*TAMOXIGANG* 43 *

[MaryAnnSingleton]

New thread !!

Morning foofoo :) I've just come to bed in the probably vain hope of some sleep, but need to get warm first! Fingers crossed we get more sleep than last night....

In fact jhope all of last night's non-sleepers do better tonight :)

Well I managed 02:30-05:30....

Hopefully no other posts means no other night owls ?

NotJ, yippeee!!!

HI Betsy and Foo - i woke a lot on and off during the night but always managed to get back to sleep so not too bad.

Betsy - it will be interesting to hear how it goes at your MDT meeting. I think it is a good idea to ask for a bi-lat and I would have been happy to have had the same myself but my BC really is too boring to warrant it so would not be considered. I don;t know if you remember in the summer hols i met a lady with bi-lat mx and no reconstruction (done 9 yrs ago) and she looked great - she didn't wear a protethis and just dressed carefully. By having the bi-lat you have more options I think - as well as the obvious health benefits .

Up early, for me, as DH has gone off early for a work meeting in London. He's then got to rush down to Sussex for meetings re his demented DM and stay over and give her company on Saturday. By the time he gets home tomorrow night I'll be hunkered into my chemo burrow.
I don't know why I only get steroids on day and day after chemo but it means that I don't have the restless nights that others get.
I'd better get on with shopping and washing today before the tiredness hits.

I was awake in the night always am, went to bed to read about 10 and was shattered so fell asleep but was still awake at 1.20 I'd love a full nights sleep

Packing today for ds to go to cub camp so will be a quiet weekend here without him

am so tired that I do sleep,thankfully.. today: try to clean a bit/visit mum oh and ring dentist to book expensive tooth repair
Love to all having treatment and to those suffering from lack of sleep.

Yay for Nj

Mas personally I would go cheaper with dentist As treatments change and come down in price so curls get expensive one done at lesser price when you need it.

Boo for insomniac -had good night here (and huge lie in yesterday).

Saw Book of Mormon last night on pigeons recommendation-we loved it. At one point I laughed so much I thought I would be sick. Not for kids tho so was at one very young kid (10?) in the audience.

And big for amber too. Nice to have you back .

Curls = could

Morning

malt my sleep at tern identical to yours. Did manage t sleep again about 5.30 so not feeling too bad. Going to push on with decoration now I won't ave all the time in the world. I really need a deadline to motivate me

Yay for NotJ! brilliant news

Betsy am doing the happy dance for your last chemo. Hooray!!

how much, MAS?! that's extraordinary...

Better go, still at conference thingy Waving to all. Hope everyone has an okay day x

Morning! Had an ok night, DD only got up once but that of course led to the early hours dark thoughts!
Making the most of feeding DD as surgeon has already said that we will probably have to stop. One of my lumps is directly behind the nipple and he's told me I'm likely to lose it.
So, next Thurs I'm meeting my BCN again and get the biopsy results. The MDT meeting is the next Tues.
Does anyone know when they'll confirm the stage?

Mas I would also say the cheaper option - first time round the prep for the cap - making the tooth "post" etc is in the price - having the cap replaced will be cheaper (in relative terms of course!) as that bit won't need to be done again.

malt - forgot to mention I was discussing my steroid dose with the onc (only because the steroids have upped my eye pressure and he'd noticed the px for extra eye drops in my file) He said he was happy to halve my steroid dose as I've had minimal allergic reaction (just flushing) so he thinks the chances of having one on cycle three are slim - so it might be worth asking your onc about that. (A bit late as I'd already taken half of this cycle's dose, but we agreed to halve my Fri pm and Sat am (final one) doses) so hopefully more chance of sleep for me!

amber please can I pick your stats/research brains? :) - no rush, whenever you have time.
I've been looking at the potential benefits of SLNB on my prophylactic mx side. From the research I've found it seems it's possibly worth thinking about in my circumstance (large tumour, multifocal, potential skin involvement, ILC, etc) but need to weigh up smaill chance of finding hidden stuff in contralateral breast (esp as I've had an MRI on there which was clear - but as we know MRI doesn't always detect all ILC) against increased risk of lymphodema (esp as having ALNC on bad boob side - so could have two "bad" arms)
(For everyone else - once mx is done they can't do SNLB, so if they do find something (maybe a 5% or less chance in my case) then it would probably mean ALNC on that side as well, as they would have no way of knowing node status - so would definitely be two "bad" arms)
What would your wise advice be if you were me? (will obviously be discussing with surgeon too!) Thank you

gigs glad you had a good sleep last night -you we definitely due one!

x-posts
to smee

weebarra they told me the type (ILC with some IDC) and receptors status (ER+, PR+, HER-) at my post MDT appt. They still don't know grade (I'm having chemo first - sorry that should be I HAD chemo first, since I finished yesterday!). I had to have an MRI to determine size of tumours (common with ILC as difficult to see on mammo and u/s) - they also need node status to confirm stage - which they won't have until after surgery. SO that's a long winded way of saying you will get some info, but probably not the whole picture just yet. :)
(shout if we use terms you don't understand, it's a steep learning curve at first picking up the lingo!)

