I don't know what to feed my baby

[Gemedin]

Hi. I have a 10 month old boy and I'm really struggling with what to feed him for lunch/dinner.

Started weaning at 5 months which was fine, he did well with purées and was doing well with thicker/not fully blended meals THEN we hit 7 months and he went on a very stressful hunger strike where he refused everything apart from yogurt. This lasted until 9 months when he suddenly started accepting food again. He also got his top 2 teeth through so don't know if this is was the reason for the food refusal. He has never been great with the bottle so I don't think he's overly fussed about or motivated by food.

Because of the refusal, I feel like we've gone backwards with the weaning and I'm so scared of putting him off food again that I don't know what to offer him! Because of this I have started using baby readymeals/pouches. They are the 10mth+ ones and he does fine with them. I tried him with spaghetti bolognese last week (my dinner from the night before) but he didn't eat much - I feel like it seemed a bit too dry for him. He does well with lumps and bits but seems to prefer wet foods if that makes sense.

I would really like to stop relying on readymade food/pouches for many reasons but I'm scared of him rejecting everything else. I don't know where to start with textures, sauces etc. Does anyone have any ideas that could help me? It probably doesn't help that I am not very good at cooking - happy to learn/try, I just have never really had to cook much before so don't know what to do.

I would really appreciate any ideas/advice/recipes!!

Thank you x

Recipe/meal ideas per age / meal here
www.nhs.uk/start4life/weaning/recipes-and-meal-ideas/

www.nhs.uk/start4life/weaning/what-to-feed-your-baby/10-12-months/

YouTube channel
m.youtube.com/channel/UCiU-TGyA8wGN_gF_kKthYBA/

Other ideas
www.annabelkarmel.com/recipe-category/9-12-months/page/5/

Mashed banana , scrambled eggs, mashed potatoes, cake , rice pudding, porridge , weetabix keep it simple. At that age you dont really need to give them a " meat and 2 veg " meal , as they should still be drinking plenty of milk .

Oh and jacket potato with butter and cheese, you can use sweet potatoes for this as well

I started with single-ingredient foods for the first few weeks so I would be able to pinpoint any food allergies. As I wanted LO to be able to have some of what we were having and I didn’t want to cook anything extra, I had meat-and-two-veg type meals for a few weeks. E.g. salmon and new potatoes, and I just gave Lo some salmon flakes and chunks of new potato. Once your baby has tried and tolerated several single-ingredient foods, you can begin offering mixed dishes.
My LO sometimes had what we’re having, but I usually had to adapt it in some way or omit something from her portion. For example, when we had egg fried rice,I cooked it all until the last stage, took out her portion to let it cool down and then added soy sauce and seasoning to the rest.
I also made a few alterations to our meals too. For example, I cut carrots into batons rather than coin-shaped pieces. Roast dinner is perfect - she loved a Yorkshire pudding and a couple of strips of whatever meat it is.
As a family we enjoyed these meals:
Shepherds pie www.organix.com/recipes/6-months/shepherds-pie
Bolognese www.jamieoliver.com/recipes/beef-recipes/michelas-baby-bolognese/
Chicken tikka www.annabelkarmel.com/recipes/annabels-chicken-tikka-masala/
Salmon and red pepper bake www.madeformums.com/baby/salmon-and-red-pepper-bake/

@Dontforgetyourbrolly thanks! Unfortunately he is awful with milk! He only drinks 2 bottles of oat milk - CMPA baby and refuses formula so I can't rely on milk intake which doesn't help. I do give him vitamins though.
Thanks for the suggestions. He is ok with porridge, banana and weetabix. Yet to try egg but I'll give it a go!
How do you serve the jacket potato? Last time I tried with mash he let it build up in his mouth as if it was too dry to swallow.
I appreciate the reply. Thanks x

@Ricekrispie22 thank you, I will have a look at the recipes. When I tried salmon in the past I blended it so I will try it now in flakes instead. He seems fine with most ingredients - he has CMPA but fine with dairy alternatives. It's just the mixed ingredients/proper non puréed homemade meals I struggle with.
Thanks for replying x

Try looking at Charlotte Stirling Reed’s website and the one for mummy nutrition

My DS is 11 months old. I feed him a lot of the food that we eat but blended with some milk, obviously try to have low salt content.
Other than that I give him:
Pieces of cheese, squished flat between my fingers so easy to eat
Scrambled eggs, pieces of French toast
Soup with lots of veggies that he can pick up while I feed him the rest blended.
Beans (not canned, too much salt and not as healthy), he picks them with him fingers
Milk with peanut butter, banana and some oat cereal
Baby granola bars, they are soft and he can mash with his touch and gums.
The pouches are obviously not healthy, I think moving towards real food will be very beneficial for your baby.

Do you eat at the same time as him? If you're hovering over him a bit anxiously, it's maybe stressing him out? Learning to eat is a social thing as well as nutritional, my kids have always loved sitting at the table with us and watching us eat and talk and trying to join in.

Try giving new foods for one meal or snack a day, then you'll know he can tuck into more familiar things at other meals. Or give a meal where one thing is familiar like bread, but something else is new.

