Worst meal youve ever had

[BleedinGums1]

My OH cooked for me tonight, the WORST meal i have ever eaten. It was meamt to be a stirfry with onions mushrooms carrots prawns etc but he burnt it in the oven (blame ps4🙄) and it tasted like burnt chargrilled watery mush lol. So were ordering takeout so i am just curious what is the worst meal you have ever cooked or been served that you ate because you didnt want to hurt someones feelings

I once attempted a slimming world recipe for beef stroganoff. It was basically beef yoghurt and gherkins. One of the most disgusting things I have ever dished. Bless my lovely family they did try and eat it but we ended up ordering pizza instead 😂

@TaleOfTheContinents you have my sympathies re the Sichuan peppercorns. The 'soapy' taste is normal- not expired.
I know this from bitter experience having lived in Sichuan a few years back - I soon learnt to ask for dishes without!

Tinned meatballs with a school lunch once. I remember vividly going to take a bite and gagging as it smelled like old piss, literal old urine. But it was the 80s and you were forced to eat every bite, and I was a child who LOVED food with a passion but that dish stank of urine. I was so violently sick from food poisoning for the next 3 days. Put me off meatballs for many, many years.

Once when we were first dating my DH made me a meal from a Jamie Oliver recipe book to impress me. Except he took a main from one meal in the book and a side from another because he thought they sounded nice together. Bearing in mind that this the the man who lived off of Frey Bentos pies from a tin, soup and Dolmio before we lived together.

So he made sticky honey glazed pork loins which were actually ok-ish except he'd not covered them in the oven so they were like sticky boot leather, and he paired them with some sort sweet potato mash with mango chutney mushed through it. Oh it was vile. Everything was so sickly sweet, I hate mango chutney anyway and urgh it was just bloody grim.

We got a takeaway, and still laugh about it when we have sweet potatoes. 10/10 for effort though DH. Next time he cooked for me he made me pasta bake out of a jar with frozen garlic bread and salad and it was lovely!

My housemates at uni were all reasonable cooks. Nothing fancy , but we could all do good family meals, and regularly cooked together. not too many kitchen disasters.

One day, we decided to make Chinese style lemon chicken as part of a bigger meal. The recipe called for cornflour and lemon juice. It turned out like lemon-flavoured vaseline. Yummy.

I'm still friends with these women 10 years on, it gets mentioned regularly.

Once I made a slow cooker macaroni cheese but I obvs went wrong somewhere as it ended up like wall paper paste!! All the pasta disintegrated! Ex H insisted on eating it bless him but I chucked it all in the bin! Vile!

My Mum went through a slimming word phase when I still lived at home.

One was a Slimming World Carbonara that required one egg and two yolks or something like that.

My Mum used three full eggs and mixed it with parmesan and pasta.

I have nightmares about scrambled egg spaghetti at leas once every six months.

@userxx - that was my feeling at the time. It wasn't even a one off experiment or what's in the back of the cupboard panic, she actually planned that meal as part of her regular rotation (every Friday because she half remembered some Christian rule that you HAVE to eat fish on a Friday). She also believes you don't need to cook bacon, just microwave it for 10 seconds because "the radiation will kill the germs"

She thinks me and my sister were both fussy eaters, we weren't, no sensible person would eat about half of what she cooked. It wasn't fussyness, it was survival instinct.

It wasn't fussyness, it was survival instinct

🤣🤣

I've posted before about the awful food I had while on placement in America. "Chunky vegetable soup" that was a bowl of vegetable stock with raw tinned tomatoes floating in it. Pizza that I had to pour off the puddles of grease before I could attempt to eat. And when I got a bit homesick my workmates took me to an "English Pub" that did traditional pub grub including fish and chips, which I was assured was authentic and delicious. I ordered it, and was served a plate of skinny, dry fish fingers...and crisps.

Another bad experience while travelling was on a school exchange trip to Denmark. I always try to eat whatever is put in front of me at somebody else's house but I really struggled there. The family couldn't have been nicer or more welcoming but I could not get used to their food. The first evening they laid out a sort of buffet of cured meats, pickled herring, a kind of dense pumpernickel type bread... and some sort of home made mustard that was made from liquefied evil. It looked like the contents of a baby's first nappy and smelled like boiled belly-button fluff. It took all of my courage to try the tiniest bit and it made me gag. I must have successfully hidden my disgust because the host kept picking up the bowl and waving it under my face, saying "Please! Take more!" In the end I had to apologetically explain that it was "a little strong for me."

