Smoking while Pregnant... (!!)

[Lornatoo]

Hi Guys. Normally a lurker, wondering if anybody is out there....?
My friend (honest!)is 28 weeks pregnant with her 3rd. She's really worried about her small bump. Measured at 26 weeks with the MW. She also feels really small in comparison with the previous two. She smokes heavily, is not without common sence and is REALLY worried about her unborn baby.
Now, do I NEED to point out the obvious? is it necessary? Any other somkers out there? I just don't know if I should 'put the boot in' when I'm sure she knows the answer.......?

Smoking is absolutly addictive.

Maybe you consider that it is not PHYSICALLY addictive (i do not believe that to be the case but hey, if you say your an expert..)

people get treated for sex addiction, shopping addiction, and lord knows how many other addictions that have no Physical root.

an addiction is a psychological or pyhsical need for something/a behaviour.

i owuold have thought that would be lesson 1 in smokening cessation school.

BTW had to laugh at 'fruit shit'

yes, I did AB

Does anyone know.. if I travel too far, will I drop off the end of the earth? Sure does look flat to me....

smoking cessation school....puhleeease

Well I've proved my point in some aspects anyway...I held my hands up and admitted my errors in this discussion....pity same can't be said for others.

Its a turn of phrase [tongue in cheek emoticon]

Perhaps her lack of will power to quit up to now is due to other problems which she hasn't sorted out yet and perhaps as her friend you could help sort out those, rather than coming down hard about the smoking in pregnancy (which, as everyone has said) she'd have already been told about by HV.
Maybe then she'd be stronger and be able to give up more easily.

Meanwhile.....back at the original thread....

Lornatoo..could you help your friend in giving up? Kind of supportive - you try and give up something too (not as difficult as giving up smoking - or maybe it is) and be there for her?

"if, as addicts do, a smoker was addicted and increased their fix even gradually they would end up smoking many more than 20,30,40 a day...maybe they smoke what they can afford?"

I believe this has to do with the half life of nicotine in the body. There's just an upper limit on what you need to smoke to keep the nicotine in your addicted body at 'acceptable' levels.

I was a heavy smoker when I found out I was pregnant with dd I knew I had to stop I told the midwife I wanted to stop she said she would refer me to stop smoking in pregnancy specialist, well didnt hear from them till I was 6 months pregnant, bY that time (well before then in fact) I contacted my gp and strted nhs stop smoking programme and I was off the cigarettes straight awaY, had a bit of nrt to help.
Also my mum died of lung cancer when I was 8 weeks pregnant so I know forst hand the devastating effects and wouldnt want my own daughter to watch me die like that.
My friend is 30 weeks pregnant and she is smoking! she saw my mum die too and we gave up together but she started smoking again when she got pregnant. which completely dumbfounds me! I've told her its stupid etc.. and she knows but she wont stop. It's up to them I'm afraid, only so much you can do, it is v.frustating.

my sister smoked through all 3 of hers and after the 3rd the midwife looked at her placenta and said it did not even look like she smoked - what a joke

I pointed out that I smoked through my first who weighed 6.6 and died after 3 days. My other 3 weighed 8.5, 8.2 (3 weeks early) and 9.13!!!!! Doesn't that just prove it!

If your responsible enough to have babies you are responsible enough to make the right chocies, at the end of the day its down to will power and it annoys me when its not used.

Life is a precious gift, not everyone is lucky enough to have children so why do some of those who do disrespect not only their own bodies but that of their unborn child too.

Food for thought ay

Lornatoo, maybe you could tell your friend about this lady called Dana Colvin, maybe it will get her to understand the long-term harm she might be doing any or all of her children, and shock her into quitting,

The site is notperfume.com

I am not the site owner but my own experiences are in many ways uncannily similar to this lady's, and I cannot even breathe a tiny whiff of someone's cig smoke in the street without getting a serious coughing fit, my lungs and throat were so highly sensitised by my mother chain-smoking around me in childhood (she also believed lots of fruit and veg and healthy diet was important ironically, while she poisoned me several times a day with her smoke). I am now a non-smoking junk fooder (although vegan), so I went the totally opposite way to her, although I know I should eat better I know in a way my own bad habits with eating are something of a rebellion against her for hurting me. I never smoked myself obviously, I was always really badly affected by the second-hand smoke, my lungs behave like I did smoke because of 20 years of this passive smoke abuse! I had lots of chest infections as a child because of it and lots of antibiotics which did not help at all. Our family dr was hopeless and never told her to stop smoking around me, I felt so let down by him too.

Yes I do believe it is abuse, how can it not be when some of us are affected as severely as I am. I cannot even set foot in a pub, or even my local community centre because of the smoke from the bar drifting into the lobby! I am campaigning to get the whole building smoke-free.

My smoke-allergy is such that it has caused me social exclusion far greater than smokers will ever know by just having to step out for their cigs next year!

