My DH has always drunk on a regular basis. He's Irish and it's the 'norm' in his family. I am made to feel unsocialable and 'stuck up' for want of a better word, because I rarely drink now. Over the last two or three years DH's drinking has got a lot worse and it is effecting our marriage, his job, his relationship with the kids and his health. At the begining of the year he starting having alcoholic fits and finally admitted to being an alcoholic, something I had known for sometime. He went to AA but gave up after 2 meetings, tried to do it on his own but after a few days he would find any excuse to start again, he found one, my grandma died, he had a stressful day, the kids had wound him up. He seemed genuinly disappointed in himself when he had drunk but I had a lot "this is a one off" which tended to last a week at a time. He had asked the hospital for help on more than one visit but he was always refered to someone else. One doctor referred him to a psychiatrist, she gave him a phone number to ring, the drug and alcohol service. That's as far as it went. Finally 6 weeks ago I had had enough and packed my bags ready to leave. Again we had the pie crust promises, "I will give up on Monday", I thought my mind was made up, I had had 6 months of "...on Monday". I stood up to walk out the door, the car was packed the kids strapped in and he stood in my way, picked up the phone and dialled the alcohol and drug service helpline. My mind and heart were now at war. I stayed until his 1st assesment, then his 2nd, I filled in the forms for him to go into detox and his follow-up in rehab. I took him to his appointments and dropped him off at the detox clinic and I will pick him up when he's finished his detox next week but I have this doubt in my mind. I know how determined he says he is but will this work? I cannot continue living like this. I cannot watch him die. My mum used to work in a pub and we would regularly visit. Many of the people I met there were alcoholics. I worked in the shop opposite Mum's pub and many of them then came in to shop. I watch a few men mainly, slowly kill themselves with the drink, slowly bleding to death, turning yellow etc. I can't watch my DH go through that, yet if he is determined and does manage to kick it, I don't want to leave. I feel that I cannot leave at the moment, I know how much he loves meand the kids and I know giving up alcohol is incredibly difficult. I feel that I would be leaving him when he needs all the help he can get. His family all drink and his mother is a recovering alcoholic, but none of them support him. They ridicule him and eat away at his self esteem. If I left now he would have no-one. I feel like a fool staying. I know a few people in abusive relationships where I think if Dh did that to me I would not be there but now I'm on the inside with people saying that about me it's totally different. Help!