Cheating yet again. I have nowhere now to go to. Had enough.

[YouLookLikeVivieneLeigh]

I have been in a long term relationship of 17 years. Partner owns the house.
We split in the past due to his cheating. It almost killed me emotionally.
We stayed together as I had nowhere to go, and could not afford anywhere to rent and pay bills.
I had no self esteem previously due to mental health illnesses. I warned him that one more time and that was it.
Years on and now I find out he has been meeting women for one off encounters sexually.
I suffer with life long mental health issues, since 15 years old. I am now many years older. I take medication daily. Counselling did not help.
As time goes on I live for my Pets. I do not feel attracted to my partner. We sleep seperately and have done for a few years. I did not trust him obviously.
Having mental health issues has ruined my life. I want to leave but have nowhere to go. There is no one in my life anymore.
I approached the Council but was told mental health or not, I will have to wait. Therefore I will become homeless.
I am so anxious, scared, upset and one minute positive and the next negative. For days, apart from when I sleep, my head feels like it will burst with thoughts of what will I do.
Once my lovely Dog dies then I am taking my life. Life has been nothing but a struggle, with a few good times. Mostly it has been not good.
Has anyone had a similar experience? If so, then please would you share. I do not know what to do.
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Hi OP,
We're just bobbing on here to say that we're so sorry to hear you're going through this, OP.
We hope you don't mind, but when these threads are flagged to us we like to link to our web-guides, which we hope may be helpful. If you'd like to, please do feel free to take a look at our Mental Health page.
Very best wishes from all at MNHQ

Ok. Looked. Thanks. You can remove my post.

Can you not stay with a friend or colleague?
Scrape together enough for a bedsit?
I can't help but feel that a lot of your mental health is probably affected by the situation you are in and a fresh start may give you a better chance to get better?

Living together clearly is suiting you. Can you start to make plans? You don't have to do anything immediately but it's good to sort of look the future and think how you want it to be. Please don't think I'm ending things. You are worth so much more. Do you know anyone that you can talk to to plan a future?

So sorry to hear you are going through such a horrible time.
how old are you? Do you get along ok amicably or is there no friendship left either (obviously before you found out he was cheating again). would he help you pay rent and bills on a flat for 6 months to help you get set up so you can then find a job and get set up and then you can both be rid of each other after that? Or would he not be able to afford to help you/wouldn’t want to help you?

Thanks for replies and suggestions. They are helpful.
I don't have friends or colleagues unfortunately.
We did get on well at times. I lost trust due to the first time he cheated.
Now he has cheated another time, I know that if I don't leave then I will feel like a doormat, and his actions will just leave me feeling more anxious and depressed as they are doing now. He never tells the truth either.
He says he wants me to stay but has done nothing to explain his actions and has not apologised. He just closes off.
I am so scared of starting again alone and even looking at rents makes me realise that I cannot afford to get anywhere and then bills too.
Do people just stay as they cannot afford anywhere?

I am staying for now. Why should I suffer more as in being homeless due to what he did. Looking at the situation for example from outer space, it is nothing. We dont sleep together or have any contact together.
In terms of the horrific things that happen on this planet it is nothing.
Thank you for the replies.