Some advice please

[Mentalhealthhelp2]

I'm not great. I've been through a tough time the last couple of years with my mental health.

I'm finding it difficult to do anything and wondered how people got through this. Please no criticism as I'm looking for some support.

I've currently got agoraphobia and am spending all my time at home. I'm not doing much. I managed to clean the bathroom and kitchen yesterday - thank god. I've got to do the sitting room and bedroom.

I'm not on medication and was discharged from the crisis service. I don't feel depressed but can't get motivated. I'm no longer in therapy as I can't be bothered.

I'm eating well, cooking and ordering food which is good. The Dr said that my recovery would happen gradually so I'm kind of doing what I can.

I'm not really looking after myself, not washing and my hair is all matted. There's no sheets on my bed.

I don't have any support but have disengaged from support services as they were really unhelpful.

Any advice?

My advice if you don't wish to engage in services/therapy/medication right now then it's all down to you and your motivation to not live this way any longer. Cleaning the kitchen and bathroom yesterday is a great first step so well done for that, you should be proud of yourself. Could you describe what a typical day is like for you?
I think making a list of your priorities would be a good start, so is sorting your hair more important than leaving the house? Is getting a hygiene routine sorted more important than sorting the bed sheets? And so on. Once you know what's most important to you then you can work on those things in order.

Thanks.

I'm not really doing anything but watching TV and reading the paper on my phone.

Priorities wise, I'd like to make the bed.

I'm a lot better than I was as before I couldn't really leave the sitting room. Going to the kitchen to make tea was too hard.

This.

I know you say you’re not depressed but the can’t be bothered was very much me when I was depressed. Not looking after yourself sounds like it too. Unless there is another reason you’re not washing and brushing your hair.
Youve made a great first step. Can you choose something to do today??

I know how this feels to some degree and just lose all motivation to function or do much, not sure why it happens. But I do find making lists about what needs to be done a good start as it's out of my head. Just focus on one thing at a time. I went through a really bad spell about going out and challenged myself to walks everyday, 10 mins, use head phones if needed. I am okay now but had to gradually build myself up slowly. Take it easy and be kind to yourself xx

It's hard to describe. I don't really feel down but just can't seem to be able to do anything.

It's not that I'm refusing to engage with services as such. I've been having therapy for years and had to pause it and just haven't restarted. The support services were from a local charity and were really unhelpful.

I just want to be left alone. I'll try making the bed today.

Honestly I think I have ADHD or just constantly feel majorly overwhelmed and just freeze. that's how I'd describe my lack of motivation. I've tried to describe it to the doctor and he just looks at me blank. It's not depression. Once I get going I find I can get some momentum but it's bloody tough to get to that place.

When I say ADHD, I mean the inattentive type.

Aww, honey I'm sorry you feel like this, its horrible. I agree with the previous poster, lists are your friend.
Why not run yourself a bath, you will feel a bit better being clean. Then start a chore a day list.
At least sit by the window for a short period during the day to get some natural light.
Small steps op
I wish you well op 💐 🫂 🤗 x

I’m in a similar position OP and I’m learning that my expectations of myself can be too high for how I’m feeling at the moment. I’m wondering if you are the same - criticising yourself and beating yourself up constantly because you can’t manage seemingly simple tasks such as washing yourself and cleaning the house?
If so, then could you set yourself just one small task to complete each day as you might feel a bit better if you are able to feel satisfied that you achieved that rather than focusing on all the other tasks you think you SHOULD be able to do?
FWIW, you definitely do sound like you are depressed so you need to try to be kinder to yourself (difficult I know!)
Sorry if I have completely missed the mark with these comments. I hope you feeling better soon xx

How are you doing op? Did you manage to make the bed today? If not don't worry there is time this evening or there is always tomorrow. I hope you managed to at least make a list for yourself of what things you'd like to get done for your home and personal care.

Do you have any family or anyone who visits at all?

I haven't yet made the bed but I did pick things up from the sitting room floor and get out the hoover.

My sister is planning to see me, I'm hoping she can help detangle my hair.

I'm wondering if I should phone my GP and ask about going back on medication. Though it didn't really help before.( I've tried loads, before anyone suggests changing it.)

That’s a good step today though. Medication can take a while to get right (and doesn’t work immediately). I’ve also found it most help in conjunction with therapy. CBT for me.

Well done that's really good that you made a start on the sitting room today, every little step adds up.

When is your sister coming over? Hopefully she can take the time to help you with your hair.

How long were you on each medication before? Some people it takes up to 6 months to see a difference and usually needing to increase a few times during those 6 months.

I've been taking medication on and off for the last 20 years. I've given them the usual amount of time, up to six months. I've probably tried about 7-10 different types.

The one I was last prescribed I was on for a few months, I can't remember how many as it was last year. I think it made a little difference and I had to come off it due to having to suddenly move away temporarily.

I'm wondering if I should go on it again. I'm just thinking that the Dr was probably right in that things would improve slowly. She didn't suggest I should go back on the medication. (This is the psychiatrist from the Crisis team before they discharged me).

Hopefully I'll hoover later. My sister is coming on the 14th so hopefully she'll help.

Hope you get the hoovering done. Don’t wait until the 14th. What can you do today to improve things?

With you posting at 2am I take it you're not getting great sleep or have good sleep patterns? That can be contributing to your lack of motivation and energy. Have you ever tried magnesium?

I've actually done quite a bit today. I'm working on sorting out a leak in the ceiling, so I've made a few calls.

I also hoovered and tried to make a Dr appointment but their econsult is down at the moment. So will try again tomorrow.

My sleeping pattern is completely messed up at the moment which is a complete pain. Magnesium won't help as it's not insomnia it's a messed up pattern.

I was fine until a few weeks ago.

Did you manage to do the econsult?

Has your GP or psychiatrist ever suggested a low dose anti-psychotic on top of an AD as that can be used for treatment resistant depression these days?

If your DSis is coming on the 14th, you have a goal to aim for - excellent. Work back and make a list of things you are going to do before she comes? I personally would reengage re meds etc again, it helps you feel like you are doing something positive for yourself. Mindfulness? Not for me but some people love it. A walk outside to the corner shop for something you really fancy (I used to do this for chocolate, lol)? Small steps op. Maybe try and start on your hair before your DSis comes? Then she can help if you can’t get it sorted alone but at least you have tried.

No, the econsult system is down today. I'll try again tomorrow.

No that hasn't been suggested.

I think my goal before she comes is to have the house tidy. I've done most of it now. I've just got the bedroom to do.

Going for a walk is a great idea but I have agoraphobia. I've done quite a few mindfulness courses and used to meditate

I'm going to make a GP appointment and discuss medication with my Dr. I'll see how it goes.