Come and tell me what the point is

[willsurvivethis]

and that it will get better.

Just tired of wave after wave of feelings and memories coming back and the feelings hurtso much - life was easier without them. and the flashbacks make me feel so alone.

I know I need rl support but can't ask. Everyone is too far away.
I'm tired.

I believe God is saying this to you right now.

You are rooted and established in Him.

Thanks Getdown - I struggle to hear Him say anything at all at the moment.

All I know is that I have always believed that I came from a strong warm family. And it has all fallen apart. All a lie. My mum didn't care for me properly and gave me an insecure attachment. She's gone. My wayward brother has disappeared from my life, my Dad and stepmum have their own life.

I'm running out of space for all the things I have to grieve for apart from my virginity at 8 years old, my trust, my joy, my peace, my ability to love and be loved, my ability to be touched without worry and fear, my childhood

Sorry it is all very raw right now and I struggle with the way forward.

I can understand that - you were horribly betrayed as a child.

But there is hope and healing through all this.

You do have a strong warm family - your DH and your DS. And best of all you have a relationship with your father God, who will never ever leave you and cries with you through all your pain.