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Feminism: chat

Men, taking dominating yoga/groups.

150 replies

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 09/09/2022 12:08

I've just come back from what should have been a chilled yoga class. Half way through, a man enters, announces he thought it started later, but he will join anyway. Rather than just quietly join in, he bangs his stuff about loudly. I found myself tutting. He settled down for a bit, but then during relaxation at the end, he has to competively exhale. No one else's breathing audible but his. I realise his entrance was a "A man has come, all hail the man, women" and I have seen it many times, being an old bird. But what do they actually get out of it? Surely it doesn't produce results? Or are they just satisfied when they've done it regardless? I've seen/experienced this in about every excercise class/reading group/whatever I've ever been in, and am a tad vexed about it tbh. In fact, if there is a womens only yoga class, I go for that. Any answers please? And anything I can actually do rather than passively agressively tut, or have a word with the tutor? Probably not. It's just soooo tiresome! Angry

OP posts:
SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 22/09/2022 14:33

Yes, too many eggs I think! Grin

OP posts:
GraveAndQuietAtTheMouthOfHell · 22/09/2022 14:39

I do a lovely stretch class at my gym (yoga is seen as cultural appropriation) and the instructor is firm to the point of rude with late arrivals.
If they try and come in after the warm up, they are clearly told to leave, and why.

AssignedSlytherinAtBirth · 22/09/2022 14:42

It's up to the teacher to pointedly ask people to be quiet. She has a responsibility to the others in the class. Mine said she had no problem with people coming in late or leaving early so long as they were very quiet. It did the trick 😉

AssignedSlytherinAtBirth · 22/09/2022 17:15

@GraveAndQuietAtTheMouthOfHell

Re. yoga being seen as cultural appropriation - well, as with so many other things, "it depends". I've heard an Indian yoga teacher get pissed off about Westerners and yoga was saying how 'hot yoga' as practised in LA is a long way from its Indian roots and can do more harm to the body than good. You don't know whether the OP's class falls into the 'takes the piss' category or not.

I've spent the past hour online looking at this, and the short answer seems to be that if you acknowledge its Indian roots and traditions, it's not CA. However, if you sanitize it, isolate it from meditation and its other aspects and seek to make money from branded yoga mats, clothing etc, then it is CA. Here's a short explanatory video:
www.bing.com/videos/search?q=is+yoga+cultural+appropriation&docid=608029694417518360&mid=1DB2BC601421DBCF47A11DB2BC601421DBCF47A1&view=detail&FORM=VIRE

The problem is that if we shout 'Cultural Appropriation' at everything then we'll have a situation where we can't dance the tango if we're not from South America, and can't learn Japanese for fun, and stuff like that. Learning flamenco dance from a Spanish teacher, for example. A Spanish friend teaches and I've been to her classes. She learnt on a course in Spain. I don't claim to be any good, but I do acknowledge its roots.

GraveAndQuietAtTheMouthOfHell · 22/09/2022 17:30

yes @AssignedSlytherinAtBirth it's an interesting POV to explore- my gym's, not necessarily my own.
I think yoga is seen as a sacred practice by its originators and they don't appreciate it being stripped of its spiritual element and turned into mere 'exercise'.

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 22/09/2022 17:35

TBF, the yoga classes I've attended are about more than just the excercise.

OP posts:
Holly60 · 22/09/2022 18:01

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 10/09/2022 10:10

Yes, and they or at least the NAMALT brigade appear on threads like this! Almost as if we aren't allowed to talk about it on Feminist Chat... I did rather lol at lentil arse....Grin

But is it really a 'feminist issue' that you happened to be in an exercise class where a man did something to annoy you?

Surely you are not suggesting that yoga is 'for girls' and therefore he was out of place...

All a bit reductive if you ask me.

VroomVrooom · 22/09/2022 18:48

Holly60 · 22/09/2022 18:01

But is it really a 'feminist issue' that you happened to be in an exercise class where a man did something to annoy you?

Surely you are not suggesting that yoga is 'for girls' and therefore he was out of place...

All a bit reductive if you ask me.

It’s about observing a certain type of male behaviour that - clearly - many others have also witnessed, recognised and seen themselves. And then discussing it.

Pretty much the entire point of the feminist discussion board.

I don’t know any men in my circle who’d behave like this, so I’m not taking it deeply personally on their behalf - unlike many posters on this thread.

I absolutely do recognise the behaviour though, and think it’s a mildly diverting conversation to have.

If you don’t, you don’t need to join the thread.

VroomVrooom · 22/09/2022 18:49

And if you genuinely think the OP was suggesting ‘yoga is for girls and he was out of place’, I suggest you re-read the thread.

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 22/09/2022 19:08

Thanks Vroom. If anyone is being reductive, I think it might be Holly...

