mums supposed to be meeting is on holiday and asking me about flights etc. I'm being so evasive with her as I don't want her to waste money on flights. I don't want to tell her what's going on with me as she lost my dad to cancer a couple of years ago her best friend and sister in law. My mum is my best friend and I don't want to worry her.

I have 2 young dcs and I just keep looking at them and getting teary.

I don't know what I'm here asking for really. I just feel sick. and I've been reading some of this thread and feel pretty humbled. You all seem so strong.

Mrs, I completely get it about your daughters and the guilt. Stick with the holiday if you can. A week to play with sounds quite generous, but you may need to press them about rads planning to minimise the chance of unexpectedly scheduled extra rads.

Zippy, big hugs to you. I'm so sorry you find yourself here. I'm glad you're in the system with a planned scan date.

I went on holiday a week after my scan and biopsy and four days after I got positive results. As I have a busy hospital, I had to wait 5 weeks for the operation, which meant I could do the two week holiday easily. It was, to be honest, a miserable holiday for me and DH, but the dcs enjoyed it, and I can't see that I would have been happier at home.

I'm not sure what to suggest about your mum. I understand you protecting her until you have better information, but she is your mum and might want to know anyway so she can support you.

Thank you, I was told on Friday that radiotherapy would be six weeks post surgery but I have read somewhere ( I am being very careful about googling, only proper sites) that its usually four weeks? There is always the issue of a second operation and the potential for needing chemo, but I've got my head firmly in the sand over that. The issue seems to be scar healing and arm mobility. I'm reasonably fit but realise I could find myself unable to move my arm much.

I don't mind sitting in the shade if it means everyone gets a much deserved holiday. I just not know how far I can push it re insurance and cancelling and short of ringing my insurance company I guess it impossible to know.

I think I'll call my bc nurse tomorrow, suddenly the questions I should have asked on Friday are popping into my head and I need clarification about some things. Not about the holiday, more medical related.

My planning appointment is only one week post op, rads start on 2nd June which is only 2 weeks post op. Does that sound insane to people?

Thanks for the advice wren. I might try and stall my mum for a few more days before having to tell her. I just don't want her worrying longer than she has to.
On my appointment info it says that in many cases people get their results that day! I'm assuming that's the people that have a scan and they are told there's no problem? Surely biopsy results can't come back that day?! This is the nhs!!?!

Zippy, I had a mammogram, scan then core biopsy on the same day then had to go back one week later, which was last Friday, for the results. I think the people who got their results that day didn't have the biopsy because it wasn't deemed necessary.

I had my first lump, which turned out to be fine, when my girls were little, I understand how that feels. They are 17&20 now but it doesn't feel any better.

Thanks for responding mrs. Yes that's what I thought re biopsy/mammogram. Just been reading your previous posts and feel for you massively

I had mammo, scan and biopsy on the same day. I had to go back a week later for result but they told me on the first day that they were pretty sure I had cancer in both breasts. I had no idea as I was still breastfeeding - thought I had a blocked duct.

Zippy, I think you might hear a definite "yes, it's cancer" on the biopsy day as there are some lumps that are definitely cancerous (but we're still hoping, as for most people, that it won't be), and they will do a rough assessment of lump size. You then have to wait for the detailed biopsy results for important info for treatment (type of cancer and grade).

Thanks for your advice.

I have had a lump previously about 10 years ago. I want that worried then (it was before I had children!) and can't remember the what they said the cause of it was.

My lump feels really inside the breast if that makes sense- not near the surface. I suppose there's not a typical place where lumps happen? The lump does feel large like a very large grape. The size is bothering me.

Zippy welcome, don't forget the majority of lumps are not cancer so hopefully your time here will be short and sweet !

Wee that doesn't sound much time at all to allow you to recover, I had 2 months between node clearance and rads which was more than I'd have liked but 2 weeks does sound a bit ambitious. All hospitals are different though, they've obviously planned it that way

Afternoon lovely ladies!

Welcome to the newbies. Sorry you've had to join us but there's strength in numbers.

I saw my surgeon on Friday. This cancer is a new little bugger and unrelated to my previous cancer. Lucky Zombie!

The Grade 2 IDC was 1cm long but adjacent DCIS took the total length to 4cm. ER- PR- HER2+ Also had Paget's Disease on the nipple. 6/19 nodes were affected.

I should be having a CT scan this week to check for further spread and then see my oncologist the following week. Both chemo and more Herceptin are on the agenda.