The first time I went to the in-laws for Xmas dinner. I wondered why they'd never offered to have us for the first 6 years of our marriage but was happy to finally get an invite. The turkey had been cooked the day before and was too big for the fridge, so she'd put it into the garage as that was the coolest place, only it was about 7c outside. The turkey was green mouldy by lunchtime on Xmas day. We got served frozen pizza instead - that was burnt to a crisp on the bottom, so we ate scraped off pizza topping in reality.

@Rainbowandscarlett
How can cheese on toast with only one side if the bread toasted be foul?
I get that it would be better with both sides toasted, but foul, really?
Also, a simple cheesy pasta recipe, surely you can tell what it's going to be like.
Are you quite fussy, or don't really cook?

A meal cooled on a camping stove (probably some pasta or rice) from packet. The problem was that during the day the methylated spirits from the fuel bottle had leaked into the pot without me noticing. Methylated spirits contain an additive that tastes extremely unpleasant, to discourage people from drinking it. After a long and exhausting day lugging a heavy backpack thorough the countryside i was absolutely starving but it was completely inedible. I may have shed a tear at the prospect of having to cook again.

On an overnight shift at work once I ordered a pizza from the canteen, and it was a dry pizza base with ketchup instead of a tomato sauce. I couldn't eat it

My mother loves offal.

She used to eat poached lambs brain sandwiches. I tried it only once.

We were presented with half a pig's head, lovingly displayed on a platter, it had one eye, one ear and half of its snout, it had been steamed, Also a dish that smelled of shit, it was the anus of some underwater species . Sea cucumber, vile, disgusting chewy but gelatinous inedible muck. Soup with real hen and ducks feet floating in the bowl. A massive heaped platter of toads, snake soup, fried bumble bees.

Fuckingcrustybread

Where was that?

I had chicken feet in Thailand and something that seemed to be blood, warmed until it started to have clots in it.
Generally in that area of Asia people seemed to like more gelatinous textures than we do in the UK, for instance.

@Fuckingcrustybread

We were presented with half a pig's head, lovingly displayed on a platter, it had one eye, one ear and half of its snout, it had been steamed, Also a dish that smelled of shit, it was the anus of some underwater species . Sea cucumber, vile, disgusting chewy but gelatinous inedible muck. Soup with real hen and ducks feet floating in the bowl. A massive heaped platter of toads, snake soup, fried bumble bees.

Sounds like a buffet from The BFG!!

Mine has to be a pasta dish in a small Greek village made by a friends mother....
It looked a bit suspect and it turns out it contained ..... tinned squid !! 🤢

As I understand it's still fairly popular there....
But oh my god.... sloppy tentacles.....

My dad’s first attempt at cooking premade pizza. Turns out you are supposed to remove the polystyrene board before putting it in the oven.

An ex bf cooked me his ‘special’ dish. Burnt fish fingers, overcooked noodles and peas. It was drier than the Gobi desert. He got dumped shortly after.

I don't know what it's called but something DH's auntie cooked. Turned out to be lamb intestine and lung, made into a curry. No, I'm not joking. I fucking hate lamb anyway and she literally spoon fed me some. I had to swallow it down without chewing before I projectile vomited.

Hours later, when I found out what it was, I indeed, vomited.

I've never had a decent meal at my friend's house. She likes cooking for people and pressurises visitors to eat there.

Chilli done with mince meat, black pepper and a dash of tomato sauce. Served with hard rice.

Spag Bol done with mince, tomato sauce and served with hard, cold pasta and mature cheddar.

Curry done with chicken in a minute amount of curry powder gravy served with hard rice.

There are no other ingredients used.

University. A chilli con carne with way too much spice. An enormous portion of it. And I could not afford to not eat it.

That was miserable.

Tied in second place: Tesco value lasagne (at the height of the horsemeat scandal) and the vegetarian main at a conference dinner in Greece - Luke warm canned tomatoes and canned peas given a desultory stir and dumped on the plate.

Way out in first place - stir fried fungus in the buffet car of an overnight train in China. (not envy).