Class of '18 nattering as they head in different directions.

[OhYouBadBadKitten]

Hope this works. On phone with dodgy signal.

DS1 met a lovely girl 2 months ago and they've been inseparable ever since.

She has a car and plans to visit him at university (1.5 h drive). Once he is there and (hopefully) immersed in university life, his perspective may change.

My worries about DS1:

• What will happen if he becomes ill again.
• How he is going to cope when he loses his keys / phone / wallet / laptop.
• How he is going to manage the organisation and admin. He can barely manage his own diary/calendar and to-do list.

He will get lost a lot, but he is used to that. He still gets lost in his home town, and has been living there all his life.

I'm confident that he can feed himself, budget, wash his clothes, make friends and get on with everyone.

third my worries are the other way round to yours, I’m hoping that DS will makes friends who complement him, if that makes sense so that between them they have everything covered! That’s pretty much what happened at secondary school where he has been the quiet cautious one whereas his best friend is much more confident and a bit more of a risk taker.

Bakeandyarn hopefully DS1 will find at least one friend like your DS.

I expect that DS will find the first term hell. He does everything "later" and we all know what happens when you do that. My hope is that he has organised flatmates and it rubs off.

If dd can establish a routine, I think she'll be fine, but if she's dealing with tight deadlines and then gets admin stuff thrown in on top I think that's going to be a challenge and she will be at risk of overworking.

I know she's nervous about making friends, I'm not actually worried about that for her, she will find her tribe I think.

Goodluck raspberry!
I worry about the friend making thing for dd
I hope dd won’t be too trusting in a place like London and I hope she keeps her wits about her

Lonicera it may be with the disappointment of the Oxbridge fail that he just needs a new start on every level..it is more likely that he is getting away from his parents (the ones you said were overinvested in his success) than your dd...she after all is making her own new life as well this year..whether in or out of university. Splitting up is so painful though, we've all been through it, or most of us at some stage. There's nothing we can do to shield them from it.

That's really hard Lonicera, your poor lass.

Third my take on anxiety in teens is that once you have had a very bad experience, you look after yourself and manage your expectations much better and do what makes you happy and content, regardless of peer pressures/academic pressures. It is a lesson that I think my ds2 who was extremely anxious in Year 7 learned, again it is something terrible you go through and then you are wiser, wiser beyond your years. I think it is a form of self regulation that you learn from experience. It isn't necessarily going to repeat. They are changing, we the parents are sort of stuck worrying.

One more week to go for us. It's interesting reading what other people are worrying about. This is second time around for us. I think my worries are different from last time. Some because DD2 is a different personality from DD1, some just because of DD1's experience.

My big worry is will she be settle in and be happy. DD1 didn't have a particularly happy first year. I hope that DD2 fares better.

Dc1 has been away for almost a week now. It hit me last night. The house was quieter, and there wasn’t the usual chatter between the two dcs.

It was weird today also. Dc 2 was out all day and we had the house to ourselves. That hasn’t really happened since before the exams.

Just spoke to dc1. He seems okay. FaceTime is great for communicating. Dc showed me around his flat the other day (dh took him up).

Dc1 isn’t the most outgoing person. My fears is that dc doesn’t make the most of the area he lives in and the opportunuties, and just hides away in his room. Also, that his job works out well for him. However, he is planning to join the local tennis club, and the flat is doing a group meal tonight.

Well she's settled in. Not met any flat mates so I hope that's ok, there's a couple of cupboards filled in the kitchen.

Two bits of advice - don't leave id in the bottom of a bag in the car. Secondly double check on beds. DD refused to email, website assured us all beds were singles. Arrived to find it is a queen size. However they have provided a mattress protector and a sheet to help

Good tips. How are you holding up Raspberry and Petal?

We had a slightly useless shopping trip today. Everywhere was sold out of cheap pots and pans. I've had some really quite difficult stuff happening recently and bottling it up and for no discernible reason I dissolved into tears in the middle of the supermarket car park. This totally bewildered dh who then had to do the shop himself while I sobbed in the car. So the food 'we' bought for dd is all wrong and it's going to need another attempt at it.

I hope you feel better for a good cry kitten!

my ballgowns have arrived! They all fit. The stretchy red velvet one is a bit reminiscent of a sofa but appropriate for winter evenings/parties.

I returned from Click and Collect to find ds still hasn't got up. And even worse has ordered a burger from Deliveroo. [His cousin bicycles round frantically for Deliveroo to end peanuts so it is doubly shameful] He then said...Mum can you buy me a cider from the corner shop as its my last Saturday here..the cheek of it

Lunch was cooked, supper was cooked, but no appearance from Lord Snooty. Honestly. Luckily the party dresses and the activities of younger two have eclipsed his boring behaviour...

kitten you are such a nice mother. I'm sorry today has been so exhausting, absence of pans is very frustrating when you thought that would be ticked off.

Hope you feel better now Kitten.

Ah Kitten, hope you are feeling better tonight.

I've gone through a few tissues and am home now feeling thoroughly wrung out. Its been a very emotional three weeks.

Thank you. I felt like a right numpty

raspberry. It must feel rather odd. Can you snuggle on the sofa with a blanket? We've got Last night of the proms on.

Raspberry I would have never have thought about his id and I'm pretty sure he would not have remembered to put it in the car. I have got past "suggesting" DS make a list and moved into "insisting". I have no intention of making three hour round trips with something he thinks he can't live without but that wasn't essential enough for him to think about when he packed. Our darkest day was driving an hour to a week's music residential without the instrument that he'd left in the hall.

DS appears to have landed himself the prized corner room, supposedly slightly larger than the others. This newsflash is brought to you by the first flatmate in residence. She also posted a photo of the kitchen, it is most certainly not an induction hob.

Kitten I am all for click and collect because I like to know that the thing is there before I set out for the shop. Like many things, pans can always be ordered on line and delivered. It's not about the pans though is it? It's everything else, the pans were just the trigger.

A good cry can cure all sorts.

Dd has managed to break my horsebox whilst we are away. Grrrr.

This time next week the horse will be back with his owners and dd will be out for a mate's birthday meal before heading off on Sunday. I am working on the principle that she is only an hour away and in a major city with shops.

However she informed me on the phone tonight that she had a tin of tomato soup and some oven chips when she got in at 3.30am as the bread has gone mouldy. Now how did that happen?

No, it wasn't the pans. I ran out of stiff upper lip. dh off walking off when I started crying did not help. Dunno why he reacted like that. Maybe he panicked.

Still Land of Hope and Glooory.

The conductor seems quite balmy.

I'd forgotten about Last Night of the Proms Kitten. Thank you.