I was a bit surprised to read that so many of you had problems with FEC. I absolutely breezed through it last time. All 6 cycles delivered via a cannula and only mild phlebitis following the final cycle. It was the side effects of the anti-emetics that gave me problems. But by cycle 3 or 4 I had learned how to manage them so they had minimal impact for the rest of the course. I won't know until I've seen my oncologist what chemo cocktail I'll have this time but I do know that Docetaxel is definitely on the menu.

As for more Herceptin - hmmm. I'm hoping that this time they will be able to give me the injections instead of the infusions.

Love and ZombieHugs™ to you all.

mrsrhodgilbert - As others have suggested, including the medical team, you will be able to go on holiday. There is a recovery period between surgery and Radiotherapy to allow you to heal. The Radiotherapy can leave you a bit sore, but by using the emolient creams this is often minimum, at the end I felt as if I had a bit of sunburn. I was tired. I coped with the monotomy of the daily appointments by reading an absorbing novel, which I kept for the considerable journey to and from the hospital. By the end of the four weeks a holiday and different surroundings would have been bliss!

Sorry to hear that Zombie forgive me for asking but how long ago was your previous cancer? The reason I ask is because I can feel small lumps on each side, near to my nipples, the other side of where I had lumpectompy if that makes sense. I am currently 4/6 FEC. I'm wondering if it has something to do with the sentinel nodes which have been removed.

Wee I didn't know you were like me and had cancer in both breasts.

Fingers crossed for you Zippy. I had a lump last year that was fine and pretty much got told that on the day.

Zombie- hope CT scan shows no spread and if you have FEC again you cope the same as before. I won't be having Herceptin so don't know anything about that. Hopefully you will get to have the injection.

Mrs- phone your BCN. They seem happy for you to call as much as you need.

Early Scan tomorrow so might go to bed soon. Hope everyone had the best day they could.

Mummywheel, I first had DCIS in my left breast in 1992 and was treated with WLE and 6 weeks of radiotherapy.

I was diagnosed with Grade 2 and Grade 3 tumours in my right breast in November 2011. Mx with SNB that month. Nodes were clear. 6 cycles of FEC between January and May 2012. 3 weeks of radiotherapy in May / June 2012. 18 cycles of Herceptin between July 2012 and July 2013.

Mammogram in February 2014 showed new areas of microcalcification in my left breast. Core biopsy confirmed Grade 2 IDC in March. Ultra sound of lymph nodes showed some irregularities so another Core biopsy which confirmed spread to lymph nodes in March. Mx and total node clearance on 17th April.

Thank you for all your supportive and kind words. I feel a bit silly being so panicky before I've been diagnosed but this really is consuming me at the minute. I am desperate to know what's going on and at the same time so scared.

I need someone to kick me into touch! You are all welcome to!

zippys - nope, no one here will kick you into touch because we all have had, or are having, the same worries. This is the place where you can both vent and share your fears!
mummywheel - yes, both breasts and both axillary nodes too.

Hi Zippy, I'm waiting for results of a biopsy at the moment so can totally empathise. I am hating this wait, I'll get the results on thursday. I was told on Wednesday at the scan that my lump looks benign, so I'm really trying to cling on to that - surely the doctor wouldn't have said it unless they were fairly certain?! Although she did also say there were concerning characteristics, so I can't get the niggling doubt out of my head.

When is your scan Zippy?

Scan is Tues 20th. Feels like forever away. Only I had a biopsy about 10 years ago- they told me at the time they thought it was benign but couldn't be sure. Turned out to be benign so fingers crossed for you. They must have felt pretty confident to say that.

When I had my previous lump and biopsy I really wasn't worried. This time I am shitting myself quite frankly.

thank you wee

If it helps those waiting, only 1 in 10 breast lumps is cancer. Only 1 in 10 cancer lumps are rudely behaved ones that can't be defeated first time. And even then, treatments keep nearly everyone going for two to five years, now. Very few end up too ill to live a pretty normal life. So the odds of copping it fast from finding a lump are more than 100-1. Not bad odds. And improving all the time. Brains still panic, and that's natural and normal. But it's hopeful stuff.

If it helps those waiting, only 1 in 10 breast lumps is cancer. Only 1 in 10 cancer lumps are rudely behaved ones that can't be defeated first time. And even then, treatments keep nearly everyone going for two to five years, now. Very few end up too ill to live a pretty normal life. So the odds of copping it fast from finding a lump are more than 100-1. Not bad odds. And improving all the time. Brains still panic, and that's natural and normal. But it's hopeful stuff.

You know what Amber that really does help. Seeing the statistics like that make me feel far less panicked. Just what I needed. I will probably read and re-read that now over and over!