Class of '18 now in 2019. blimey.

[OhYouBadBadKitten]

hang on....

I would like to know as well.

There's someone asking on the FB group. Seems the long winded form is worth completing just in case they are eligible.

Hello! Haven't been on for absolutely ages because I wasn't sure I could contribute much. DD is still loving her job, which we are so relieved (in a slightly surprised way) about. She even got an award this week. Her MH is up and down - so MsAD I do know how hard it is to support a child through these times. Her psychiatrist believes that her MH problems are caused by a hormone deficiency (one of the hormones that helps you deal with stress) and a vitamin D deficiency - but we had to chase and chase and chase her to do the flipping tests to determine whether this is the case. The last one only went off last week. All this time she hasn't been on any ADs because they would have affected the test results. I am hoping and praying that the test results show a deficiency of some kind, because that means that it is relatively simple to fix, and also that she can get on some ADs in the meantime to even out her mood. I also know that I need to get some help for myself - what we've been through with her has affected me so much and the tears are a bit too close to the surface. Had to go on a course at work about MH and had a panic attack.

Wow, that was a lot of off-loading. Hope all you guys are well. Lonicera how are things your end? Marmite - delighted to hear that you are nearing the end of your treatment. Kitten it makes me happy that you are still keeping the gang together. MsAD please feel free to ask me anything and you're always welcome to PM me if it would help.

Lots and lots of love to all of you.

chocolateworshipper good to hear from you. I hope she's able to get some answers from the blood tests.

Thanks UrsulaPandress he's coming home soon for reading week, so I'll suggest he has a look.

Chocolate glad to see you, that is brilliant about the job going so well. Ds1 had (as I am sure I've bored everyone on here to tears telling them) serious vitamin D deficiency in Year 12 this time of year, brewing I think for some months, years even. He was fine with structure (ie classes), but had no motivation or coping strategies for anything else, limp lethargic and irritable... A few heavy duty supplements and he felt so much better. As you say, knowing that is the problem is such a relief. In his case no ADs were needed. He is still high risk for deficiency and it is difficult to find out, as the GP now says they refuse to test anymore, and just advise supplementing (but you never quite know how much to give day in day out) Like you I find it difficult to chase him to test in the first place, and I just rely on giving him a 10,000 slug (one capsule) whenever I see him (approx once a month) not ideal.

Chocolate I forgot to say, all sympathy for you with the panic attack. I find the weirdest things make me well up about ds2(ASD) although he is so so fine now, someone talking to me about "art therapy" for anxious people in general, made me well up. (ds2 used to find the art homework at his secondary very difficult and used to scream and cry over it and the incongruety of it being "therapy" of any kind, just set me off.. I think deep down we feel so so angry that our children are suffering and that is the first step, to let go of that burden.

Welcome back Chocolate! The group keeps itself together :) You poor soul though, panic attacks are horrid. Have you got some good coping techniques for if they hit? When do the results come back?

We all take 3000 units of vit d every day. I was low in Vit d a few years ago and took 10k a day through that winter. Come to think of it, maybe I should be upping my dose.

Good to see you Chocolate and glad DD enjoying work. Really hope the blood tests show conclusively what to do.

Welcome back Chocolate
Anxiety sucks doesn't it.
DD had a Christmas temp job that she absolutely loved, but wasn't kept on. She has been struggling to get another job since then. At least she is getting plenty of interviews, and second interviews, but falling at the final hurdle.

She had a trial shift in a shop yesterday but hated it. She has firmed her university choice and went to an offer holder's day last week. She was worried that she might have made the wrong choice, but by the end of the day was happy to feel that she had made the right choice.

Chocolate - so great that your dd is enjoying her job. Hopefully her test results will be useful.

Ds will be home in less than month - yay!
He will be home for 5 weeks which will be great as once he goes back in April he will probably not be home until September. He has a job working in Finance in Austria for two months in the summer (provided his work permit is sorted - thank you Brexit!) which should be useful experience and good for his German.

Fantastic all round Shanghai!

DD is on her way home for a couple of days. I'm looking forward to seeing her very much, but will have to bite my tongue because she was supposed to be looking at flats for next year last Sunday and again today. I know she didn't see any on Sunday, and she can't have seen more that two today due to timings with other things. I am both furious and worried for her. I suspect her flat mate to be is a little flaky, and since there is only the two of them, I suspect it may all fall apart at the last moment. DH and I both had nightmare-worthy student flats and so neither of us have the reserves to shrug and say it will all be ok.

I'll concentrate on deep calm breaths and focus on being happy to see her - at least till she's had some sleep.

She does appear calm and happy. I know from bitter experience though, that that is often the mask she wears prior to massive meltdown and depression. Fingers crossed DH and I are wrong, and it will all be fine!

Fingers crossed for her Hardwick. It will be lovely to see her I'm sure. Is it a planned visit?

