ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRFFFFFFFFFFFFGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[arrrrggggghhhhhhhh]

Just got message

DH (been away for ages) now NOT coming home to local airport on Saturday as expected

Coming home TOMORROW to normal airport

FANTASTIC!!!!!!!!

but at the same time - FUCK I NEED TO HOOVER

ok, run around the house like a looney, jump off all the chairs swing from the lightfitting, then

BREATHE

and get the hoover out

my mother is here and CROSS with me like I have any control over the military!!!!

do you think he willnotice the floor!!!!..

great news at him coming home tommorrow though.. hAVE FUN!!!!

he might notice all the other crap! SHiiiiiiiiT

More to the point - get yourself in the bath and get yourself gorgeous!!!

oh that's a given

AHAHAHAAHAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAH!
oh that is SO BRILLIANT!

Brilliant!!!!
Sod the hoovering - like he's going to notice the floor

and and and and - we got our MQ!!!!!!!!

Get on with your hoovering

is aaarrrggghhh a rabbit in disguise?

nooooooooooooooooooooooo (TRYING TO BE subtle)

You won't sleep will you!

Now we won't see you on mumsnet for a while

Breathe LL, Breathe

Check list.

Face ?

Legs ?

Outfit?

Expensive Perfume?

Kids?

Mother cleaning house?

Mother cooking nice dinner?

Mother taking kids out for an hour after you both get home?

No change there then!!!
Have you got a dry mouth, butterflies and feel sick?

Has your mother gone?!

Sod the house.
Go get a leg wax!

Champagne and smoked salmon in fridge?
All new Ghost dresses/tops/jackets hidden in wardrobe?
All mumsnet conversations deleted?!

Message withdrawn