Hi hysterical
I have no advice for you as am lacking in knowledge about it myself but I've suffered from what I suspect to be herpes for a couple of years, this thread has reinforced my feeling that it is what I suffer from.
Dh has suffered from it for a bout 10 years, a GUM clinic diagnosed but said there was no medication or treatment, his flares up when he's stressed probably 4 to 8 times a year.
I got my first episode Christmas 2 years ago. We've always been really careful and dh had been clear for a while so not sure about whether he passed it to me.
The first certainly was the worst, I cried for 2 days it was so painful, it was bleeding and my skin kept getting stuck to my underwear/pads where it was weeping (tmi!) oh it was truly hideous. I had the flu-like symptoms too. Mine is like blisters and sores,and tends to stay around the labia, dh's is more rash-like with blisters and spreads more widely and concentrates around his anus.
It hasn't been as bad since that first time, but it's still pretty uncomfortable and painful at times.
I didn't go to GP until I'd had it a couple more times I was too embarrassed, but I was getting so fed up with it flaring up. But nurse at doctors didn't say anything, just that she'd take swabs, which came back clear and she said no more - so I'm none the wiser officially.
Sounds like I should get it checked again, and hopefully you'll get a positive outcome from the clinic where they might give you some treatment, and there definitely are lots of people who only get it once, hopefully you're one of them! dh and I are unlucky I guess.
That probably doesn't help you at all but just wanted to say you are not alone!