Anyone else worn down by deciding what to make for dinner daily

[MyBusyUser]

I honestly think one of the most draining parts of ordinary life is having to come up with dinner every single day forever. Not even the cooking necessarily — the deciding. What everyone will eat, what we’ve already had this week, what’s actually in the fridge, whether I can be bothered, whether there’s time. Please tell me I’m not the only person weirdly worn down by the constant “what’s for dinner?” problem.

Can I come round for dinner?

Haha as long as you bring a bottle of wine!

It would be infinitely easier if everyone would just eat the same bloody meals! Youngest is quite fussy and the oldest is pretty good and will eat most of what we eat but there are things that the youngest really likes that the oldest doesn't! 😤

Ive only ever cooked one meal
Not a cat in hells chance Im cooking several, Im not running a restaurant
One meal, several sides salad, veg, carb

I hate it too.
Luckily the household isn't too fussy- not even my autistic DSD.
When I am energised on a weekend I do a great big cook up - usually a chilli, a stew or casserole or two, some kind of bake or large potato topped pie, nd maybe a basic meat base (like just cook up some beef mince that can be added to anything) might cut up some extra onions, carrots and celery for bases and might mash extra potato. Then freeze up, note what I have and can choose from that every day.
Making sure I have rice, pasta, maybe taco shells etc in the cupboard ready to use with whatever I defrost. We note our favourites so I prioritise those (sausage and red pepper slow cooker casserole is great with everything, pulled chicken also great for topping chips/tacos/rice bowls)
And DH has to plan and cook on Fridays and weekends. Whatever he wants.

I hear you. It gets very boring

It’s absolutely the worst part of my day as well. I don’t mind cleaning everyday for instance- that’s all fine, and you get satisfied doing it because everything looks so much better.
It’s the cooking - I am no “foodie” so it’s not even like I appreciate what I cook that much, so hardly like I can blame it on the children…. But yes, they are also fussy (and also yes, we did all the right things like having them as babies / toddlers eating what we were having - exposing them to a wide range of foods etc) - even though they do both eat a decent selection of fruit and veg. The amount of meals that everyone likes is just so little - like a handful of meals I can make so it just gets repeated so much and everyone is so bored.

There really is no other household chore that I find quite so unsatisfying and frustrating.

Yes, after so many years it is like this for me too.

Oh god yes, I'm so fed up of cooking.i actually used to love cooking so much as well.

I really get bored eating the same stuff all the time so have dozens and dozens of delicious recipes in my repertoire.

But at the moment I'm cooking for me, dh plus teenage son who's ND and also really struggling with MH and as a result barely eats anything unless I make his favourites (not being difficult, genuinely struggling to eat - also not well enough to just say make your own dinner). I'm exhausted by it tbh. I've got zero energy or enthusiasm for cooking at all.

I. AM. SO. BORED. OF. COOKING.

Actually a few years ago I had a lot of success with a kind of blueprint for the week:

Sunday - some kind of roast
Monday - something based on the leftovers from Sunday (often a stir fry)
Tuesday - batch cook something like bolognese, chilli or curry. Freeze some of it
Wednesday - traybake
Thursday - quick/easy dinner of some description
Friday - something I batch cooked a previous week from the freezer
Saturday - something more interesting

I should maybe try that again...

@KinfluencerMy friend told her fussy teenage kids that if they wouldn't eat the family meals she cooked, they could buy and cook their own.

It lasted a week.

No. Made a deal with DH and DS that we each take a turn…if it your turn you check fridge, freezer, cupboards to see what you come up with. We had some interesting concoctions to start but we’re in a good routine now.

Never meal plan , ever !!! Me and DH do our own thing for dinners, so often I have soup, jacket potato , omelette or a COOK meal for one . DD is fussy so rotates really … M&S spag bols, tuna pasta , cheesy tuna toastie . We all decide on the fly . My parents weren’t into cooking either , never been a priority for us and don’t have the time to slave away in the kitchen when we both work full time and packed weekends.

Out of curiosity, what does this look like ie do you eat at separate times/in different places? or all cook what you want and sit down together?

Yes exactly that . DH will generally get DD’s dinner when she gets home from school . I eat when I get home from work around 7pm. He just grabs something whenever . 🤣 Sometimes we will all have a pizza takeaway together at the weekend. It works for us .

