I'm really finding things difficult at the moment with my mental health. I'm diagnosed with depression and anxiety.
Work is very stressful at the moment and I don't really have any support outside of work.
My mum is a very negative person. She's usually insulting my appearance but today it was my house. She said it smells of piss. No kids or pets who piss on the furniture or floors. I don't know why or how it smells of piss, but there we go. A lot of my poor mental health is caused by my mother, I feel.
After this comment, I decided to end the day short. I was upset. I try and take pride in my house. She refused to end the day short t first, but when she realised I was serious, she went in a right huff and said some stuff. This riled me.
I have no enjoyment in life anymore. Nothing to look forward to and if I ever do anything, I don't enjoy it. Even things I used to enjoy. I have no support. Few friends outside of work. I'm tired. I have a chronic illness too which has flared recently.
I don't see the point in living anymore. I don't have any dependants. I feel some people live go old age, but I'd rather bow out now. Apart from my mother and a few shite relationships, I've had travelled which I've loved and had pets who have fulfilled my life beyond how I could have ever hoped. I don't see a future for me though. I'm good at my job and popular there, but the stress and the constant work put upon us from the top. I simply can't and don't want to have to cope anymore.
I'm not about to kill myself. I just wanted to tell someone. To ask if anyone can understand.