Possible trigger warning…hurting friends dog.
Hello everyone.
At home, it’s myself, husband and our son (8). I have two stepsons (19) & (16)…almost 17.
Sadly, my bonus children’s mum passed away a few months ago. They understandably don’t want to live at their house now with their mums partner. Oldest is staying between their mums partners house (now in his name) and his girlfriend’s house. We have a small two bedroom flat and there isn’t room for them to have their own space so we will be moving to get another two bedrooms to give them their own rooms. Youngest stepson is mostly staying at ours now.
The thing is, I really don’t want to move house and debating whether to move or stay in our current house with our son. My husband would have to move to allow bonus children to have their own space. I don’t think my husband or our families will be happy with me for doing this and think I am being selfish. It’s not as if I’m asking my husband to not move and leave bonus children without anywhere to go, he would be moving with them.
I’m extremely sad about the possibility of not living with my husband if this goes ahead but equally sad about the thought of having to move and let it affect my mental health as I know it will if I do. I don’t think my mental health could cope with moving and living with more people in the house. I feel so torn and confused. I just cry all the time because I don’t know what to do for the best. I am going back and forward trying to work out what to do in my head. I am so confused.
My stepson, (almost 17yo) was staying at his friends house on and off. He hasn’t stayed at his friends house at all in about a week now. He was telling us the other day how his friends dog bit him so he kicked the dog across the room. There were no marks left and no visits to the gp or hospital needed. He was telling us what had happened while laughing about it. It didn’t seem like he felt guilty at all. He was then telling us of another time where I’m assuming it was the same dog who went for his arm so he punched it. Instead of asking his friend/friends parents to remove the dog he apparently punched it twice.
We have a chihuahua who doesn’t seem to like him and growls when he pets him or annoys him. We tell him just to leave the dog alone as it’s a warning. He then comes out with things like, “F off then you little mutt or “well he’s lucky he didn’t get a punch in the p.
My husband just says, “well his friends dog did go for him”but we both know how he is with our dog and doesn’t give me much hope that he wasn’t annoying his friends dog previously.
We were also taking our 8 year old out on his bike to learn how to ride and my husband said maybe if his brother comes along it will encourage him. Stepson says, “I’ll just kick him off it”. I feel he was joking but I just don’t see how anyone should joke about things like that.
Ahh I really don’t know what to do. It’s strange, I just have this gut feeling that I shouldn’t move.
Husband is making an appointment at the GP so they can talk through the situation and get both my stepsons some therapy.
This is also not a new thing since his mum passed away, he has always had this similar type of attitude/behaviour, although not to this extent.
Thank you for taking the time to read this.