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Further education

You'll find discussions about A Levels and universities on our Further Education forum.

Original poster

Open days - does and don'ts

101 replies

balzamico · 12/06/2022 17:21

So we're starting to think about visiting unis for application next year.
How do we get the most out of our visit?

OP posts:
motogirl · 13/06/2022 18:46

@NoNotHimTheOtherOne adjustment exists alongside clearing pre covid, dd was suggested to do it (she didn't)

TizerorFizz · 13/06/2022 19:06

@Seeline
If that was the case, a lot of people in my LA and others would have been redundant. DH went to university in 1971 and his parents were assessed as having to pay towards his maintenance. In the mid 1980s, grants and awards was dealing with 10,000 applications in my LA. After results came out it was manic! A minority got full grant. Most were assessed as requiring a parental contribution. A whole myth has grown up around this. In many areas where parents had a decent income, they paid a contribution. Seemed fair enough really.

DownToTheSeaAgain · 13/06/2022 19:08

I'm just putting mine on a megabus to go and see some. Wouldn't occur to me to go with them.

TizerorFizz · 13/06/2022 19:10

I also think DC can work out quite a lot about a university on line. They all have loads of acccommodation pictures. You won’t get to meet many lecturers and talks are pretty general. Parents should not go into talks aimed at DC and take up valuable space. Nor should they ask questions. Nor should they hog the subject information areas. DC should look at labs for science but if a university is highly ranked for a subject, nothing will be too shabby. Get there early, know what you want to see and make sure you know where you can get lunch!

RampantIvy · 13/06/2022 19:12

DownToTheSeaAgain · 13/06/2022 19:08

I'm just putting mine on a megabus to go and see some. Wouldn't occur to me to go with them.

Good for you. My 16 year old DD didn't have the self confidence to travel for 2 or 3 hours to a strange city to visit universities on her own.

RampantIvy · 13/06/2022 19:13

DD didn't even look at accommodation until she had firmed where she wanted to go. Accommodation shouldn't be the first priority.

Oblomov22 · 13/06/2022 19:20

It's a compromise, you can't get everything done, so work out what is most important. I was physically knackered and brain filled by ours, had enough so went home!

Most have subject talks, so you work your day round that. I liked the talks on writing your personal statement.

I wanted to see a room, to see size of rooms, beds etc. ds wanted the see the gym.

2bazookas · 13/06/2022 19:27

Remove the "we" from your DC's plan to visit universities. No parent required.

There will be other criteria in play (prospectus, course, exam grades) , not just the visit and it's time for them to practice being independent and making their own decisions.

RampantIvy · 13/06/2022 19:31

Remove the "we" from your DC's plan to visit universities. No parent required.

Some teenagers actually prefer a parent to go with them, especially if there is no viable public transport to get there.

CouldShouldWont · 13/06/2022 19:40

Do have a bit of a wander don’t let them get too focused. They sometimes get fixed on the big name courses whereas a specialism might suit them better.

My son found his course by accident by getting chatting to a professor who was just testing a students experiment. He was so impressed by him and so interested in what he had to say he applied to the course and has loved it. I think he wanted to study finance or economics or something

Also let them be themselves, I’ve had parents very worried ask me if their kids should cut their hair or wear a suit, (I teach at 6th form level) They should be the young adult they want to be.

Plus it doesn’t matter whether you are with them or not as long as they are leading it. They are making the choice (or should be) so you are there to provide company, wander around looking at stuff you are interested in and pay for lunch. And if they don’t want you to go with them… that’s good too!

CrackersDontMatter · 13/06/2022 19:40

I'm taking my daughter to LJMU this Friday. She asked me to go with her as I'm studying there at the moment. Any others she'll probably go with friends.

RampantIvy · 13/06/2022 19:42

Plus it doesn’t matter whether you are with them or not as long as they are leading it.

I agree. I spent a lot of time in university cafes on my phone or reading while DD went off to subject talks and tours.

LethargeMarg · 13/06/2022 19:50

I don't agree that you can tell about a uni from the website. The marketing teams are there to sell the uni and often going there in person is far more revealing . I went to a uni open day that looked amazing on the website and Instagram and the main tour etc was really impressive. I then got a bit lost in the town and ended up in a very rough area (very intimidating as a lone woman) that was actually right next to the main campus and it really put me off - I wouldn't have seen this on the website .

RampantIvy · 13/06/2022 19:57

I agree @LethargeMarg. We had an expensive trip down to Bristol (involving an overnight stay), but it was worth it because DD really didn't like it at all, yet she thought it sounded perfect "on paper".

Twizbe · 13/06/2022 20:06

Send them on their own.

I did most of mine by myself, travelling there by train etc. I think my parents came with me to any that required an overnight, but the actual tour of the uni was down to me.