Babies naturally eat lots at some times and less at others, they have growth spurts and teething so a few meals where they only pick is natural.

A bit of gagging and coughing, food sticking to the roof of the mouth etc is all par for the course, they need to learn how to move food around the mouth.

Favourites in our house (14mo and 3.5yo) include bangers and mash (cut up sausage small), steamed broccoli, pasta pesto, eggs bread, all kinds of bread and fruit, pancakes, fish fingers, roast chicken... let him play with it and have fun.

Do you have Instagram? Follow weanin15 and what mummy makes :)

My DD until fairly recently did better with 'wet' food too. Sometimes if we were having something dry or if the sauce element was too salty for her e.g. stir fry, I'd take out some meat and veg before doing the sauce, chop it into small pieces and mix it in to a small amount of pouch food. Either that or a bit of yogurt or creme fraiche. Maybe this would be a way to wean yourself off using pouches all the time?

Chunks of avocado
Scrambled egg
Frozen peas defrosted
Carrots boiled (or steamed) and diced, heated in a saucepan with a little butter and orange juice
Toast with smooth peanut butter, cut into small squares
Toast with cream cheese, cut into small squares
Little cubes of cheese (cheddar, etc)
Ready Brek made with milk
Porridge made with milk
Polenta, either straight from the pot or cooled and seasoned, cut into fingers and baked or fried
Chunks of crustless quiche made with finely chopped mushrooms, finely chopped and pre-steamed broccoli (or other green veg steamed and cut up small) and cheese
Split pea soup made with some smoked ham
Mildly spiced dal and toast fingers or bread sticks
Little cubes of ham
Little cubes of chicken thigh (tenderest meat)
Seasoned baked salmon - boneless and mashed a little
Mashed or cubed white potato (boil or bake)
Mashed or cubed sweet potato (boil or bake)
Cut up strawberries, pears, halved blueberries, diced melon pieces
Large curd cottage cheese

Little bits off your own plate cut up small.

Milk = oat milk
Butter = any non dairy butter substitute

Forget cottage cheese, cheddar, cream cheese.. (Sorry)
Spread avocado on toast.
Try nut butters, apple butter.

Can he have goat's milk or goat cheese? My Dsis had CMPA and had goat's milk formula as a baby.

For jacket potatoes, add some seasoned chicken stock/broth to moisten it.

Have you tried cubes of seasoned or marinated tofu?

Weaning with CMPA can be really tough. My DCs all had/ have it. I used non dairy cheese substitutes (but found some of them had casein ) - you really have to read labels all the time because ingredients can change.

A couple of thoughts - I'm no expert but also have a 10 month old!

Does tour baby drink water during meals? I find that when DS gets 'stuck' that a few sips often help.
How is your baby with fruit? DS loves raspberries and so will often have a couple mid-meal and then go back to his savoury food. I always think the relatively high water content of fruit is helpful!
Some of the things that worked well for us when DS was on a mushy food only phase were thicker soups made with lots of veg (often with a handful of pasta/rice or some toast on the side), jacket sweet potatoes mashed with yoghurt and cheese, lentils cooked various ways until they were mushy. I generally find yoghurt (or non-dairy alternatives) quite helpful and will add them to curry, pasta etc to get things a bit more moist. Has the added advantage of being good for baby too!

Even if you're mainly serving soft food, I'd say it's worth always serving finger foods alongside it - whether that's toast fingers or steamed veggies. Your baby might totally ignore them for now but gradually they'll start to eat them. I found once DS was more interested in finger foods, life got a lot easier!

@Userzzz thanks for replying. Would you mind giving me some examples of the food you eat that you also give him? A lot of the time it's just me here so I don't really cook meals for myself. I want to start doing this and giving him the same so any ideas would be great. Thanks again!!

@DemolitionBarbie hi. Thanks for replying.
I don't tend to eat with him actually and do feel quite anxious around meal times with him so that's a good point!

Thanks for suggestions, I'll give them a try. I think my worry is usually once he gags/gets food stuck to the roof of his mouth he gets upset and then won't calm down and refuses another bit of food. I feel like I'm constantly paranoid about him refusing to eat so probably avoiding trying him with different things.

Thanks again!

@ThePurpleMoose hi. Oh thanks, that's a good idea. So for example chicken, vegetables and mix in some plain yoghurt? Is that what you mean? Would definitely give that a try x

@mathanxiety ah thank you! He is getting better with picking up food and putting it in his mouth but he doesn't usually eat it... he just puts it in his mouth, takes it out and plays with it. Is it best just to leave him to do this and assume he will eat it in his own time?

Haven't tried goats milk because I had heard it was very close to cows milk protein. He does have oat milk though and is fine with that.

Thanks again for all the suggestions x

Definitely eat at the same time at least once a day so he sees you eat, he needs to copy you. And if he sees you taking and enjoying bites he might want some of what you’re having!

