If Labour get in will Keir Starmer eat my children and my pets?

[OldieButBaddie]

I am really concerned that he is a savage, with Rishi (who doesn't really eat) Boris (who clearly only eats lard) and even Liz Truss (too dim to find the dogs/kids) I have felt safe, but Keir Starmer seems to me to be the sort who will seek out, bbq and eat my family.

Look at those gnashers

Should I vote Lib Dem?

Sorry, I'm sure your situation is awkward. It's just that we will get changes of government, new governments will change emphasis, and there will always be winners and losers out of that. I don't think jumping on a light-hearted thread to tell everyone off for laughing at you (when they weren't, they don't know you) is going to reduce your anxiety about the situation.

i can manage my own situation perfectly well, thank you. I’m sure these people would be up in arms at the insensitivity of mockery like this from those they disagreed with - I don’t see why they shouldn’t be made aware that there are people with non- trivial concerns (which really ought to be obvious tbh)

Fabulous - I'd seen there was some on iPlayer, hadn't realised it was also being shown.

Now all we need is for them to move it to BBC1 (maybe instead of the One Show - and immediately following any Party political broadcasts).

We could have Blackadder "Rotten Borough" episode just before any party leader debates. Then when we all shout "sod off", we'll know to vote for the Adder Party.

JRM would be like a Witchetty grub and stare you down as you were about to eat him.

That's just what they want you to think.

Of course not! Think of the logistics. The local authority will do it. We have a labour council and they've already saved us thousands in childcare costs with this policy.

Probably eat your pets OP, but just forcibly trans your children.

He’d taste of dust and bitter tears.

My vote is with Alan B'stard.

At least we knew what he stood for!!

😂😂😂

Well the trouble is the Lib Dems will tell you they won’t eat your pets, will even make it a manifesto promise then eat them anyway. While charging you £9000 to do it

Exactly. 😁

The Greens will force you to dig up your hydrangeas and plant parsnips. Plaid Cymru will post dragons on all road crossings into Wales.

Can he start with my kids?🙏

I think if a Welsh Binface promised that, they'd be on to a winning formula

We could have Blackadder "Rotten Borough" episode just before any party leader debates.

Colin the dachshund would be irresistibly sausagey.

I think it’s the most sensible thing I have read on mumsnet for a while so thank you OP for the timely warning. My cat is worried for her catnip mice. She has heard Keir is a bit of a druggie so she is going to hide them under the sofa.
If anybody sees KS Lily says please don’t tell him.

My kids would force us to visit the Welsh half of the family far more often if dragons were patrolling. It would be worth the risk of being eaten to see dragons.

Wikipedia suggests he’s pescatarian so unless you have a goldfish, you’re probably safe….

Where do you think he stands on axolotls?

Stand on axolotls? The bastard probably stamps on them.

Makes me miss Ken Livingstone and his newts .

I'm worried about the Greens.

They eat they very things they purport to protect.

Anyone with safe advice?