I used to feel this way even to point of having a spreadsheet of meals on 4 week rotation with shopping lists and asked my DH to actually do the shopping too. But when I got bored of them meals that stopped and now for some reason I enjoy cooking and am being quite adventurous in the kitchen. Long may it continue

Sometimes I’ll just have cheese on toast or poached eggs on toast as a meal, but then I don’t have ravenous teenagers at home!

You have such a lot of your plate, no pun intended. It's no surprise you're fed up.

I'm so sorry to hear about your cat ❤️

I do a weekly meal plan but my OH and son have to choose 2 meals each, then I'll choose two and Sundays are either roast or homemade pizza.

I don't mind the cooking, it's the deciding that really get me.

I'm not someone who really has to fancy a meal or doesn't fancy them on the day (I don't cook stuff we don't like) so I don't really care what's on the plan, just that I don't need to make the decision in the moment.

I decide all our meals for the week when I am doing the online Tesco shop. That way it's all sorted in one go and I know exactly what I need to buy so I don't overspend. I check the calendar for the week ahead and choose meals based on how much time is available each day. I also sometimes check the weather - I don't want to be cooking a roast in hot weather etc Easiest meal of the week, slow cooker curry which takes less than 10 mins to start off, then microwave rice when it's ready. Saves so much time.

When I saw the OP I thought, how many minutes before this turns out to be a thinly veiled effort to push some kind of meal kit service and in fact it only took seconds…

I laughed my head off when that video of Aretha popped up on my FB. The weary resignation and sorrowful face 😂 She spoke for us all!

I don’t mean to be rude, but if you’ve been doing all the catering for 50+ years (assuming that started in late teens/young adulthood), surely your daughter must be of an age where she could/should be living completely independently at this point? Why are you catering for her?

I love cooking and when it was me and my husband, I used to love getting out my recipe books, looking at new recipes to make for the week and had visions of me being Nigella, lovingly cooking dinners for my family with absolute minimal stress and all round pleasure doing it.

I can safely say that having young children has blown that vision right out the water. I too, get so tired menu planning and thinking of meals for 99% of them to be rejected by my four year old (he doesn't get a seperate meal afterwards just toast). I do do oven tea on a Friday which is chips, fish fingers, pizza etc and Tuesday is always leftovers but yet it is draining doing it all the time. We have various allergies and intolerance so things like Hello Fresh just don't work.

I do use chat gpt sometimes. I even get my husband to do a week at a time but he somehow requires my input doing the menu. It's exhausting, I get you!

I love cooking but still found it a relentless chore when the children were younger and do feel for people who don’t enjoy cooking or just don’t have the time. I’ve always meal planned and still do now there are only two adults, I’m not sure how people know what to buy at the supermarket without knowing what you’re going to eat.
A couple of websites I’ve picked up off MN which I like and wish had been in existence when the DC were at home which you might find useful:

https://www.tamingtwins.com/

https://annasfamilykitchen.com/

My approach to meal planning is something like:

Roast dinner on a Sunday when there is more time. Cook a bigger chicken or joint to use leftovers for another meal eg chicken fajitas or shepherd’s pie / cottage pie

A mince - based meal (home made burgers - so quick to make); meatloaf; spag bol (make double and freeze a portion to use for eg lasagne another time) To make it different, use turkey, pork or lamb mince)

One rice meal (risotto; paella or as a side to eg stir fry)

One slow cooker meal eg goulash or stew (make double to use another time)

Chicken thighs - a tray bake if using on the bone; or skinless/ boneless chopped with various ingredients and either a creamy or tomato sauce

One pasta meal - as well as the mince based ones mentioned above, tuna pasta bake, carbonara or some other recipe I’ve picked up

A sausage meal: toad in the hole; sausage gumbo; sausage and mash; hotdogs made with decent sausages

I enjoy a ‘full English breakfast’ for tea sometimes!

Make a note in a notebook or on your phone of everything you make that has been enjoyed and was easy to make to reuse another time. Also keep an eye on MN threads asking for quick and easy meals and copy the links into a note on your phone.

I enjoy looking through the cookery books I have as a way of relaxing and make a note of things I’d enjoy making and eating

I try and batch cook when I can so if I make a curry I’ll make double the portion and freeze half. Anything like pasta and rice dishes and casseroles get batch cooked so at least I get a few nights off. But yes, sick and tired of inventing what to cook. I have been doing cooking classes at the local college on night a week just to get some variety. It’s been a godsend. So far I’ve done the Italian, Mediterranean and Asian cooking courses. Great fun and you learn something