Please help! I can't cook! I can't operate my oven! I'm fat and unhealthy!

[frankie80]

Title says it all really.

My DH does the cooking but he works long hours, which means I wait til he's home or get a take away.

DD is fed at my mother's (looks after her before/after school) so I'm fortunate there.

My mother never taught me to cook, or to do housework (although I'm okay at that). She refuses to show me even now as she thinks I should 'figure it out' etc.

I have NO idea what the symbols on my oven mean. Nor the symbols on the packs of food. I don't understand weighing of food.

I don't know how long to cook things like steak for, I even exploded an egg I was trying to boil.

I can make a sandwich and I can use my microwave (one thing I can do, wowee)

I'm a fussy eater too. I don't like pasta/pizza/most vegetables/fish/curries

I want to be healthier and slim. I want to be able to cook for my family.

Please tell me where to start. I tried some books but they didn't help because they had food I don't like or spoke about 'settings on the oven' without me knowing what it meant!

Please give me really really simple foolproof recipes for normal meals? Quick ones too?

I'm very embarrassed by this so please don't make fun of me.

OP don't bother with books there are millions of videos on YouTube that teach even the very basic basics.

I agree with starting with foods you like, I'm sure mners will gladly talk you through it.

Firstly, you need to ask your dh to show you how to operate your cooker. It will only take a few seconds.

Do you use your local library? If so, go have a browse through their books and find one that has a title similar to 'cooking for beginners' or ' simple, quick recipes'. Find one that has recipes you like the sound of.
Buy the ingredients and try a recipe when your dh is at home just in case in you need him but try to do it without any help. You could start off with a simple soup recipe.
If you have a stick blender, I find that's easier and less of a faff than getting a big blender out.
Your library will also have stuff on healthy eating and free handouts.

Good luck op.

Jacket potatoes:
Heat oven to 190 degrees (or gas mark 6)

Wash, rub skin with a bit of salt, Prick with a fork.
Cook for about 50 mins test it by either squishing it so it gives way under your fingers or poke with a fork. (Length of time depend on size of potato and oven)

You can serve it with loads of different things either at the same time or not:

Butter/tuna/baked beans/cheese/cottage cheese/sweetcorn/chilli/prawn cocktail/

And a salad.
It is quite common for deaf people to have trouble with cooking as it is harder to pick things up from family/tv etc. don't be embarrassed. My dad is 68 and can't use the oven!

Frankie, cooking is all about practice, you are learning a new craft like sewing so try and be kind to yourself and expect it to take

Another handy hint, only use a very sharp smooth edged knife for chopping, never use a serrated or blunt one as it will put you off.

A decent peeler also makes a difference.

*take a while

And if you google anything, google images or videos, quite often they lead into other things, so 'fry an onion' will take you to 'how to chop an onion without cutting your fingers'.

Are you cautious about this kind of thing?

Use your mobile phone as a timer for cooking and on vibrate and keep in your pocket.

Roasting food is dead easy.

As for oven look up its manual online. Most manufacturers keep free copies online so get googling. And just use the basic functions on the oven.

Roasting is dead easy. Get a piece of meat and place on roasting tray. Grind a bit of salt and pepper on. Into oven on circa 180c and the packaging will tell you how long to roast for.

Roast veg with it. You can throw almost any veg onto a roasting tray with a teeny splash of olive oil and seasoning. Again into oven. Google roasting times of veg.

Baby steps. Learn to do one thing at a time. Don't try to do a 5 course taster menu immediately

And I wouldn't dream of laughing at you by the way.

I would bet there isn't a single one of us here who doesn't struggle with a so-called everyday task that others do without thinking about. So it would be a foolish person who laughed at you. And the thing is, the longer it goes on, the more embarrassed you get and the harder it is to ask for help. So I think you've been brave to post!

some really useful posts, thanks so much

Just try some ideas frankie- the worst that can go wrong is that you waste a bit of food. It's a learning curve. Once you have made a couple of meals your confidence will rise and you will feel better about approachng new ideas. Keep us posted.

oh thanks Bitoutofpractice, that was kind.

You know, I never even thought of youtube!! Will search for some with subtitles

right, I've decided to be brave and attempt a meal tonight eeeek. Want to surprise my DH cos when I was doing the ironing last night he told me to sit down and he'd do it cos he could see I was feeling a bit down. Love him. Any advice on what I could try based on what we have?

In Freezer - we have burgers and steak we got from the butcher, pack of harry ramsdens battered haddock, birds eye chicken nuggets, mccain chips.
In fridge - apples, satsumas, strawberries, babybel light cheese, mullerlight yoghurts, pasta (for the hubby), honey roast ham, egg noodles, chicken breasts.

I'm also thinking of ordering from the fruit/veg van that comes around - potatoes obviously, what else do you think?

in cupboards, we have frylight, extra virgin olive oil, stir fry oil, bread, pasta sauces, nutella (lol), peanut butter, soups, crackers, crisps, chocolate.

I have a george foreman grill, an oven, a microwave.

sorry, I keep posting messages - hubby hates fish of all kinds, he also hates eggs, nuts, anything with a visual bone. So makes my situation a lot easier, huh??

