Everyday rape

[bridgetreilly]

This morning I was listening to Natalie Fleet MP tell her story of being groomed by a much older man when she was 15, and only decades later realising that what had happened to her was statutory rape, and that she had been manipulated into ‘consent’. One of the powerful points she was making was that rape is so often not talked about that it is easy not to realise how endemic it is in our society.

As I was listening, I thought that what we needed was an ‘everyday rape’ website, like the old ‘everyday sexism’ one, where anyone could come and record their story. Date rape, marital rape, sex abuse, rape when you were a child, violent rape, sexual assault. Whatever your story is of sex without your free consent.

I don’t have the capacity to set up and maintain a website like that, so if you do, please go for it. In the meantime, please use this thread. Name changes are fine, of course. I would like it if you could state:

1. Your biological sex
2. Biological sex of your rapist
3. Your age when it happened or began to happen
4. Age of your rapist when it happened or began to happen
5. Anything you want to tell us about your story

If you have been raped over a period of time by one person, choose whether to make one post or many.

If you were raped by more than one person in the same event, please make one post but indicate the number of those involved.

If you have been raped at different times by different people, please record those in separate posts,

I’d like it if this wasn’t a place for general chat or discussion. Please add your reactions to support individual posters and feel free to start separate follow up discussion threads.

If this thread, reading it or posting in it, makes you realise you need support, please, please go and find it. The Rape Crisis line is available 24/7 for those over 16 and Childline for those who are younger.

Erm, no thank you. Also, how do we know you are posting in good faith? Feels a bit emotional vampire at the very least.

Bit weird. People who have been raped are likely highly traumatised. I doubt many people will be keen to post a little summary on here.

No obligation to share at all. Certainly no obligation to share any details. But I think we need to know just how everyday this. Natalie Fleet claimed that every woman has either been raped or knows someone who has. I think that is probably true but it can feel like you are the only one.

Literally all I’m suggesting is something like 15F raped by 37M. If someone wants to say more, that’s fine but not expected.

I was groomed from age 8. He was an avuncular shopkeeper in his 60s; gentle, kind, warm, benevolent. First it was 25p to go into the back room, then 50p for a cuddle. Very gradually, over several years, he lured me with cash and goods to do something several times before going one small step further. It took five years to get to full intercourse. I spent my young life ashamed of being a prostitute. It took me decades to realise I was raped.

Biological sex would be male.

Biological females cannot be guilty of rape, only assault by penetration.

I’m not describing my sexual abuse and rape so that people can wank off over it!