Not many people are speaking up about the long-term effects on them their whole lives of being brought up around smoke, but Dana is and I am too! Maybe more people should be doing this for the sake of the children.

havent read all the posts but agree smoking in preg is wrong.

about the bump size...i measured small with both of mine at 32 weeks measured only 28 weeks. it is commen to be 2cm or so out. it doesn necessarily mean the smokingis causing it as i didnt with mine, i just dont grow big babies!

hope she gets the support she needs at this stage in her pregnancy

Haven't read thread but really dislike seeing pregnant woman smoking! Just find it really horrible.

I am 1 of 4 children. My mum smoked with all 3 others. I am 5ft 9, they are all 5ft 2/3. What does that tell you?

Caz although I am the first to condemn smoking in pregnancy and around children, and to condemn and feel anger at anyone who does it, to the point that I refuse to associate with such people, I am so sorry for your loss, for your suffering as well as for what your baby went through. I am sure most of these still smoking mothers are in pure denial as to what it does (as you must have been at the time or you would not have smoked). They need to listen to the survivors and parents of the victims. That is the key, people like you and I need to speak up about what we went through. Although deeply damaged physically and psychologically by this form of abuse I am glad now that it has not killed me (although I fear for my cancer risk even now).

I would like to ask smokers, what would you do if your kids complain it makes them feel ill? Do you ignore their complaints and carry on smoking around them as my mother did to me? This is being a bad mother, more so than smoking itself, and you should all at least only smoke outside away from them if you cannot quit. I know many of you do this already, such as LOrnatoo.

Please be aware that even if you smoke outside you still bring in some of the toxins on your breath, hair and clothes so kids can still be affected even by more "responsible" smoking behaviour.

I dont wish to get in to any arguement, but i would just like to add in marmaladesuns defence, i totally agree that ciggarette smoking is more a habit than an addiction.

Like i said earlier, i smoke when i go out for a drink, i can smoke 20+ in one evening, but the next day and days after i have absolutely NO urge to smoke at all.
It seems to me, that its just something i assosiate(sp?) with being in a pub and drinking.

Thats all!

Hiya

I read half of this and it was enough! So i am sorry if rfeapeat anything that anyone else has said but... i didn't see any one bringing up the fact that if you are a parent you shouldn't be smoking full stop! Fgs! It's not only madness to smoke while pregnant... for all the usual reasons. Or to smoke around your kids... for all the usual reasons... But personally i'd be terrified to smoke again (i did before having my first). Purely becuase i would hate myself if i got cancer, died, and left my children motherless!
I wonder if it is worth you putting it to your friend this way. Point out that each time she puts a cigarette in her mouth that THAT could be the one that'll push it over the edge and start the cancer off. Yes it'll stress her out, but if she gives up and feels stressed, thats still better than her continuing to smoke and damage the baby, and dying while her kids are young.
Sorry if i sound harsh, but i don't understand how people can live that way.

JESUS! i just read through more and realised that what i said WAS talked about... and in depth... sorry...

I am happy about the ban coming in, it's bad anough for years hardly going out due to lack of babysitters without not being able to go to most places like pubs or clubs anyway because of them allowing and encouraging smokers, I want to stop being a social recluse! I can't believe how many ppl just accepted and put up with second-hand smoke for so long and I am sure it would have been banned years ago if everyone who has a problem with it just boycotted these places.

I think the govt has it a little bit wrong though, banning smoking in enclosed public places while not banning parents smoking in the home or in cars with their kids, surely that should have been the top priority for a ban?

"Life is a precious gift, not everyone is lucky enough to have children so why do some of those who do disrespect not only their own bodies but that of their unborn child too."

I hope Caz1000, and all those who point the finger at smokers, avoid like the plague caffeine and alcohol, all fish near the top of the food chain, soft cheeses, runny eggs, soya products, and all cosmetics containing parabens; that they don't drive a car or live in a car-polluted city; and that they never miss out on any of their five daily portions of fruit and veg. All these things are harmful, and the difference to smoking is only a matter of degree.

None of us are perfect. Why not let other people battle their own demons in their own way?

Loulou000!

I think that degree is a rather large one don't you??? People can't get cancer from forgetting to have 5 a day! I think smoking is in a totally different league to these things! Except those who drink heavily in pregnancy (but thats a different topic).

i knew i would get knocked for saying 'as soon as i found out i stopped'

and also the' lots of people could come and say they smoked thru pg and their kids are healthy'

yes at the moment they are.
brilliant.

I think particularly in the case of pollution from cars the degree of difference is not as large as you might think.

I'm not condoning smoking but I just don't understand what it is about this issue that makes people so self-righteous and so vindictive.

People get so passionate about it because the damage done can be so severe.

I also don't understand women who smoke when pregnant (I stopped as soon as I found out...), and feel they are selfish and want to shout at them about it.

But Lornatoo, if I had found it hard to stop when I was pregnant, I would have appreciated a friend saying to me "I know you know it's bad for your baby, so what can i do to help you to stop?" and come up with some suggestions where you can be involved. And let her know that if she falls of the wagon, you won't judge her or have a go, you'll understand and try and help her get back on.

Perhaps someone else has already suggested this? (Can't remember and haven't read all the thread.) Although pregnant smokers deserve a good shouting at, helping them in a way that makes them not feel like shit is the only way to help protect their babies.