Male behaviour in swimming pools

[Greyandrare123]

I go to a private gym that has a pool. I swim about 3x a week.
The people swimming are diverse. Women, men, all ages (adults only after 5pm).
The same behaviour I see on the streets operates in the pool. Males ploughing down the informal lanes, splashing and not giving a toss who is in their way. Ive had 2 men directly collide into me because I didnt see them behind me and move.

And then there is the wrestling. Groups of younger men wrestling with each other, throwing each other in the air, headlocking, pushing each others heads under water, shadow boxing etc. Splashing wildly in the middle of the pool so everyone else has to move.

Ive yet to see women do the same.

Then manspreading in the steam room. Legs wide apart.

Is this familiar? The lifeguards seem oblivious.

Yes, I recognise what you described here. I had not been to pools since a child, then started going again because of DC, and was quite shocked by it!

Even in busses and on trains they sit with their legs wide open.
There was a time I thought men had to sit that way.

The lifeguards seem oblivious

It's because male bad behaviour is permissible - "boys will be boys".

Same with male football fans - they are incredibly intimidating en masse, but the public are just expected to deal with them on public transport and the streets each weekend.

As it's a private gym, you could say that you won't be renewing your membership. Not all pools are like this, so don't give up swimming - just shop around.

Why don’t you get some earplugs?
seems a bit odd to go swimming and expect to not get any water in your ears.

To be fair, the new sauna was fine becsuse it was more visible, the old building the sauna, steam room and plunge pool were in a separate room of their own so unless staff were in they they basically used it as a wanktourium (and not just themselves, several were barred after they were caught

I hate wearing them, I’d rather not go. When I was little I was forced to plug my ears with wads of cotton wool smothered in Vaseline for school swimming lessons etc, had the piss taken out of me mercilessly. I can’t stand wearing any of them now. I manage very well taking the kids to the baths (we go at least 2 times a month) and not getting a single drop in, even with dozens of other kids playing and splashing about. I stopped lane swimming a few years ago now after my last 2 nasty infections were caused by lane swimmers slapping water into the side of my head. I’ve not had one since 🤷🏼‍♀️

I know people advocate for female-only spaces, but couldn't we also have family-only spaces? I enjoy swimming as a family and my DH is really lovely. It would just be nice to have a break from entitled, rude men.

Lots of pools are closing down now, too expensive to heat, unless you're Rishi sunak of course....
Let's all go to his pool, I reckon we could easily beat the little manlet

So far we've had men are too fast and men are too slow in this thread 😅
Last time I swam regularly it was a university pool open to the public and the main clash was between the young, fast students (male and female) obviously training and powering up and down and the elderly retired people (mostly female but some male) who either slowly swam up and down together chatting or stood milling about in the shallow end chatting.
Then some 18-20 yo would get in and literally cause waves.

Very odd that staff don't intervene to stop people wrestling or being otherwise disruptive. I haven't noticed at the pool I go to, everyone tends to select their lane and just get on with it but I can well imagine.

But this doesn’t really mean anything.
Every woman on this planet thinks their husband is the last lovely one 😉

Female only sessions! Bliss.

I'm intending to take up swimming again but this thread has totally put me off. When I used to go regularly, my local pool had women-only sessions so I didn't experience this kind of behaviour. It doesn't surprise me, though.

Not at my pool. You have to avoid the 4pm rush.

There are 2 women who come in and "share a lane" - all fine btw - if its busy you need to share.

But they cut you off, they smack their feet into your face, they plash and they even scratced my back once! Basically making swimming hell- so they can have a lane to themselves while others are crowded with 4+ people. Disgusting behaviour.

Give me a single splashing male specimen anytime!

I cancelled my gym membership;it has a lovely wet facility with a pool,sauna,steam room,poolside loungers and hot tub.

I'd go in the day when the kids were in school unfortunately the wet facility during the day seemed to be occupied by a large group of men over 60 who used the everything other than the pool and would watch you when you were in the pool;it was really intimidating and when any of the younger women came into the pool especially those wearing bikinis the blokes would watch them abit too intently.The aqua fit sessions (full of women) were especially popular with the poolside perverts also.

I actually mentioned the above to the gym manager and asked if they would consider any women only sessions and the answer was no.

Luckily the men don't seem to be too bad at my local pool. There isn't lane swimming but one half of the main pool is for swimming in a circuit and they do tend to overtake rather splashingly but otherwise not an issue.
The saunas are sex-segregated so no idea what the men act like in them but not my problem anyway.

yes I used to get ones who'd just sit there and stare too.
I don't know why there's any need to have chairs/sunloungers poolside indoors, it's not like you're lying there sunbathing if it was outside on a sunny day, you're sitting there a bit clammy in your wet costume.

Again it was always men who just sat there, and, yes, almost always older ones too. They also always seemed pissed off if anyone of working age dared to visit the pool during the day, I kept getting asked 'Day off is it?' The idea of WFH and flexible hours was too much for them to cope with.

I go to a pool that's separated into formal lanes. Slow, medium and fast for the public, then another four lanes which are exclusively for the professional athletes to train in. No nonsense or messing about. The only issue I have is that people tend to gravitate towards the medium speed lane who really should be in the fast lane or the slow lane.

But that applies to men and women

I swim during the day and its old men who drive me nuts. They just dont notice anyone else. And they swim on their backs, feet first, so as you swim down theres a big pair of old feet in your face!! Bloody hell.
And even worse, theres one old guy who stretches with his leg up on the side of the pool in his baggy shorts after his swim 😡for friggin ages....gives me the dry boak.
I just dont see women doing any of that..

And they swim on their backs, feet first, so as you swim down theres a big pair of old feet in your face

I'm confused as to how that is different from other strokes. If you are swimming in lanes, you are always looking at the feet of the person in front.

Thank you for your responses. I thought I may have been over reacting but obvs there are problems commonly seen.

Id love to use a public swimming pool but I need the graded steps as Im disabled and use a crutch. I only use the sauna because the pool is freezing.

The water has been so good for me in terms of mental health and physical health.

I may ask the gym how they can better support disabled people and safeguard women from aggressive kicks, splashing, being ploughed into by much stronger people and be expected to watch water wrestling. Its not all men of course but its annoying

I swim in several times a week and at several different pools. I recognise the entitled males, there are particular individuals who go at certain times of day. They see that I'm female and cut in front of me, assuming I'm slow (I'm not) and they particularly resent being overtaken. I have had them speed up to prevent me overtaking and then block me to cause a collision. They swim "wide", using so much space it's hard to get round, when they could easily move over or wait to let me by at the end of the length. I have never had a female swimmer behave like this towards me, not once.
However, I have worked out it is a certain few culprits rather than the majority of men. I have changed lanes or the time I swim to avoid them and it's much calmer and more enjoyable. There is another pool where I encounter this attitude much less frequently so I go there when I can. It makes me sad though that, even as a fast and confident swimmer, I move over to make space for bullish men because on the occasions I have tried to stand my ground it has been so stressful and not at all the swimming experience that I love.
I want to encourage those that are disheartened that swimming is wonderful, and please don't let a few bad experiences put you off. There may be other pools or other times of day where you don't encounter this behaviour.

Swimbeciles

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/horror-woman-dragged-underwater-male-24443695

This was a few years ago, there were news items at the time and the number of women that had been attacked was horrific.