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Forces sweethearts

If you have a family member in the Royal Navy, RAF or army, find support from other Mumsnetters here.

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Original poster

leaving my 10mo ds for 4 months tomorrow. Feeling like shit.

142 replies

gemmummy · 05/07/2008 20:40

hi all, i suppose I'm just after some positive vibes. Feeling very very low tonight, wondering how I'll cope and more to the point how my beautiful precious funny gorgeous boy will cope.

OP posts:

nell12 · 18/08/2008 11:07

Yay Matthew!! What a clever thing. Now, you need to do all your falling over and banging of knees and elbows before mummy comes back so that she can enjoy seeing you toddle about!

Do you have pics of him cruising gemmummy?

Wrap up warm x

MatNanPlus · 18/08/2008 11:22

Great news GM about your date home, always easier when you have it in your mind.

coal fire & cream carpet ... your mum is brave

Ah the weather, i have escaped all the wet stuff by working in roasting Sicily since April and not looking forward to 5 wks of UK ick in Sept.

Original poster

gemmummy · 19/08/2008 08:41

kerryk, my quarter is also at the top of a hill, where abouts are you? (long shot i know lol) i'm off to san carlos today when i have finished my night shift, for any of you that are interested there's a lot of old stuff around that area from the war. there are argentine cemeteries, as well as a lot of memorials from our guys too. apparantly it's all very moving and thought provoking so i'll let you know how it goes. i also think it's where some of our ships were sunk in san carlos water. nell 12, no cruising pics yet, lots of pictures of him eating though, i'm seeing a theme develop!

OP posts:

kerryk · 19/08/2008 10:11

gemmummy we are in scotland.

we are just back from normandy and visited the landing beaches and cemetries and it was all really moving.

mumof2222222222222222boys · 21/08/2008 11:20

My DH was away for all 9 months of pregncny with DS1 and also for most of his first year. I was worried that they would have trouble bonding, but neither has suffered in the long term, although clearly DH found it very hard at the time. (He was deployed on a sub and although we visited him a couple of times, there was next to no communication as they were deep a lot). Now DS1 is nearly 4 and Daddy is the best thing since sliced bread - and it has always been that way. He still goes away but recently it has only been for a week or so at a time, and neither of my DSs has issues with it. They are happy and secure.

When DS1 was nearly 2 we met Daddy in Dubai about 2/3 months after he'd left. The boat was late in so we'd been at the hotel for 2 days by the time he arrived. DS1 saw him before I did and ran to him...I was all choked up.

Get through your time down there as best you can (sounds like you are coping brilliantly) and enjoy Matthew from afar and look forward to your return.

herbietea · 22/08/2008 08:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster

gemmummy · 02/09/2008 22:25

hello all, just checking in again. my hubby is coming down to visit me for my r and r at the end of this month, not bringing matthew though cos i think the flight might be a bit much and it's a bit disruptive for him. i've just sent a whole box of penguin stuff home for him because it's his 1st bday in a few weeks so his dad is doing him a little party which will be nice for him. hope you're all well, and ready for the kids going back to school x

OP posts:

littlelapin · 02/09/2008 22:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lickleolme · 02/09/2008 22:42

Heh Gem, I was only thinking about you this morning. Its good to hear from you, how are things going for you?
I bet you can't wait to see Matthew, although I think you are being sensible not to bring him over for your r and r.
Take care of yourself and have a lovely break with your hubby.

lemonadesparkle · 03/09/2008 09:49

Hi GM (you don't know me from Adam as I lurk mostly and post rarely) but just wanted to say that I follow your posts and wish you well. My dh is flying out for a 6month deployment in the Falklands 2 days before you leave. He has in his time spent many months down there and my ds has the best penguin collection ever but this will be his first time during their summer. The dc and I are hoping to fly down and spend christmas with him (and perhaps get a little of the summer that never materialised this year at home).

Best Wishes to you, may you enjoy many more dvds and pics of your ds before you get to hug him for real once more. Take care.

Twims · 06/09/2008 13:19

Bet you can't wait to see DH Just think you're on the home straight now, hopefull time will fly by for you

SammyC · 07/09/2008 15:34

Good to hear from you and pleased your getting some R & R, wise choice and I recognise not an easy one to make x Hope your doing well x

Original poster

gemmummy · 08/09/2008 22:27

okay ladies today was my official halfway so it's all down here from now woo hoo. matthew has now learnt to climb stairs (evil chuckle for poor dh and mil) and he had his birthday party on saturday, of which i got some lovely pics. can't believe the weather you're all getting back home, hope noone has been too affected by these bloody floods.

OP posts:

DoubleBluff · 08/09/2008 22:35

I hope it flies by an you are back home before you know it! Good Luck.

hf128219 · 08/09/2008 22:42

Wow! Halfway - fantastic!

maggies3 · 09/09/2008 19:13

if you go to the bear factory you can get a teddy with a box inside with a recording of your voice. when they press the teddies tummy they can hear you say goodnight. i am trying this one for my youngest when my hubby goes away for nine months. i have 3 children and have been through this many times. e mails and bluies are a godsend. good luck

VanillaPumpkin · 09/09/2008 19:19

Yay!! Half way. Well done lady!!! On the home straight now .

debzmb62 · 10/09/2008 17:54

take my hat off to you ! i,ll be honest here its not something i could do it takes a brave and strong person just one day away from my kids and i,d crack up but i suppose if know they were with df a dgm
good luck !

SammyC · 10/09/2008 18:05

Great news, half way already! has it been easier/harder than you thought it would be?

Original poster

gemmummy · 11/09/2008 00:22

hey again, back on night shifts tonight...
to answer your question sammyc, some days have been horrific, i even cry in the shower sometimes but i'm coping. it's been as bad as i thought, but i've tried to see positives and enjoy a bit of me time iyswim. it's nice to be not just mum. however, i would give that up in a heartbeat if it meant i could go home. but i kind of console myself by reminding myself i'm so lucky to have a happy healthy family, and there are people around that are so much worse off than me, and all the money i'm saving means i can spoil my boy and take him on a lovely holiday when i get home and stuff. i think i just know that other people have it a lot harder.

OP posts:

HumphreyCushionsTheBlast · 11/09/2008 00:32

hi gemmummy,
great to hear from you.

VanillaPumpkin · 11/09/2008 13:41

Oh Gemmummy, you have such a good positive attitude. I am sure some days are just heartbreaking for you, but of course you get through them because you have to . Your ds is being well looked after and you are OVER HALF WAY!!!!!!!! Well done you!!!!!

SammyC · 11/09/2008 13:57

Gemmummy, you are doing so well and have a great outlook, I appreciate how hard things can be but only from being the one left behind!.....I am sorry to hear its been as bad as you thought, Keep you positive attitude going and focus on the holiday........oh and the R and R swit swoo....wink wink

compo · 11/09/2008 14:06

Hi Gemmummy, you are doing so well
How long will you be at home for once you get back in November? xxx

mamazee · 11/09/2008 14:23

gemmummy i am full of admiration for you. what a lucky boy your ds is to have such a committed, kind and brave mummy.
you are a star.
this is ds first experience of life and, as far as he is concerned he loves you whatever. he has nothing to compare it to
my experience is that kids are hugely resilient and love happy mummys.

you have 2 very lucky males in your life
great as well that your dh is so capable.

stay warm

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