HardwickWhite hopefully you'll have more of a sense of how she really is when you see her.

DS1 is back for 10 days (reading week). He looks as well as I have ever seen him, which is lovely. Very thankful that the GP practice at his university seems to be proactive and on top of things. Student support have been extremely helpful so far.

ds1 has been quite "irritating" about his accommodation next year, very head in the sand one minute and then extreme decisions the next. However, I would say that two people will find it easier to fit into a bigger flat at the last minute - perhaps filling spaces that others have at the last minute vacated? The thing is, we cannot know what the social permutations that affect their flat decisions are. In ds's case he was waiting for the right people to make the decisions for him. He wants nothing more than to be part of a group so the flat is really about that rather than my ideas of "convenience". I wanted him to live near campus and he has chosen somewhere even farther away than this year. But it has all fallen into place, and the deposit is down two weeks ago. Much later than I imagine most of your dcs decided or booked. He is sharing with seven people!! luckily it is a halls flat.

I was talking to someone yesterday who mentioned that living out of halls is entirely different, the same people put in a private house with a scuzzy kitchen socialise differently than those people did in halls, and in fact houses don't necessarily stay party central, but turn into retreats from socialising, and can be ominously quiet at times. He was a shy person so had thought that living in a house with others would guarantee a sociable existence, but it doesn't necessarily. the sociability, his mother said to me, was more likely to be generated by joining societies or sporting groups or what he hated, clubbing. The whole "roast dinner" school of socialising didn't necessarily follow from sharing with others in a big house.

I'm looking already at courses for dd and ds2. It seems even more bewildering second time around. Edinburgh could be a good fit for dd, if she did something art based, but then the distance from London! Reading is so near for ds1 who has ASD but then he could hate it if it was too hearty..It is like the box of chocolates just got that bit more ginormous and you can only choose two chocolates!!

It is funny to hear about "reading weeks" as far as I can see there is no such expectation of reading as opposed to "doing". Ds is given long lists of activities he is expected to do, concert going, and choirs. My husband is a bookseller and he handled a very obscure and erudite Victorian book yesterday from another bookseller, which ironically had on its flyleaf "Withdrawn" from ds's very own university library (the library there is about 170 years old)..I should think so, I cannot imagine ds or his friends reading it...it is in French for a start....and the lettres of someone or other.. I love university libraries - they have this numinous feeling.

I am dog sitting the last few days. Quite stressful as dog insists on sleeping in my bedroom. And starts prodding me at sunrise. The cats hate it, not surprisingly and are through what ds2 calls "airlocks", a series of doors compartmentalising their territority (sadly, the utility room is all that remains)

Yes, DD’s visit is planned! It is a sort of reading week (has a different name that I can’t recall) and she bounced off the plane last night full of beans and tales of filthy flats full of mouse traps. Some thing are maybe not so different from our days! Her face when I said I hadn’t noticed space for a dish washer in the kitchen of any of them was a picture. She last hand washed dishes in Y8

I just had to tell you all a funny story. Not child or uni related.

I am in London with DD2 for a long weekend. Lots of lovely things planned including prom dress shopping in Camden (she wants pink /lace/goth) and we are going to see "Waitress" tonight.

Anyway we got to Paddington and I had my little bamboo cap on. Just a normal chemo cap with a flower.
We went into a convenience store at Paddington and at the till the shopkeeper just stared at me and asked "Why are you wearing that hat? Are you Jewish or something?" Well DD2's face was a picture as her mouth fell open in shock. I told him I'd had chemo and no hair. He just looked at me and smiled. It was the weirdest social interaction and not what I expected in London tbh.

Let's see what today brings with my baldy head!!

marmite. Its actually mind blowing that people say that sort of stuff out loud. I wonder how the conversation would have gone if you'd said yes you were Jewish.

dd has to choose next years room soon. I say choose, but it's done by ballot system, they all get given a number and choose in strict numerical order. It's hard to choose when you know there are x number ahead of you and you have no idea who will choose what. She can choose from old rooms and new ones, ones with en-suite, ones with bathrooms in other buildings a small number even have their own tiny kitchen. So she's had to make a rather gargantuan list!

Much discussion was had last night as to the potential merits of each and how close they were to Hall and local shops.

I'm happy she's bouncy Hardwick. She will treasure those tales of filth for her own kids perhaps one day.

Good grief Marmite! I can't even imagine anyone saying that out loud in the summer, but in Feb, surely lots of people are wearing hats. It's bizarre on so many levels. I hope you have a lovely time! We have a very misty start today, but DH tells me the river looks beautiful.

Had a lovely surprise yesterday. DH had arranged for DD1 to join us for the weekend. So I was sitting in a pub in Covent Garden and she just appeared!!

Off to look for very specific prom dresses today. Could end in tears!!