I would also recommend Delias how to cook books. I was a bit like you, thought not quite so much, when I got married. I learnt by a process of trial and error to be honest, and was blessed with a husband who was willing to eat my cooking whatever it tasted like! I'm now not a bad cook, so don't despair. Perhaps a good method would be to follow a basic recipe, ask questions on here for things you don't understand, see how it turns out and if it's not great, try to figure out what went wrong and try again. And classes sound a great idea if you can find things suitable. Or get someone to come to your house and show you?

If you are cooking a healthy meal the rules are that half the plate is vegetables. What would you eat?

Maybe chicken breasts with potatoes and vegetables?
And a fruit salad (just chopped up fruit in a bowl really!) with optional yoghurt on top?
I would put some oil and salt on chicken breasts, put them on a baking tray and cook in the oven, for 20mins-half an hour (once you've decoded the oven). Potatoes you can peel, cut into quarters (if they are big ones) and boil in a pan of water for about 20 mins. Depending which veg you have peel (if necessary) cut into pieces, rinse and put in water in a separate pan, and boil for just a bit less time than potatoes.
For boiling potatoes and veg I usually boil water in the kettle first and then pour it into the saucepan as it takes a long time to get to boiling in the pan.
If you can make some instant gravy that would be nice (instructions on packet!).

Steak and chips would be an easy tea from what you have there OP.

Some frozen stuff, generally frozen convenience food, is designed to be cooked from frozen. That usually includes things that you buy frozen, iyswim, like oven chips, nuggets, fish fingers, burgers. Things that you buy fresh and freeze, like steak from the butcher, are generally best defrosted before you use them.

So if you fancy cooking the steak for tea, take it out of the freezer now, put it on a plate (to catch any juices / water from the defrosting) and leave it on the counter. It should have defrosted by tea time.

Oven chips - you want a hot oven, and you want it preheated. This is because you want them to crisp up a bit, and if you put them in a cold oven, or a low temp, they'll just be soggy. Turn your oven on ten minutes before you put them in. 200C. Spread the chips out in a thin layer on a baking tray / grill pan, so that they cook evenly. Check the pack how long they take, probably about fifteen minutes. Turn them over halfway through.

Always read the pack on convenience foods like that, anything that comes in packaging like rice will have good simple instructions.

A lot of cooking is about using the right heat for the right length of time so the food is cooked but not overdone. What overdone is depends partly on the food, and partly on your taste. Think about toast - the same principles apply.

What about the battered haddock and some oven chips? Ok, not the healthiest option but not really awful. There will be instructions on the packets, but I would think that they'll both cook at 200 in about 20-25 mins. If the packets have different instructions don't panic. Stuff like chips, battered fish, chicken nuggets generally takes about 20-25 mins at 200 in my experience! It's usually already cooked so all you're doing is making it hot and crispy in the oven. Make sure the oven is hot before you put the food in. Put the food on a baking tray. Don't just rely on the timings. If after the required time the chips still look a bit pale and sad, leave them in for a few more minutes.

Fruit salad for pudding. Chop. Eat.

Why don't you do ham and chips followed by fruit salad? If you want to be healthy you have ham and eggs. You have one thing to cook (chips - 20 mins in a hot oven) and a little bit of prep for the fruit salad but I think that's a reasonably balanced meal.

For boiled eggs - eggs in pan of cold water, on the stove bring to boil (boil - lots of large bubbles jumping out of the water and loads of steam) and then turn off the heat and leave for at least 5 mins. you should get a softish boiled egg which is easy enough to peel.

ha ha we're all suggesting chips. and fruit salad! I agree with what beccajoh says - so much of cooking is about checking as you go. Good cooks rarely have exact temps or timings - ovens are low/medium/high and then they check and test the food as they go.

will I need tin foil? I don't have any :(

I've placed an order with the fruit/veg van for baking potatoes, peppers, mushrooms, onions, more eggs.

Thinking of the george foreman with either the burgers or steak...how long for? Need to find the instructions for the GF

I use a rule of only one battered or deep fried food per meal. So get some baby new potatoes with the fish. Cover with boiled water and cook for ten to 15 mins on a low heat with a lid on.

Learn how to use the oven alarm! I use it for everything. It means I don't have to worry about things burning. Even boiling an egg, or when a recipe says fry an onion gently until soft, which takes around 7 minutes.

Are you OK at basic maths OP?

Also reading packet instructions, they are reaaally important, so when it say remove all packaging they don't mean just take the plastic lid off. The writing is always fiendishly small so it's easy to get wrong.

George Foreman for the steak is a good idea. It depends how thick the steak is and how well you like it cooked, but not long, especially on a George Foreman grill, because the heat is coming from both sides (as opposed to a pan). Probably 5 - 8 minutes. I would give it 5, then check (you can either prod to feel how soft the meat is, the softer the more pink, or cut into it). Beef can safely be eaten pink - you need to worry more about thoroughness of cooking for chicken and pork.

Have a look at the George Foreman instructions online, you'll need to preheat it, I don't have one but imagine there's a light that will tell you when it's ready for the food.

No foil, unless the tray you're putting the chips in is an utter state!

Have a look at the BBC good food website. You enter the ingredients you have then it gives you recipes. You need to start researching, read up on food hygiene. Then get in the kitchen and start cooking.