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Original poster

The MN food guilt phenomenon

362 replies

emkana · 21/11/2006 16:07

Tonight I am serving my children

Bird's Eye chicken dippers
Bird's Eye fish fingers
McCain Oven chips
Broccoli
Heinz Baked Beanz

I feel that my mind has been twisted so much that I actually feel bad at producing such a "poor" dinner. But that's silly, isn't it? I mean it's 100 % chicken breast (plus batter, 100 % cod (plus batter), potatoes and sunflower oil...

OP posts:
WideWebWitch · 22/11/2006 18:48

Cod's endangered innit, wot a shame!

TheHighwayCod · 22/11/2006 18:49

ahem in the paper otday there was an article abotu fish being CLeverer Than You THink

iota · 22/11/2006 18:55

if fish are so clever, how come they can't ride a bicycle?

tortoiseshell · 22/11/2006 19:02

Re fussy eaters - I didn't eat school dinner from first day in reception till leaving Year 6. Except once, when we had hot dogs for main course and doughnuts and milk for pudding. Hated school dinners, but my parents considered lunch the main meal of the day, so would have a sandwich for tea.

My brother would only eat mince and mashed potato and bananas for 3 years. My cousin only ate bananas.

Ds1 is horrifically fussy (and I've written posts ad nauseum on here about him). I have to consider baked beans as a vegetable . There is no way I can get 5 portions of f&v into him. I just do my best, and some days are better than others. I reckon on 3 or 4 - grapes at playtime at school, peas and baked beans with tea, and a glass of OJ. Won't eat any other fruit or veg. Won't eat sauces. Dd eats about 10 portions of fruit and veg. Yesterday she ate 3 apples, 2 oranges, grapes, a banana, some avocado, peas, carrots - just the way she is.

Agree most of us are doing our best. And I think fish fingers are fantastic - apart from mince and sausages they are the only meat product ds1 eats, so I do get the best I can. Don't have to worry about chicken nuggets - he won't eat them anyway.

Papillon · 22/11/2006 19:04

wow so all buff swimmers are actually intelligent as well as coordinated!

well I´ll be...

FrannyandZooey · 22/11/2006 19:06

"am part of the 10/10 so exempt really from such mundane issues"

Paps you are making me ROFL and I don't even really know what you mean

WeaselMum · 22/11/2006 19:10

ok - here's one for everyone that always jumps in and says "don't judge" (usually with good reason, I know)

DP saw a young woman with a baby in a buggy - obviously don't know if the baby was hers. Baby was prob about 9 months old. Woman was munching on a Curly Wurly. The baby started grizzling and holding out his hands for some. Woman said (in v irritated voice) "oh shurrup, you've had yours already".

When the baby didn't stop crying, she started breaking off bits of her Curly Wurly and handing it over.

Am I really really so awful to judge her?

I know you're going to say she probably had mountains of organic veg at home, aren't you...

Papillon · 22/11/2006 19:14

Exempt from the MN food guilt phenomenon silly!

Thought you would be able to make some sense of me by now

swifter · 22/11/2006 19:15

i'm scared

ShinyHappyStarOfBethlehem · 22/11/2006 19:30

WWW, you can't declare yourself 'not smug'.. other people have to tell you whether you sound smug.. or not.

And to put you out of your misery, yes you do!

moondog · 22/11/2006 20:09

Ah WWW,you can always be relied on as (virtually) a lone voice of reason on these threads.
So measured and logical.

That's why I missed ya kiddo,so damned much when you took your MN furlough.

handlemecarefully · 22/11/2006 20:13

Umm she is a tad more ....measured than you Moondog , but then that's why - in a perverse sort of way - we missed you when you went off on your furlough too

moondog · 22/11/2006 22:15

I didn't go on furlough! Well,not intentionally.
My laptop was stuffed.
It was hell I tell ya!

drosophila · 23/11/2006 08:15

I grew up on a largely organic farm. My Dad would use the 'manure'generated by the Dairy cows to fertilise the veg and he would often have one of our own beasts butchered and deep frozen to feed us with. He never used weedkiller and as kids we spent many hours on our hands and knees pulling up weeds by our hands.