It was good. It allowed me to decide how I felt about being by myself in that place. I remember really disliking Nottingham because the halls were on the other side of a huge field. I asked about safety for walking home in the dark and the guide said 'we give you a rape alarm' ...
Well that put me off lol.

RampantIvy · 13/06/2022 20:12

Send them on their own.

What do you do if they say they won't go on their own?

TizerorFizz · 13/06/2022 21:21

Nowhere around Bristol is rough. I didn’t say you can get all info from a web site but enough to see accommodation choices, room sizes etc. Most people can shortlist from web sites or word of mouth. I didn’t find over selling was an issue. Most places seemed straightforward to us snd DDs. But DDs shortlisted and had a good idea about cities before they visited. No surprises.

TizerorFizz · 13/06/2022 22:17

@LethargeMarg
Why did you expect a university to tell you about a shit area in a city? What’s it got to do with them that you got lost? Hopefully you were not doing Geography!

I think you have to shortlist somehow. You don’t want to visit 10 universities. Most cities have crap areas but students don’t have to go there. My DD loved Bristol. Most students are safe at Nottingham. You cannot take against things that might never happen. Is Nottingham accommodation really near a field? Or is it a park? Maybe use taxis and buses to the accommodation like everyone else.

Cuphalffullor · 13/06/2022 22:24

Look at whole package. Obviously course, contact hours, tutor support. If looking at degrees with year in industry, ask what support uni provides and ask what % of students who wanted one secured a placement last year. Ask how accommodation is allocated, if budget is taken into account. Ask students about 2nd and 3rd year costs.
Ask about work life balance, e.g. some courses at some unis discourage students strongly from representing uni at sport.

Kite22 · 13/06/2022 23:16

DownToTheSeaAgain · 13/06/2022 19:08

I'm just putting mine on a megabus to go and see some. Wouldn't occur to me to go with them.

Which is fine if it works for you and your dc, but they will be in a very tiny minority when they get there.

I also disagree with whoever it was that said to drop them and go for a coffee. I do agree you should be encouraging the young people to ask Qs and talk to people, but , like when any of us make any big decisions in life, it can be helpful to bounce thoughts of people who have some idea. For example when I bought my first property in my 20s, I took my Mum on all viewings and it was great to have a 2nd pair of eyes and then someone I could talk to about what we'd seen after viewings.
We've seen 3 of ours off to University now, and - whereas it is their decision - it is useful to be able to say "I like the way they set the course up at Manchester - I don't know how much you think that matters compared with the accommodation you liked at York" or whatever..... just being able to remind them of the pros and cons if they find it hard to make a decision.

RampantIvy · 13/06/2022 23:32

I totally agree with you @Kite22. DD was still 16 when we first started looking at universities. She wouldn't have had a clue about what questions to ask. TBH she wouldn't have had the confidence to ask any questions at all.

DPotter · 13/06/2022 23:35

Don't get too enthusiastic about any of the courses / universities

I loved Manchester.........

Seeline · 14/06/2022 08:57

I totally agree with @Kite22 and @RampantIvy . Particularly at the moment, with this cohort having missed 2 years of growing up and getting independent, they are likely to need a bit of support.

User76745333 · 14/06/2022 09:07

Send them on their own.

I disagree. Hardly anyone goes on their own nowadays. In fact a very significant number have two people accompanying them.

If your child is applying for medicine and/or Oxbridge then you need to be going to this round of summer open days since their applications have to be in very early at the start of the next school year and so by the time the next lot of open days come around they will already have put in their forms. You really need to see as many of their shortlisted places as possible since a lot goes on the "feeling" they get once they're on campus. DS1 hated Birmingham. Still can't quite articulate why but it felt wrong to him.

I'd recommend signing up to get the email remainder of when booking for the in person open days opens. They get booked up really quickly.

And yes wear comfortable shoes, take snacks and book onto the subject talks asap.

No need whatsoever for the DC themselves to ask the questions on the day. Nobody will know who they are or be monitoring who asks what.

ExtremelyDedicated · 14/06/2022 09:19

I agree too @Kite22 they still have another year before they are going off to uni and will do a lot of growing up in that time, meanwhile if they need support from their family then it's right to give it. My DS would have got far less out of his open days without me there to talk things over, nudge him towards the people we needed to speak to etc and just to generally be there with him for lunch etc. Also to talk things over with at home afterwards, compare unis etc. And I agree that no one there is going to say "oh, I remember him from open day, his mum asked all the questions". If we approached a staff member together and I started the ball rolling DS was able to run with the conversation, but it really helped him just having someone more confident to kick things off especially in crowded settings where it's harder to make yourself heard. Obviously if your DC prefers to go on their own and has the confidence that's great, but many appreciate the support and it's totally normal for them to have a family member there.