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Fostering

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Original poster

I think we've reached the end of our road

174 replies

EarthMotherImNot · 22/02/2011 17:18

Title says it all reallySad

Since our last lo left a few weeks ago Dh and I have endlessly discussed whether to carry on as Fc's.

Her leaving affected us both badly, probably due to her difficult start in life and how intensely we worked with her for so long.

I have a supervision meeting due in a week or so and I'll probably tell my sw then.
We very much want to see our current lo on to his adoption next month but I'm worried they'll move him instead so I'm considering just keeping quiet until he leavesBlush

It hasn't been an easy decision and I've dithered about it some days but we aren't getting any younger and the paperwork and training seems neverending and often not even geared to our age group.

I get tired of hearing sw's speak of manditory training when we are, in effect unpaid childcare.

I think the last straw was being "told" I "must" attend a course on "managing difficult behaviour" we foster newborns for gods sake!

OP posts:
bonnieslilsister · 22/08/2011 16:54

sending many many good vibes your way xxxx

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 23/08/2011 10:16

Hi again, cancer is in 9-10 places in my breast and also in my lymph nodes so they have to go too. My right breast is so far clear. xxx

OP posts:
catsrus · 23/08/2011 11:38

good luck - I've been following the thread for a while - will have all my fingers and toes crossed for you!

StealthPolarBear · 23/08/2011 12:33

Thinking about you, how are you feeling about it?

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 23/08/2011 14:19

It's not sinking in, feels like its someone else they're talking about. I'm sure it'll hit me soon though.

OP posts:
bonnieslilsister · 23/08/2011 18:13

So sorry Emin, it must be really hard for you at the moment Sad and I hope you have someone with you when it does hit you. I am not sure what to say but want you to know (I am sure I can speak for everyone here) we all care about you and would be here for you if you want to talk to someone not involved in RL. I will be thinking about you and sending love and good wishes xxxx

StealthPolarBear · 23/08/2011 18:17

yes, definitely

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 06/09/2011 13:03

I won't be able to post for a while as my operation is tomorrowSad

Please send me good positive vibes to try and shake this awful fear. x

OP posts:
Beamur · 06/09/2011 13:11

Hope all goes well. FWIW - my Mum had breast cancer which had also spread to the lymph nodes, she's still alive and well 10+ years later. Outcomes for this disease are getting better all the time.
It's horribly scary to go through though.

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 06/09/2011 13:30

Thanks Beamur, it's worth a lot actually, the more positive stories I hear the better.

I can honestly say I have never been this afraid in my whole life, it has taken over any other thoughts or plans we had until its sorted.

OP posts:
BusterTheDonk · 06/09/2011 14:02

GOOD POSITIVE VIBES

The very very best of luck and wishing you a speedy recovery...

virtual hugs x x x

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 06/09/2011 15:29

ooh hugs too, forgot about them, thank you xSmile

OP posts:
CiderwithBuda · 06/09/2011 15:35

Lots of hugs and best wishes from me too. Will be thinking of you.

I read a very good book by an Irish woman who has beaten breast cancer twice. Lots of great advice about healthy eating and supplements and things that helped her. Can't remember name of book but her name is Bernadette Bohan and it was available on Amazon. Don't know if it would maybe help you feel a little more in control?

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 06/09/2011 16:28

Thank you Buda, thats very kind of you. I think the fear is due to feeling out of control IYSWIM. I will have a look for itSmile

OP posts:
Milliways · 06/09/2011 17:58

Best of luck to you EarthMother :)

I have 2 friends who are both back at work now following breast cancer surgery / chemo etc last year. One of them asked people to not send flowers, but a bright headscarf so she had a great selection to choose from Grin.

bonnieslilsister · 06/09/2011 21:38

Best of luck EarthMother, I will be sending you lots of love and healing and think the head scarf idea is wonderful xxx

ChristWhatNow · 06/09/2011 21:43

Thinking of you EMIN. Good luck for tomorrow.

Have followed your story as have personal experince of fostering and you have been amazing. As you say though, it doesn't give you a get out of jail free card for the shitty stuff. Much as it should!

Good luck again, wishing you well.

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 07/09/2011 04:37

Thank you all, as you can see, sleep is eluding me not surprisingly. Not long now!

OP posts:
barbie1 · 07/09/2011 05:02

earthmother i have just stumbled upon your thread, i know nothing of fostering but do know about breast cancer having supported my mum through it. She has just been given her 7th year in the all clear. Like you she had to have breast removed and lymph nodes. I wish you all the best for today and the coming months x

caz2go · 07/09/2011 09:04

Thinking of you today emin ,sending lots of positive vibes and hugs ((( ))) xx

bottersnike · 07/09/2011 13:34

Also thinking of you, my mum had a mastectomy and lymph nodes removed 11 years ago, and is in the clear now.
Hope you have lots of wonderful friends and family nearby who can support you.
x

lovingthepeaceandquiet · 20/09/2011 11:14

How are things Earthmother? Thinking of you x

Original poster
EarthMotherImNot · 26/09/2011 15:27

Hi everyone, sorry to leave you hangingBlush My op went well at first but as the day wore on it became clear something was very wrong.

We have learned since that a blood clot was left behind which caused me to feel unwell and my blood pressure to plummet. It ended up with a midnight dash back to theater and my wound opened up and cleaned up. (hope no-one is eating)

The house doctors couldn't get a line into me and took hours to summon a consultant which added to the madness of that night.

Since discharge I have had to return to hospital lots of times to have the blessed thing drained as it keeps filling with fluid.

My consultant thinks they got all the nasties out but still wants me to have chemo and radio-therapy.

It has been a difficult time for us all but thank you all for your good wishes xxx

OP posts:
catsrus · 26/09/2011 17:31

well

not the glowing "I'm here and bouncing" report that we were hoping for, but very glad to hear that they think they got it all - and lots of luck with the treatments.

trumpton · 26/09/2011 17:49

Dear Emin,

Sending you every good wish under the sun. Rest and take care of yourself.

Sending you Thanks

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