I want to make things clear but I also don’t want to be rude

[Unknownforsaftey]

I’ve been reading messages and I want to make things clear. I am in no way shape or form a good person in it human please remember that, it’s ok to tell me I need help but please remember that with the things I’ve done I do not deserve sympathy or pity, im a schizophrenic non human with anger issues, and please remember I have not been a child for quite some time I don’t like the idea of others caring for some monster like me the only thing I think I deserve is a little bit of a push in the right direction. Thank you for understanding and if you still wish to give me any of that I will kindly remind that I don’t deserve it nothing i went through in life is something i would call traumatic they are simply my punishment.

Are you ok Are you safe?
you deserve to be well

Who is the message for? Do you have support just now?

I am ok and safe I understand I’m not mentally stable but I also do not wish to be seen as weak for something I’ve caused.

The message is just for in general I think it’s best to relize that I need help but I don’t need or deserve pity and sympathy and as of right now my only support is my gf.

I think you really need some compassion focussed therapy to help you to not be so hard on yourself.
keep safe and listen to the replies you get, people care about you, you just need to care about you too.

It’s difficult to feel compassion as I don’t really feel things but I understand what your saying and if I can get help I will try that.

good people sometimes do bad things, it definitely doesn’t make you a bad person, it makes you human! Whatever you have done is done now and in time things will look clearer and not seem as bad as you think they are!

None of us know what kind of person you are.

I am not going to say you deserve compassion and understanding- I have no idea.

What I will say is that you must take responsibility for trying to get well/keep well.

Take your medication, keep engaging in appointments.

Evening.
We're just bobbing on here to say that we're so sorry to hear you're going through this, OP.
We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged to us we like to link to our web-guides, which we hope may be helpful. If you'd like to, please do feel free to take a look at our Mental Health page.
Very best wishes from all at MNHQ

Schizophrenia is a medical condition. It affects the way you think and feel. It isn't a weakness or a failure of any sort. It is just a condition. With the right treatment it is very manageable for a lot of people. The same way many people can live well with diabetes or a heart condition.

I don't know you or what you might have done or been through. But I strongly believe that no one is purely good or bad, we tend to be a mix of both and products of our experiences.

Judging yourself right now, when you aren't feeling stable, probably isn't helpful to you, your view will be clouded. Try and get to a point of stability first and then think about the other stuff, you might find you don't feel the same or you might feel more able to change things if there are things you want to change.