Can't believe I'm asking this, but I need some bloody good recipes from you lot!

[Rhubarb]

Ok, it's for a meal with four of our neighbours plus a quickie for the kids to munch at a separate table. It's a goodbye thing and normally when we eat at theirs they have about 5 courses.

I don't have a large kitchen and no freezer, so it has to be simple. And the food must be available at our local intermarché, so no fancy stuff ok?

I need a starter
Then a sort of startery thing after that
Then a main
Then a dessert
Cheeses ok after that
Coffee I can do

I want to leave them with a fantastic impression of English food, so wow me!

(waits for sarcastic cheese on toast recipes)

Errr, a neighbour has just knocked and given us enough courgettes and green beans to last all year, so maybe a recipe including those would be good. Stuffed courgettes?

Just to check - what is the oven capacity (ie is it a double oven thing), and can we assume that you have plenty of large saucepans/roasting dishes.

You have to do Prawn Cocktail in a glass

I'm thinking something in a sauce with the courgettes and green beans. Maybe Cod?

Desert, Eton Mess. So quick to make but it very tasty.

As for the startery thing after the starter, I have no idea.

Small oven, one casserole dish not very large.

This is a tall order I know, but my saving grace is that I am actually quite a good cook! (don't tell Custy) but I need some new ideas.

What is Eton Mess?

Eton Mess is broken up merangues (sp), strawberries and raspberries mixed with thick whipped cream.

Ok, gimme recipe! Merangue (how the feck DO you spell that?), is that like whipped egg whites that are cooked then?

Eton Mess is bloody lovely. Yuuuummmmmmmm

I know a lovely recipe for green beans in grainy mustard and creme fraiche sauce? It's piss easy, parboil green beans, then sitir fry in butter. Add dollop of grainy mustard, dollop of creme fraiche, warm a little, salt and pepper, serve with crusty bread - might that do for a starter after your starter? Or as an accompaniament - would go beautifully with le rosbif, and some new potatoes dontcha know ?

Stuffed courgettes - half the courgettes longways, scoop out middle. Gently fry in butter with breadcrumbs, chopped bacon, herbs and paremesan, plong into the courgette shells' and then grill til crispy.

Eton mess (I think) is broken up merangues, strawberries and whipped cream, piled artfully into a glass. Top with sprig of mint.

sorry, x-posts over eton mess - and I forgot the rasps

Merangues are just whipped egg whites and a bit of sugar.
You could cheat and buy them

Ok, no dessert glasses - will it do in a bowl?

Like the courgette idea, perhaps as an accompanient to the main? Or as a starter, yes, with the green bean thingy as an accompanient.

Melon for starters?

I daren't do roast beef! Some other meat please!

How do you set a merangue? Or does it set on it's own? How much sugar do I add?

GIMME A MEAT DISH! They need meat - they're French!
No steak though, I can't cook steak for the French, I'm too scared!

just rifling through my trusty ol' '1001 ways to cook horsemeat'.....

Leg of lamb, studded with lots and lots of garlic,served rare.

oooh yes!(mouth watering) the beans would go well with that too...Or you could do a sort of ratatouille to go with it

I would second LGJ's lamb idea.

Hmmm, leg of lamb, sounds good!
Not sure about the raw bit though!

Horse meat! I don't think so!

I hate to sound common, but wtf is ratatouille?

My stock dessert is 1 250g tub mascarpone cheese, 1 200g bar dark choc. Melt together, pour into individual little dishes (or something like espresso cups) and leave to set.

You can add brandy, coffee, whatever flavouring you like.

Roast stuff is always good for entertaining as it allows you to do most of the cooking in advance and still be able to chat to people when they arrive. Just time the lamb to come out of the oven as you are sitting down to your second starter. That way it will be rested nicely. courgettes cut into slices and tossed with crushed garlic and olive oil and then grilled are easy and delicious.

It's mediterranean veg stew [grin}

Fry in olive oil any combo of courgettes, tomatoes, onions, red/green/yellow peppers, mushrooms,aubergine, with mixed herbs, a bay leaf if you have one, and garlic. Add salt, lots of ground black pepper, pinch of sugar and some tinned toms, or tom puree and spash of water, simmer but stop before the veg loses texture. Can be cooked day before if needed. Also nice with a splash of red wine in.

Ratatouille is technically a stew of southern french vegetables - aubergine, peppers, courgettes, onions, garlic and tomatoes.
TBH it is lovely but if you have never made it before I wouldn't serve it to French folk whose mothers are all going to have family recipes for it!

Right, so how is this then?

Melon (it's hot here still until about 9pm)
with aperitifs obv!
Then stuffed courgettes
Then roast lamb with green beans and mustard things and chips
Then the eton puddingy thing
then cheese and bread
then coffee (perhaps Irish coffee?)