Class of 18. No need for new school shoes

[OhYouBadBadKitten]

Old thread:www.mumsnet.com/Talk/further_education/3478916-Class-of-18-now-in-2019-blimey

A thread for those of us whose kids left school/sixth form/college a year ago. Friendly chat :)

Tapas So many pre-existing relationships breakdown in the first term so he's done her a favour really with the timing. I know she won't feel that way now but she has a fresh start with plenty of other things to thunk about and if there was ever a good time, this is it.

I agree that the timing couldn't be better - if ever there could be a good time.

Thanks for the concern and support lovely people. In my head I have written extensive posts sharing every detail of the summer. I'm glad that is all I did though, because hopefully we can now put it behind us and move on afresh.

In summary, two days before school broke up (I am term time only) DH had a mental collapse. He completely crumpled on me as soon as I got in from school. I couldn't get a GP appointment, and had to go private (the alternative being A&E, I was so worried). We eventually got to see our own GP three days later and she was wonderful. Anyway, after a horrible few weeks, all is finally now looking positive, and he is on the road to recovery. He is tentatively picking up work again (freelance) and we are able to think about how he manages a better work life balance.

It all sounds like nothing now I write it down looking back. At the time however it really did seem like the end of the world. I can't even put it all into words now without it seeming overly dramatic. We survived.

We didn't get a holiday as such, but have managed to travel to see family for a couple of days (hundreds of miles). DH wasn't able to share the drive, or anything really. It was like having a newborn for a few weeks again. He doesn't seem to remember much about it, which is probably a good thing.

The DC, in true teen style are moaning about not having had a holiday (cheeky buggers!) but I think they understand. They are easily distracted with some shopping and a meal or two out.

I am exhausted though, and back to school on Monday. I'm in a new year group and have not managed to do anything like the prep I wanted to. Fortunately, I have a great work team though, and most of the planning is in place.

At the start of June I remember saying to DH that I was worried that everything was too perfect and it couldn't last. That will teach me!

Good news though is that DD3 passed her early take GCSE with flying colours, and DD2 has completed her Gold DofE.

DD1 goes back a week on Monday. Her new flat is beautiful, and her flatmate arrives the day after. I hope she will be very happy there. It has come around so soon.

Hardwickwhite, well done you! Try to book some relaxing treats so you can recuperate too. You know so many of us have had to deal with mental collapse or other health issues in family, people don't usually talk about it but it's there. Life is tough sometimes and setbacks help us to prioritize better. I wish you all well.

I hope things continue to look up for you Hardwickwhite

Sorry that your DH has been so unwell - how worrying for you.

oh hell Hardwicke what an awful time you've all had. I'm glad things are improving and that you've been able to see the good around the bad.

Hardwick - great that your dh is now feeling better and hope the start of the new school year is not too stressful for you.

Oh Hardwick that sounds like a really difficult time. So pleased DH is on the mend. Please look after yourself too as teaching is stressful enough without everything else you are dealing with. Hope your DD1 has a great start to the new term too!

1st of September today!!! How did that happen?

Thank you all so much.

Sorry to hear about your DD's relationship Gin. I think you mentioned a few times before that you didn't see it lasting the course. Sad nonetheless. Hopefully her start at university will keep her occupied and it will be a whole new path. Good Luck to her.

Thank you starfleet. We are on holiday just now, and she keeps bursting into tears. I keep telling her it will get better.

Hardwick glad to hear your DH is on the mend.

It must have been a difficult time for you all but as you say he is on the road to recovery now, I hope things stay positive.

sorry Gin and Hardwick to hear the difficulties. Gin I suspect the bf will want to rekindle it a few weeks down the line - that will be the most difficult bit, not staying friends with him (a dangerous stage if I remember rightly) Hardwick such an exhausting summer for you. But good for him that he went to the GP and sought help, so many men won't.

We had a good holiday, some of it in Greece, which was everything one remembers about Greece, blue blue blue, cicadas etc. Lots of swimming. Ds1 hasn't been exactly difficult but he is still showing very little signs of wanting to do his own thing [at home I mean] or being very motivated or sociable. He did go camping for a few days with some friends, and lots of walking. Dh took him to a party, probably the onlyparty he has been to all summer... In short I think he is very much looking forward to going back to uni and having a bit of structure and instant socialising, in flat of 8 people, near train station [?] which is handy I suppose...but a long way from campus..

