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Feminism: chat

How do I get rid of this pervert?

22 replies

Scrunchy95 · 22/02/2021 10:10

I am an artist specializing in still life and portraiture. I have a website and have business accounts on Instagram and Facebook. I had a call from a man claiming to be a retiring Ballet dancer wanting a portrait of himself on stage in his ballet gear. He told me a website to google so I could see a photo of him and it was a ballet dancer with the biggest 'packet' I have ever seen. During our discussion, he drew attention to the size of his privates and asked me if I should paint it in a way to draw less attention to it, but really kept the conversation on his groin. His call was number withheld and he told me he doesn't have an email account. The photo had the ballet dancer's name under it so I looked him up on Instagram and messaged him to ask if he had got in touch with me regarding a commission. He told me he hadn't but has had a lot of female artists asking the same thing and had considered getting in touch with the police. I now don't answer my phone when a withheld number calls but he leaves voicemails with him just breathing and I get the impression he is playing with himself. I want to pick up and tell him to fuck off but I have no idea who he is. He has my email and phone number so I don't want to piss him off and have been hoping he will just go away. But this has been going on for months. Does anyone have any idea what I can do? This guy is clearly harassing a number of women and getting away with it.

OP posts:

Swingometer · 22/02/2021 10:12

Report to police


DinosaurDiana · 22/02/2021 10:13

If you feel harassed could you get advice from the police ?
If he’s ringing a land line could you speak to your provider and get withheld numbers barred ?


Babdoc · 22/02/2021 10:14

I’d take the dancer’s advice and go to the police. They can be a lot more use to you than we can!


MashNgravy · 22/02/2021 10:17

Another vote for police. I'd try and coordinate with the person being impersonated and with the other artists so there's more of you and more weight/resources. I'd also definitely answer the phone and tell him to fuck off.


comedycentral · 22/02/2021 10:18

I think it's a police matter too. Sorry you are having to deal with this OP.


PlanDeRaccordement · 22/02/2021 10:19

Go to the police.


Sparklfairy · 22/02/2021 10:22

Christ! I'd go to the police too, and also tell the real owner of the 'package' that's what you're doing. They will probably want to speak to him anyway but a report from him directly would definitely help.


Scrunchy95 · 22/02/2021 10:22

'MashNgravy Mon 22-Feb-21 10:17:33
Another vote for police. I'd try and coordinate with the person being impersonated and with the other artists so there's more of you and more weight/resources. I'd also definitely answer the phone and tell him to fuck off.'

Thanks for this. Good advice. I will get in touch with the dancer again and see if he is willing to share the details of the other artists so I can get in touch with them and report all of the cases to the police.

OP posts:

Gcnq · 22/02/2021 10:24

I think the police do take "heavy breathing" voicemails more seriously these days so they will help.
Perhaps the ballet dancer could give the police the names of the other female artists who have been harassed by this weirdo.


Gcnq · 22/02/2021 10:25

X post eye roll


Scrunchy95 · 22/02/2021 12:08

I got back in touch with the dancer on instagram and he has given me the names of 5 other artists and sculptors who have contacted him about the same man. I have messaged them all to say I would like to take this to the police and I am slowly hearing back from them all.

OP posts:

Babdoc · 22/02/2021 16:55

That’s excellent, OP. Quite apart from the chance of arresting the pervert, it will make all of you feel less alone and vulnerable, and give weight and corroboration to your testimony. Good luck with it.


Gcnq · 22/02/2021 20:06

Best wishes, sorry you are going through this.


ArabellaScott · 26/03/2021 20:01

I'd get a really loud whistle.

Good luck with the police. What a creep.


DayBath · 26/03/2021 20:44

Arabella beat me to it, it would be very painful to his ear if you blasted some awful speaker feedback noise or kept a spoon and saucepan by the phone to bash loudly and repeatedly. That would take the shine off his wank session. You can still do that whilst reporting to the police and logging the times of the calls.


HeavenHotel · 11/06/2021 15:08

@Scrunchy95 Hi op how did it all go? Were the police interested?


DaSilvaP · 08/05/2022 19:30

Before going to the police collect as much information as you can, don't delete any email or call log. If you can record all the calls. If the police really put their weight into it there is no "hidden number" or " anonymous account" - 99% of the time it can all be traced.


Mandodari · 09/05/2022 09:59

I would go to the police but I would also get either a very loud whistle or one of those shrieking personal alarms and give the perv a quick blast next time he rings.


WibblyWobblyJane · 09/05/2022 11:04

In addition to what you are doing, and I hate to suggest this, but could you have a male voice leave the outgoing message for your voicemail? Might disrupt his interest in leaving you messages.


DomesticatedZombie · 09/05/2022 11:18

Zombie thread!


Felix125 · 09/05/2022 14:08

Your phone provider can block his number - just because it comes through to you as 'number withheld' they can see it and block it.


Allthegoodnamesarechosen · 11/05/2022 10:36

Next time the heavy breathing starts, shout loudly ‘ insert male name of your choice’ “it’s that bloke wanking again’ . Then put the phone down . Always worked for me.

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