nightmare feeder - help..

[valentine]

My DS, is 18 months and is a really bad feeder. Recently the only thing he wants to eat is bread (he will eat it with something on it eg cream cheese/humus etc). So i spend time preparing meals for him which I know he likes because he has had them before, and he wont even touch them (this happens whoever is feeding him...not just when i try to feed him, apart from in nursery which he goes to 3 days a week and where he usually eats like a "normal" child"). Clearly there is a whole p[sychological/control issue going on here but my dilemna is whether to only offer him the meal I cook and no alternatives if he refuses the meal, or whether I should then offer him bread. He is very short (2nd percentile) so that increases my anxiety re his feeding/growth.....

[Aragon]

Hi valentine,

This sounds like a good old phase which will hopefully pass given time. he's also building up to the terrible twos and is beginning to realsie that he has some say in what happens to him in his world.

The fact that he eats well at nursery is something to hang on to - he's not going to starve. Do you send food into nursery with him or do they prepare it there? If you send it in I'd be tempted to cash in on the fact that he eats what he's offered there (probably because he sees all the other kids eating) and put in all the things you think he's been missing out on that you'd like him to have. Then relax and get the bread and whatever out at home in the knowledge that between you and the nursery he's getting a fairly balanced diet.

[valentine]

hi - the nursery cook his food - but they are fairly balanced meals. What is frustrating is that one day he will eat for example baked potato with cheese, and the next day he wont touch it..and then will take bread. v v annoying!

[madmarchhare]

DS is 19 months and weve just had a simillar thing. This started up at around 16 months but I think were coming out the other end now! FWIW, I gave two options to start with - firstly, what I wanted him to eat and then what I new he would eat, mainly because, like you, he is a teeny for his age.

It then started getting a bit much because throughout this process he was still eating his breakfast OK, but then started to refuse that too. So with foot firmly down, I removed anything he was refusing and announced end of mealtime. Two days later - BINGO!! - gradually started eating 'normally' again.

[valentine]

HI MMH - that sounds promising! Do you think that eating affects height? I know all the doctors say it doesnt but i cant help thinking maybe it does..

[madmarchhare]

I doubt that it does, I would say that most of it is down to our genes.


You are clearly aware of the 'control' issue, but does he have his own cuttlery? Or maybe more finger foods would help. If hes doing a bit better at nursery, as Aragon said, it may be because he can see the other kids eating around him. Do you eat at the same time as he does or is he in his highchair away from the table and eating at a seperate time to everyone else?

If you are really concerned about intake of nutrients while hes going through this little phase, you could try some baby vitamins.

[Tommy]

Just to reassure you on the eating affecting height thing...my D is a truly dreadful eater - he hasn't eaten a "proper" meal (Unless you count veggie sausages, potato product and peas) for two and a half years. He mostly eats bread and hummous like your valentine.
He is 3 and a half and is about 106 cm - past the 90th centile I think - something must be making him grow!