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Feminism: chat

Feminism: sex and gender

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Original poster

" Pregnant woman yelled at me for offering her my seat on the bus'

90 replies

spotcheck · 14/09/2021 22:16

I was listening to Talk radio ( I like Julia Hartley-Brewer, but generally don't listen to others...
Anyways, the drive time presenter related a story that his elderly father was shouted at, on public transport, because he offered his seat to a woman who was visibly pregnant, and had a baby as well.
I can't remember the exact words, but she shouted something along the lines of ' I'm not weak, stop assuming I am' etc.

I despair. This woman was catering to the idea that we need to ignore women's biology, and pretend it doesn't have an impact. That to acknowledge female biological experience is to somehow admit weakness.
And yes, I understand that not every woman would have 'needed' the seat.

Your thoughts?

OP posts:

RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 18/09/2021 16:40

@AICM

Pankhurst...

You're one of the reasons feminism is losing.

Dont be silly….

RufustheBadgeringReindeer · 18/09/2021 16:41

Ooooooo though a friend once told me that I put feminism back by 100 years….

AICM · 18/09/2021 16:42

PankhurstConnection · 18/09/2021 16:46

@AICM

Pankhurst...

You're one of the reasons feminism is losing.

Oh you are hilarious - carry on.

PankhurstConnection · 18/09/2021 16:48

@RufustheBadgeringReindeer

Ooooooo though a friend once told me that I put feminism back by 100 years….

I know and it is sooooo cutting not to mention original. I've never heard the like before in all my years on this board...

JaneJeffer · 18/09/2021 17:19

She sounds very rude. A simple I'm fine thanks would do.

I once saw a blind man getting really angry at a woman who offered him a seat on the tube saying he was perfectly able to stand, etc. Everyone was mortified for her. I used to get off at the same stop as him and would tell him when it was safe to cross. Next time I saw him after that I was almost afraid to tell him but I did and he thanked me as usual.

IveGotASongThatllGetOnYNerves · 18/09/2021 17:22

She was fucking rude.
If she didn't feel the need to sit she could have said thank you but I'm fine.

AICM · 18/09/2021 19:11

Me again😀

Do you feel.feminism is winning or are things getting worse for women?

Adrianneanneanne · 18/09/2021 19:18

@Sagaz

Im always on the bus so im familiar with the behavioral psychology of bus behavior 😃 but really, many times, elderly pensioner men have engaged in this "after you madam" behavior nd im not comfortable with it. I might be 25-35 years younger than a man determined to do the After You Routine, even though he has a stick and he's so thin his suit his hanging off him.

Mind you, not seeing anybody under 55 on the bus today, or for ages!!! Covid has put an end to this.

Hmmm... I'm a young woman and I like to let people go before me if I'm not in a rush. Really shouldn't make you feel any sort of way just because it's an older man, they're just being polite. I'm always grateful when people are considerate and let me go first

AICM · 18/09/2021 20:28

Pankhurst

Hello...

Oh OK. You called me an arsehole for disagreeing with you asked me to talk to you then you soddded off.

Yep... one reason feminism is doing do badly is feminists like you.

So many women are deciding to not identify with femism. Now why could that be?

Bye!

PankhurstConnection · 18/09/2021 23:41

I was working FFS - you think I sit about on MN waiting on someone like you to respond to me?? I don't. And just so you know I won't be coming back to the thread again either as I stand by the original comment - which btw wasn't just directed at you but was a response to your opinion on feminists, because I very much doubt you have much of value to say to me. And yes, I'm sure that all the faults of feminism lie in my court - because of course they do. You know nothing about what kind of feminist I am and you are basing your opinion on the fact I don't think too highly of you on here. Well I still don't so I guess feminism is in real trouble

all because of me

NiceGerbil · 19/09/2021 02:01

Offering a pregnant woman a seat on public transport isn't feminism it's a basic nice thing to do.

The fact is that using tube bus in London for 30+ years I've never seen anything like this.

Ok maybe it happened in which case she's obviously a bit of a weirdo or having some kind of major issues.

I really really can't see it the story ticks too many boxes!

In the end for whatever reason a lot of people mainly men really resent the idea that should offer a seat to a pregnant woman. IME it's usually women who offer (if anyone).

That attitude is so widespread that tfl changed their signage on seats to give if someone needs it.

And then still felt the need to do baby on board badges.

However for those who like this story I mean just don't offer. Leave it to someone else. Most people do.

ColorMagicBarbie · 19/09/2021 11:21

Plot twist, maybe she was just fat. 😂

Cailleach1 · 21/09/2021 08:32

I'm amazed. At the supposed offer of a seat for a pregnant woman. Nobody ever offered me a seat on a train whilst pregnant.

I remember visiting Prague a little while after the Iron Curtain fell. One thing which I admired and was amazed at was the way younger people immediately got up and vacated their seats when an elderly person entered the tram. I had never seen this before.

EdgeOfACoin · 22/09/2021 05:43

I'm amazed. At the supposed offer of a seat for a pregnant woman. Nobody ever offered me a seat on a train whilst pregnant.

This hasn't been my experience, thank goodness. I do think the badges help - it removes the 'is she pregnant or just fat?' dilemma that some would-be offerers go through.

I have almost always accepted gratefully. On the odd occasion I have declined (hopefully graciously).

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