I’m so depressed and anxious and feeling like I just can’t carry on.
Have an autistic DS with high needs, non verbal and global developmental delay. He’s 4. He’s started attacking me daily to the point I’ve been crying alone in my bedroom most days. He’s not vicious and he isn’t doing it because he wants to upset me. He finds it funny. And the more I react the more he will hurt me.
Spent today trying to get help and getting nowhere. Managed to get an appointment with a charity to help us with ‘positive behaviours’.
I love him so much and I’m worried he’s this way because of me. I had PND in the first year. What if I caused this?
I’ve gotten myself in an enormous sum of debt that is unmanageable now. I’m working full time hours with my own business but clients don’t pay no matter how many warnings they get and I’m not sleeping. Partner is stay at home dad and carer. I’m trying to pay for everything whilst feeling like a crap mum for working.
I’ve become obese because of comfort eating. Im
so beyond miserable that I don’t recognise myself anymore.
I don’t know what to do. I don’t have any options. I’m sat here crying because I haven’t been able to have a moment to myself in so long and I just feel empty and numb.
If I ended it all now my family might actually be better off.
I just cannot do this anymore