Vasectomies for all

[LadySparrow]

Sorry if this isn’t the right chat, I’m in the Bluestocking and various others if checks needed.

Just back from a night out with several pissed off women -as we should be- so possibly not at my most coherent.

A question was raised - if vasectomies are 90% reversible, why are young men not required to have vasectomies in order to have sex. As opposed to the majority view that women should be on hormonal contraceptives.

The majority of contraception “fails” seems to be from the male POV and perspective that if women are on the pill/implant/injection and it fails then they are solely liable.

In which case why are men not given a vasectomy option at a young age with the possibility of a reversal if they change their minds.

Thoughts? There were many in my group tonight, curious to see what people think.

What are you actually proposing - mandatory vasectomies for young men, or optional?

The option of fully available vasectomies for young men.

It’s currently not at all available, easy to access, or something that is readily accessible.

Because forcing surgery on anyone who doesn’t need it is inhumane. That’s a good enough reason for me.

Did you miss the word option in my post and follow up?

On one hand I agree men need to take more of the burden, but would you trust a man who says he’s had a vasectomy?

I agree the option should be there. And soerm bank if it can’t be reversed. All a lot less invasive and intrusive than the equivalent of what women have to go through for similar outcomes.

I thought they were 90% irreversible? And you can still get an std from someone with a vasectomy. It should be more readily available and there should be an information campaign to make more keen take them up but only for those who definitely don't want children or more children. None of this expecting women to continue to take contraception because c they are too squeamish.

You’re quite right pp I wouldn’t trust a man to telll the truth.

in general I approved of the idea

So if you wouldn't trust a man who says they've had a vasectomy and it wouldn't protect against STDs anyway, why do you nevertheless approve of the idea?

Do you think most young women would be happy to risk a 10% chance of infertility so men don't have to use contraception?

Not reversible on the NHS.

The are not always reversible. After three years the success rate of reversing is about 50%.
And it’s an elective surgery: have you seen the waiting lists??

Nope never. Can't have children he said, infertile he claimed, devastated when he found out he would never be able to have his own child. That impossible child is now a teenager and it was only after we separated that I found out he had an older child, lying pos.

I don’t think it’s a good idea for temporary contraception.

But I do think it should be more easily available. Our NHS area doesn’t offer them at all, so it cost us quite a bit to go privately when DH had his. Obviously it cost us less than another child, but a lot more than the free contraception I could have got.

This is why people on here usually say that you need to take responsibility for your own contraception if you don't want children. Men who end up fathers after trusting their partner's word that they were on the pill are always told that they should've been more proactive.

Not 100% anyway

This is the most stupid thing I’ve read on here all week

why are young men not required to have vasectomies in order to have sex.

What the dystopian fuck is this? You cannot write something this insane and then try to claim you meant 'optional'.

Would they then required to provide a certificate demonstrating their infertility before having sex? Because no man ever lied ever.

“if vasectomies are 90% reversible, why are young men not required to have vasectomies in order to have sex. ”

this is insane
Have you had a lot of drink?

This is a ridiculous idea!
But...
I do think it is incredibly selfish/misogynistic of men not to have a vasectomy when their family is complete. Unreasonable to expect their wife/partner to take responsibility for contraception (all hormonal options of which have risks and side effects) until 55ish and also risk pregnancy when the snip is by far the most relIable option.

On one hand I agree men need to take more of the burden, but would you trust a man who says he’s had a vasectomy?

Nope, and this is why the burden of contraception will always fall on the woman.
It's the woman who can get pregnant, with everything thah brings.
No sensible woman would trust a man 100%.
If a man doesn't use a condom and the woman gets pregnant he is told he should have sorted out the birth control. But he could, as a minimum, just be left to pay child maintenance and nothing else.

I think the problem is always that as women we know we can never trust a man with contraception no matter the method for a variety of reasons.

They will never be the one to suffer the consequences of an unwanted pregnancy and an abortion so it does not occupy a priority space in their mind.

Plus let’s face it, how many of them can we 100% rely on to even take the bins out?

I read that the longer it has been since the surgery, the less likely you are to be able to reverse it.

I also read that many men who have had reversals require fertility help to conceive. They have a low sperm count so they need to do something like IUI which means the woman ultimately requires invasive procedures.

Do you think that's a cultural thing? Or jjst a who you choose thing?

I mean, my husband wouldn't want to miss bin day nor have the house smelling like rubbish so if he noticed the bin needed emptying, he'd just do it. So would my now adult son.

But admittedly, one of the things that attracted to me to my husband is that he is domesticated/house-proud. It is important to me so I found someone who shares those values.

Even if it was available as an option I can't see many young men taking it up. There would be exceptions of course, I can think of maybe three of my male friends who might (all child free and no desire to become dads), but given the risk of a reversal not working, I don't think those who do want to be dads would go for it.

I’m highly delighted for you.

Shame on me and many others for not choosing the right men when they come so clearly labelled with “Caution, may turn into lazy arsehole once honeymoon is over”.