Gigs glad you had a better night
Foo foo I find it so frustrating when I get to sleep ok but then wake up, think I must be still worrying in my sleep
Weebarra glad you slept ok, the biopsy results will tell them the untitled grade results but they won't know the whole picture till it gets removed and analysed in the lab, so mine went up from 2 to 3 after my op and I think that's quite common
Betsy that's interesting, they did say I could take less steroids on fec but I didn't as I didn't want to upset the apple cart, I'm not seeing my onc now till just before cycle 6

Has anyone had the flu jab ? I've been put off by the thread where everyone's saying his poorly they feel after it, can't cope with that as well as tax side effects !

Initial not untitled !!

Okay , so I just watched last nights finale of The Big C .
(Woman with cancer comedy/drama)

I am a complete snotty mess .
I haven't cried so long and hard in years .
Even pig/dog woke up and came to see what was wrong with me .

Completely selfish and me me me post , but thought you of all people would understand .

Topsy I've never seen it but I've seen adverts for it, I don't think I could watch it are you ok ?

Oh topsy love - doesn't that come under the picking at scars heading ( stuff you see or read that you know will hurt but you carry on anyway) .

Oh topsy I agree with gigs that's a bit picking at scabs isn't it? I did something similar a few weeks ago listening to the afternoon play on R4 - "Don't buy a winter coat" written by a man whose wife had terminal cervical cancer - I cried buckets, but I should have had the sense to turn it off. So I can definitely identify with how you are feeling. WHy do we do this to ourselves? Here have some medicinal and

are you OK this morning sweetie? XXXXXX

Malt - I've had a flu jab each year since DX - I've never felt ill with it (had a bit of an achy arm the year they did the swine flu ones separately though) - I think worth having - you definitely don't want to have to deal with flu.

NJ - yay for good results - very pleased for you my lovely.

I agree with all the 'have the cheaper crown' advice MAS - I have crowns that have lasted longer than ten years, I've been offered the very expensive bridge stuff in the past - but I just don't think I could bear to spend that amount of money on something that ought to be free especially for people with cancer because chemo affects your teeth dental treatment.

Love to all, - its Dh's birthday today so DD and I are making a cake (its a bit weird because things are not the best, but I decided to just carry on as normal for his birthday, - unfortunately one of his presents involves an evening out with me, so not sure how that will go down - I bought the tickets ages ago.) Hey ho - we shall see, I hope he has a nice day anyway, I've done my best to make it pleasant.

I know , I'm an idiot for watching .
In mitigation , I did start watching the series before I was diagnosed .
And , last nights episode aside , it has been an extremely funny series .

Anyhoo , I think the big ugly crying fit did me the world of good !

KK dont feel like you have to "fake it till you make it"
(Worst cheesey phrase I could think of , but I really mean it !)
If you aren't happy , don't just suck it up !

Mas (former dental nurse here) go for the crown .
Unless you have a gap of more than one tooth , you are prob better off with the crown .

urgh, here we go for the next battle - BCN has just rung to say surgeon isn't saying an outright no he won't do a bmx, but he's not happy about it and she's going to arrange an appointment for the week after next for me to discuss it with him - she did say next week until I pointed out I'd be out flat from the tax (and I want to be fighting fit to make sure I get my point across!)

Ok so my list of pros are

• avoids being lopsided = symmetry - very important to me
• I'#m not planning on recon and I don't see that changing any time soon. (but never say never)
• prevents back/neck pain and posture problems from being lopsided and having huge boobs
• better choice options going forward = 1. no recon/breast free, 2.equal prostheses, 3.smaller recon=easier to get a matching pair. *radically reduces risk of contralateral BC (anywhere from 5-20% from studies although tamoxifen will reduce that risk) esp considering it's more likely with ILC and it's good at "hiding"
• peace of mind for me esp considering how R breast tumour "appeared" almost overnight and had been "hiding" for years and I have large dense breasts making it easier for things to "hide".
• no need for future mammos - saves money and stress for me
• only one anaesthetic if done together

List of cons

• MRI showed L breast clear at the moment (but even MRIs can miss early cancers, particularly ILC - in around 5% of prophlyactic mx in my circumstances they find nasty stuff or the start of nasty stuff)
• additional surgery = more risk (but any recon would most probably involve reducing L breast, so that breast would have surgery regardless)
• potential psychological issues from having no breasts - I really don't think this will happen, I've had months to think it over, I would definitely have issues being lopsided though.
• if problems healing may delay rads? (but risk this may happen on cancer side too)

Any other suggstions for either list?

thank you :)

oh topsy hugs for you - yesterday I was thinking I don't need the more expensive dental work which last 20 years as I won't be around
(am booked in for the 'cheaper' option now !)
betsy your pros outnumber the cons which seems like pretty good evidence for having a bilateral mastectomy.