OP posts:
Holly60 · 22/09/2022 21:14

Ok, so what we are left with is that you were in a mixed yoga class and someone came in late and acted in a way you personally found annoying. You tutted in a passive aggressive way (something which incidentally would have irritated me more than the slightly buffoony man -if you have something to say, just say it)

Then you ask if there is anything you can do about it. Well no, because as you've acknowledged, yoga is for everyone and the guy wasn't really doing anything massively wrong. Certainly no more annoyingly than your impotent tutting.

You could ask the instructor not to let anyone in late I guess but that's about it, and it would be up to her whether to pay you any mind or not.

VroomVrooom · 22/09/2022 21:48

the guy wasn't really doing anything massively wrong.

So he was doing something wrong, then.

Certainly no more annoyingly than your impotent tutting.

Well, clearly most of us part ways with you on this.

But you obviously have some sort of need to defend annoying men that mean nothing to you on the internet. They’re lucky to have you, and I’m sure really appreciate it.

Meanwhile, other people like to discuss this sort of thing, so perhaps start your own thread about ‘impotent tutting’ and get that discussion under way.

Really fascinating how the people who think this is a non-issue just can’t stay away from the thread.

brokenandlost · 23/09/2022 11:16

You could ask the instructor not to let anyone in late I guess but that's about it, and it would be up to her whether to pay you any mind or not.

and if she doesn’t listen she’s not to be trusted. Clients in group exercise should be all present for the whole warm up to ensure they are ready for the class ahead. The instructor is not insured otherwise.

The instructor is clearly not giving a shit about safety of the participants, nor about disturbing the rest of the class that bothered to turn up on time.

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 24/09/2022 14:59

@VroomVrooom and @brokenandlost you're defending this against the obtuse so much better than I would! Grin

OP posts:
Spanky123 · 25/09/2022 13:55

Holly60 · 22/09/2022 21:14

Ok, so what we are left with is that you were in a mixed yoga class and someone came in late and acted in a way you personally found annoying. You tutted in a passive aggressive way (something which incidentally would have irritated me more than the slightly buffoony man -if you have something to say, just say it)

Then you ask if there is anything you can do about it. Well no, because as you've acknowledged, yoga is for everyone and the guy wasn't really doing anything massively wrong. Certainly no more annoyingly than your impotent tutting.

You could ask the instructor not to let anyone in late I guess but that's about it, and it would be up to her whether to pay you any mind or not.

Glad to see logic has arrived on this thread. The reactions to this common sense speak for themselves!!

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 25/09/2022 14:16

Oh do give over Spanky. You're boring now.

OP posts:
Spanky123 · 25/09/2022 14:34

Tutting is rude, condescending and as pointed out - passive aggressive. A far cry from being a few minutes late really.

I wonder if judgey pants has ever been a few minutes late as something overran.

VroomVrooom · 25/09/2022 19:33

I just knew you were constantly refreshing this thread @Spanky123. Grin

You really hate us finding certain men annoying, don’t you? It really, really winds you up.

As I say, fascinating how the people who think this is a non-issue are completely obsessed with the thread!

Spanky123 · 25/09/2022 20:38

I love this thread - mumsnet users united in a passionate and dedicated pursuit of an unashamedly anti-male agenda!!
Also the comments from some users are now more personal attacks, conveniently avoiding the issue of the post, which says enough for me. Enjoy your evenings!

VroomVrooom · 25/09/2022 20:47

Enjoy your evenings!

It’s morning here, but whatever. Notable that this ^^ is how you signed off your last strop from the thread. No doubt you will be back.

‘Anti-male’, you say? I have repeatedly said that I don’t know any men who behave like this. Mainly because the many men in my life are not annoying buffoons.

If you think being anti-annoying buffoons is anti-male, then you’re obviously saying all men are annoying buffoons. Which means you’re far more anti-male than I could ever dream of being.

Has anyone started the ‘impotent tutting’ thread yet, by the way?

Link me to it, and I’ll come over and throw you a bone on it.

InTheNavy · 26/09/2022 11:35

I don't think i've joined in a thread on the Feminism board before.... and I don't think i'll be back if this is representative.
It's like a Yr 9 wet lunchtime. Pathetic squabbling, sniping at people because they have a (rational but) different point of view. No intelligent discussion of the "issue".
Is this typical of this board?

Thelnebriati · 26/09/2022 13:11

This is not a private forum and its frequently trolled by bad faith actors. Just skip over the dross and focus on the discussion.

VroomVrooom · 26/09/2022 18:19

InTheNavy · 26/09/2022 11:35

I don't think i've joined in a thread on the Feminism board before.... and I don't think i'll be back if this is representative.
It's like a Yr 9 wet lunchtime. Pathetic squabbling, sniping at people because they have a (rational but) different point of view. No intelligent discussion of the "issue".
Is this typical of this board?

Yes, pretty much every thread on here does get derailed by people NAMALTing and shouting ‘anti-male’.

It is indeed extremely tedious when you have to have that discussion, instead of the one that’s actually been posted about.

InTheNavy · 26/09/2022 21:51

Say no more.

Spanky123 · 28/09/2022 19:56

Awfully frustrating isn't it Vroom vroom!!

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