May kill DH

[ClaudiaNaughton]

He has just "deadheaded" young rhododendron including all new growth and last year's set of leaves. Will it ever recover? Will I? Will he?

Last night (sleepy, in bed)

DH: I forgot to tell you, while you were chatting, I took the net off your celeriac at the allotment.
Me: (suddenly awake) You did what?
DH: I unnetted it. They are quite big now. Pigeons will not eat them.
Me: THE NETTING IS AGAINST FLY!!
DH: Oh.
Me: It needs to be there. If it didn't need to be there, I wouldn't have put it there. I don't go around throwing random nets over plants FOR NO REASON!
DH: Oh. Sorry.
Me: Rarrrrrr, rraaaaaaaar, raaaaaaaaaar etc etc etc

I have just been back to re-net.

I feel your rage. I had a workman who "tidied up" my garden unasked - including cutting my forsythia down drastically in February, just when it was about to flower. Another time a friend decided to be helpful and massacred all my hellebores. They didn't flower for 2 years after.

I have all this to come with DP (just bought our first house together.) DP sounds a bit like some of yours - happy to use the power tools (lawnmower, hedge trimmer) but not pull weeds or anything laborious like that. To his credit, he does say he'll wait for me to tell him what to chop and when. Unfortunately I don't know with some of them. I'll have to ask for advice on here!

He was "helping",Shove

HE EVEN MADE THAT EXCUSE!!

If fly have got in and go on to eat all my roots, I swear I will strangle him with the celery-like leaves!

At first I thought it was a mither having a DP who can't be arsed with gardening but I have since realised how lucky I am!

I did once have to explode with rage at my neighbours at our last house after I woke up one morning to find them reducing all the shrubs in the front garden to stumps which they swore blind they did every year because our landlady had specifically asked them to. We'd been there at least 2 years and this was the very first we'd heard of it. My point was that if our landlady had any stipulations about any of the plants that she had put in to the garden of the house that we rented from her she was obviously free to discuss the matter WITH US at any time of her choosing, which she had not done, ever, and that they could fuck the fuck off. Half of it never grew back and their perfect little twats darling children trampled all the bedding plants I had put in. Within days of us moving out out they were there again hacking it all to the ground.

Arseholes