More UCAS from the year 13's x 2. Dd has an amazing sketchbook for textiles, and ds2 is working on a shakespeare monologue. The dog is much much bigger and enjoyed a trip to Ireland on the ferry (I Hope)

Hardwick sorry I sounded glib about the gp. I can imagine it wasn't a question of him making the decision, and very much all up to you by that stage. Fwiw, dh is self employed and it is so stressful on many levels, although it feels free in other ways for him, he often has that feeling he cannot cope with the responsibilities a moment longer, and I suppose then I just have to remind him that we would manage if he worked less hard or didn't have a successful run of work. he just feels so strongly that he should be coping, and of course it isn't the case that anyone can just be perfect and brave and strong all the time. Last summer I think he didn't go away at all, as he felt unable to after his mother's death, and was suffering various health issues, which he thought were pyschosomatic, but actually turned out to be real heatlh issues (possibly aggravated by stress) But this year has been better, although ds's laziness has been a bit of a trigger. Sundowne has spoken true words.

Thanks again, all of you. Nettle, I think you understand exactly his pressures. Funnily enough DH also has a real health issue, and everything else he had going on was masking it. The mental health aspect did mean though that his GP prioritised him to see a consultant for the other thing, when he had been on a 'some time in the next few years list'. Every cloud and all that! His attitude towards work is transformed, and I believe him when he says it will stay that way. He even went out for the day without his laptop on Saturday, which is unheard of.

DD has returned to uni! She has been home since May, so I think it will take a little while for us all to adjust again. It felt very different dropping her off at the airport last night, compared to how it felt this time last year.

She has had to make a change to her timetable, and as a result has an elective that will mean her having to write essays for the first time since GCSE! Hopefully it will all come flooding back!

Oh and I forgot! We have just done the round of uni visits for DD2. Is anyone else in the same boat? This time we are SE England focussed because DD2 “does not want to be cold”.

Yes Hardwick, just about finished the rounds with DD2!
It's been fun, think she's pretty much decided her 5, just one more to see this Friday.
DD1 only went to 2 offer holder days (no open days at all) - her course was so niche there were pretty much only 5 possible choices so she just applied without viewing.
DD2 has been to at least 10 open days! I've only managed 1 of them with her - DH did one, DD1 has been with her to 3 or 4 and the rest she's done on her own.

Yes. x 2
We were going to Lancaster but didn't manage it. So far ds2 has done Reading himself, and Exeter with me (I think you were all with me on that trip! and Marmite was v helpful) Dd has done Leeds. But now wants to go to Edinburgh, OB, Bournemouth, and the whole St Martins' KingstonCamberwell Foundation investigation too. If I'm going to Edinburgh I reckon I might as well try and get to Newcastle and Glasgow too, but I don't know whether she will be up for that.

Ds1is going back this weekend.Our farewell to him is, at his request, to go the Downton Film (basically watch telly, "out"). He announced today that I cannot expect much from him in the way of London savviness because "I'm an Introvert, Mum". He is trying our patience somewhat in this respect. Ds2 took him to the Apollo last night. The only time he has ventured out to the Bright Lights. This weekend there is the storage saga ahead, he has chosen to store his stuff an hour's "walk" from his new room.

I looked into storage (yes, I know it's his problem but if you want a job doing well, do it yourself) and then opted for the "fetch it back and bung it in the garage" approach. Earlier this week I moved the bags and boxes from the garage to the car to his new flat - it was all much more straightforward than last year because it was all just there, ready.

I am so enjoying the more relaxed and flexible "move" this time. DD is sharing a house with 3 others - they got the keys a month ago and she's been back and forth since so most of her stuff is already there. I'm going with her this weekend for an event and taking a carload of the larger items (she's bought an extra chair and a small bookcase) and staying overnight there with her - wish me luck! (she has promised me they've cleaned a lot since I was last there!)
Then she plans to "officially" move in at the end of the month, by which time she'll just be taking a few clothes and books.

Dd has gone back today. Drove herself but wanted us to drive over for some reason. DH had a pre op chat at the hospital this pm so we’ve decided to drive over tomorrow instead to take her for a big food shop.

Strange questions some folk ask before open heart surgery. “How soon can I start using the sauna?”

I have no idea what to do with myself as we had BastardSpaniel pts on Monday. I am utterly heartbroken.

Ursula so sorry to hear about your dog. Poor little thing. They are such a part of the family.

I saw a mum and dad in Sainsbury's today doing a big shop with their daughter. It was obviously a fresher as it was a very talked about shop. I did wonder how she was going to fit it all in one cupboard and on one shelf!

Ursula Mine is just at the beginning of his life; the responsibility for his happiness is quite overwhelming. They trust us so much to the right thing..

and best best wishes for your dh's surgery.

Ds has been mithering about a) assembling his possessions, b) storage c)times of departure and mode of departure (bus v train plusmum) Downton got cancelled inevitably. I think he is nervous and actually more ready to get feedback from family than this time last year.

I’ve applied to foster for a dog rescue.

I have the time, the space and an almighty spaniel shaped hole in my heart.

DH did wonder if we should wait until he’d recovered from his surgery as I’d be busy looking after him.

Oh how I laughed.