We knew where our food came from all right and we knew how they had been treated (pretty good until we buthchered them). We had all our own eggs too. For me it's not so much about how the animals are treated (having seen the harsh realities of farming can toughen you up in that respect) but more to do with taste. Having said all that I was the fussiest eater and skinnest eater alive and didn't develop my 'foodie' qualities until my teens. Had my Mum given me waht I liked to eat (roast dinner and gravy) I would deffo have eaten more but she didn't so I didn't. It's not about too much choice it's about using food as a control, super tasters, bad relationship with food (allergies) crap cooking and having beeter things to spend your time on.

Bozza · 23/11/2006 08:45

at hmc. I was actually thinking the same as moondog though that I was glad to see www back on threads like this. One of the things that really irritates me about threads like this is being made out to be strange for trying to feed my children well.

EllieChocolateOrange · 23/11/2006 09:00

i was brought up in africa. we ate all organic veg, but (virtually) our only protein was tinned luncheon meat, tinned corned beef, tinned tuna - which we ate every single day for 10 years! My husband gew up in sri lanka, nothing processed, no sweets (no dentist either, so terrible teeth!) but, in his opinion, he was still undernourished (all his relations who were brought up here are much taller). So really, as long as the diet is balanced - enough vitamins, protein, fibre etc. - that's all that matters to me.

That's my contribution to the 'discussion'.

HOWEVER, i think in general in this country, we spend too much time worrying about the details when the 'big picture' (do your kids have happy, fulfilled parents who are teaching them how to be considerate of others, how not to be monumentally selfish etc etc?) is WAY more important. [can't find a smiley for 'looking all self righteous'!]

i LOVE food (pretty much everything classed here as 'good' and 'bad') and i don't think it is unimportant. But sometimes, PERHAPS, we do get a LITTLE too hung up on it all...

drosophila · 23/11/2006 09:06

'One of the things that really irritates me about threads like this is being made out to be strange for trying to feed my children well.' i don't think it's strange to feed you child well nor do I think it strage to feed your child Nuggets and Chips. What I do think is strange is the need to be SOOOOO Judgemental of people who are a little more relaxed about food and not soooo hung up.

I think a child's relationship with food is probably more important than what yo actually feed them. I have one sister who was anorexic in her teens and one who is/was obese. If food is a BIG issue in your household (I fear for us it is due to DS's allergies) then you are establishing problems for the future when food become not merely something to sustain them but something to battle with.

Pruni · 23/11/2006 09:11

Message withdrawn

EllieChocolateOrange · 23/11/2006 09:18

Drosophila - you hit the nail on the head! Yes, it is the relationship with food that is important. I TRY to be relaxed in most things, including food - and yes we eat fish fingers and baked beans as well as lentils and brown rice! (not to mention chocolate cake - and ds is only 11 mths)...

I think food should be enjoyed, one of life's pleasures, and a daily one!

niceglasses · 23/11/2006 09:25

I suppose the point I tried to make further down is basically that the pple who really need help feeding kids would never even have this discussion - those are the ones you might see out giving what you deem a terribly inappropriate meal. I think tbh we are preaching to more or less converted here - efforts should be elsewhere, but I don't know how because it goes far far beyond food. Thats my gripe with the 'guess what I saw today' threads. I don't have a problem with pple feeding their whatever they want - if they know better but continue to feed them shite all the time more fool them - but its the pple who don't know or don't have the power to do anything about it that we should be really focusing on.

nailpolish · 23/11/2006 09:28

i still cant believe an adult woman was eating a curly wurly, let alone giving bits to her 9 mth old

Bozza · 23/11/2006 09:28

So am I hung up about food? I don't think I am. I deleted part of my previous post about also disagreeing with the phrase "all things in moderation" which is often bandied around. I don't think that is really true, some things are totally undesirable, some things (fruit, veg) rarely need moderation. I am not a lentil weaver and my kids have fruit shoots, haribo etc, but they also have a home cooked dinner even on the days when DH and I are both out of the house for 10 hours. So does that make me smug and hung up on food?

niceglasses · 23/11/2006 09:30

Ooo I love curly wurlys - I wouldn't have given any of mine to the kid - its mine!

bababoo · 23/11/2006 09:36

my ds is currently eating bread off the carpet...

EllieChocolateOrange · 23/11/2006 09:38

Forgive me, Bozza, I am not one of the Fruitshoot Police. But what is the difference between that, and a Bird's Eye fishfinger with a glass of water?! Aren't the both ok 'in moderation'?

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