@mynameiscalypso hello! Thanks for replying.
I do offer water but he isn't always interested and just pushes it away. I still offer though. Fruit is a good idea, he does like most I've tried but I hadn't thought of offering it during the meal.
Thanks for the suggestions. I will give them a try. Do you mean add plain yoghurt into pasta?
Finger foods - I do offer but mostly he just picks them up and plays with him. Sometimes he puts them to his mouth but it's very rare that he eats any of it. I will keep doing this and hopefully one day he will eat them! Thanks again x

Its a long time ago now, but Annabel Karmel did a book about washing and record that was from baby to school age. In fact we still use some of the record now ds is 16!

I found it really useful as it have you ideas at what fyi give at each stage, how to prepare it and if you're not a confident cook, that may really help.

The other thing I found helpful was to have him sit with us at the table and give him bits from my plate, he'd quite often ignore his own food or play with it whilst quite happily stuffing his face with my food.

Remember not to stress yourself and also just because they've refused a food once doesn't mean they don't like it, baby's can be very funny about textures, it can take quite a while for them to get used to something, but they will keep trying. The only thing my son refused was egg and avocado which he still detest to this day.

That should be weaning & recipes NOT washing & record. I hate autocorrect.

Hi Gemedin, just wanted to say we had similar issues and it was definitely teeth related- I'm afraid our daughter still goes off her food every time a new tooth is on its way and she's 19 months now! But it gets less frustrating because you know it's a phase that will pass - most of the time she is eating us out of house and home and you wonder where they put it all in those tiny bellies! So please don't worry, it's not that you've somehow done weaning wrong I'm sure.

Our baby def had a preference for soft/wet foods and still does when she's teething. I would start by offering what you usually give but as a PP suggested just offering finger food alongside. I found some advice on other threads on mumsnet incredibly helpful- I.e. don't put too much on the plate as it can look overwhelming (fair bit of blank space on the plate to start with so they can clearly see the outline of a bit to grab if that makes sense, got to remember that literally learning how to tackle it is all new) and lots of variety- my little madam still kicks off if I just give her one big plate of say pasta - she wouldn't touch it although it's her favourite. Make it exciting for them to explore almost like a sensory game by having at least 3 different things on the plate- doesn't have to be much of each if you're worried about waste, but they will eventually try at least some of it and learn what they like. For example I might offer a pouch to start with so they don't panic they're not getting their fave, but also put down a plate with half a slice of toast with soft cheese cut in very thin soldiers, a couple of raspberries and maybe 4 super thin slices of cucumber (peeled). Massive praise for anything they try obvs. You can try some in front of them (to show it's not poisonous!!) and make lots of yummy noises. Distraction is always good - my little one still loves my 'yummy yummy, in your tummy, yummy yummy, comes from mummy ' song (the things we do to get them to eat)...

Once they start showing a preference for certain things, you can make sure those are on the plate as you add less favoured items so there is always something they will eat. My little one is only really getting into potatoes now - I think as you say the texture is very dry and takes getting used to. She wouldn't touch them for months but we'd keep putting one or two on the plate and eventually she got there (we don't make a fuss when she doesn't eat it, just big praise when she tries something new).

Once they eat a fair bit of main meal you can ditch the pouches/ready meals. I would suggest starting with sloppy food as much as possible- macaroni cheese is a firm fave here! Pasta needs to be soft and anything like spaghetti cut up in small chunks. I make pasta with salmon, lemon and tarragon (white sauce, bottled lemon juice and dried tarragon - keep adding the latter two until it tastes nice - couldn't be easier - shove some salmon fillet in the oven for 25 minutes, add cooked frozen broccoli and peas - you can eat it and just give the baby a little bit of saucy pasta, some salmon flakes and well boiled veg mashed slightly with a fork as you're serving up). Lasagne might be better to start with than spag bol as more sloppy with 2 sauces.

Hope this big rant helps- basically don't feel bad or scared to try again, totally normal!

@Gemedin It sounds like you're doing the right things by offering water and finger foods and that your DS is doing the right thing in terms of exploring it all! Re pasta, I will often add yoghurt to sauces to make them a bit creamier so will mix yoghurt with pesto or with mushed up butternut squash to create a more slippery sauce which was easier for DS to eat.

I really like the BBC Good Food website for recipes as lots are quite easy to follow. You don't need to pick weaning recipes either. So, for example, DS is having this today: www.bbcgoodfood.com/recipes/cauliflower-potato-curry

I left out the salt/pepper and chilli but otherwise made it as is. I've kept the chunks big and the curry fairly dry so he can pick it up but for yourself DS, you could cook it a bit more so it breaks down and maybe add some more water/yoghurt so it's a bit mushy?

One of the best things I read about weaning was not to look at the intake at a particular meal or even a day but look at it during the course of a week or so. There will be meals/days where baby eats lots and meals/days where baby doesn't it but it will generally balance itself out. It's only human after all not to feel the same level of hunger for every meal! This means that I try not to stress too much if, for example, DS throws all his porridge on the floor one morning because I know he's had a decent dinner the night before!

Hi @YorkshireParentalPerson thanks for this! I will look for the book. I'm not a confident cook at all which doesn't help the situation. I usually just make myself toast or a quick bowl of pasta so really not used to cooking proper meals.
Thanks, I will try not to stress so much over it. I just want to make sure I'm doing it right and that he is trying a wide variety of foods. I'll keep going with this. Thanks again.