Very anxious

[Catfriend]

I go to bed thinking about fostering I wake up thinking about fostering. I've only just had the sw out for my first visit. I've received the report back signed it sent it back but her nothing since. I'm very anxious to get the ball rolling with the whole process. Is there anybody else in my situation??

I felt the same way, couldn't wait to get the ball rolling!

If its meant to be, it'll be. Good luck!

Do lots of reading to prepare, it will stand you in good stead. Read about the attachment theory.

And relax, it will take ages!

I hope it's meant to be cos I'm very excited/)

I'm trying to find b

I'm trying to find books to read but I'm finding it hard to find any!!!! I'm not sure what the attachment theory is, could you tell me please?

I'm sure I subscribed to Foster Families magazine before becoming registered as I was desperate to learn more too. I think it was either £7.50 or £12 a year.

Do you have a link to foster families magazine please Panadbois

Hi Catfriend

Attachment theory in a nutshell according to Bonnieslilsister

When babies are born their brains are still developing; their neural pathways are still forming. When a baby has a nurturing person, usually the mother, caring for them, their cry is answered and their needs are met. They feel loved and looked after. They attach to that person and they are in atunement with each other. This is so important for their brain development.

The children who have been neglected, abused, living in chaos, living with parents who are inconsistent with their care and attention etc don't feel loved and looked after and their needs are not met. This causes their neural pathways to not develop as they should and they grow up insecure with all sorts of problems. They can have problems with relationships, feeling empathy towards others even their conscience doesn't develop as it should.

I hope this helps

www.fosterfamilies.co.uk/index.html

And I think it's cheaper that I said! I have kept all my copies because I can go back into them if I'm looking for something specific.

Have read all the threads on here? i think I must of read them all before getting a placement.

Hi Catfriend, there's tons about attachment theory on the Internet but it can make very scary reading. Its a massive subject and still being explored. Keep in mind that although MOST children in care will have some sort of attachment problems not all of them will be as severe as the cases that are written about - otherwise you won't want to carry on with your application!

I personally found Cathy Glass's books quite helpful (even though I no longer think they are true stories they do give quite a good insight into what life as a foster carer is like, except I doubt anyone could be as perfect as the author makes herself out to be!)

I agree with Panadbois about reading the threads on here - I don't know if the board existed when I started but it's certainly been helpful since I found it! I didn't like the foster families magazine though.

And like Bonnieslilsister said, try and relax! You'll be worn out before you get to panel if you make fostering your whole life before you begin.

Hi catfriend - yes it takes ages, because LAs are very short of social workers and it's hard to recruit new ones, especially now as thanks to this coalition that has slashed all public service budgets the sw posts are "frozen" (meaning they can't advertise them cus they can't pay them!) Retired sw & tm mgr of Fostering & Adoption team here, but not worked since 2009.

Attachment theory is important and I'm not sure if anyone has mentioned going on the site "British Agencies for Fostering & Adoption" (BAAF) and "Fostering Network" which is the national organisation for foster carers. You can find lots of useful info on those sites. There are other important issues too, and try to stay grounded because the reality may not be quite like fantasy!!

Scarlet5 I am glad you have realised that Cathy Glass's books are not true stories and I don't know how she gets away with selling them as non fiction. As all foster carers know, confidentiality is of vital importance and no fc could write about children in their care, either in the past or present. Also they wouldn't have the time to churn out the books that she does (!) I wouldn't advise anyone to read them (although you say they helped you and I know you are an experienced fc) I think I just get annoyed thinking how much money she is making by writing these stories. She has obviously got a good researcher, but I think she is dishonest for pretending they are true and that alone puts me off. There is someone else (whose name I can't recall) doing the same thing, and they are usually found amongst the "misery memoirs" that fill bookshops these days, and many of those have found to be untrue or grossly exaggerated.

Thanks everyone for replying. I've been reading up on alot of fostering and some things are positive and some are negative. No matter what you do in life there is always positives and negatives. I've phoned the SW who came to my house (lovely lady and very helpful indeed) I am still no further forward:( I really want to get on the skills for fostering but the SW couldn't tell me if I'm on the next course or not!!!!

Once you get a place on the skills to foster course you should find things move faster then.

We sent application form Feb 2011, got a phone call sometime in March to arrange home visit which took place in May. From then we waited ages to get on the course and it wasn't until last Sept we did it. Our assessment started November and we went to panel Feb.

Good luck, before you know it you could be sitting with a lo sleeping in the pram and wondering where the time went!

I hope your right tulipsfromamsterdam I just hate all the waiting and not getting very far with the sw when I phone:(