Since we had our dd husbands patience has become zero, he's not well after first 6 mths was diagnosed with a bowel disease. Dd was a terrible sleeper, she has quite a stubborn nature and doesn't listen, she is only 3.5 but this seems to be driving my partner mad!
He got in trouble with SS after slapping her arm when becoming angry with her for kicking the kitchen table, I was quite upset as it was very red & told staff counselling as I didn't now what to think of it. They called SS and sent someone round the same evening, he was quite mortified and was warned, there was no marks so nfa was taken but he has such a short temper. I keep saying she us only 3.5 they don't listen but he thinks she should be able to when it's the 3rd or 4th fine he's repeated himself then he blows up shouting!
This morning they were downstairs whilst I was getting ready and I heard voices raised then my dd came running upstairs crying her eyes out saying he grabbed her under the arm, her arm was red but she was hysterical, I feel tbh deeply upset and shocked and I just wish I had the ability to know exactly what to do myself but I don't!
I'm wks if for advice.
Tbh I think he's really struggled with the adjustment to our new life since dd arrived, I noticed he feels in disarray when the house is a mess and has a habit of cleaning up too much around her, got annoyed she'd left sequins and glitter on her bedroom carpet! I don't care I just want her to be happy and have fun. Our dog is old and keeps having uncontinent issues and that's driving him mad and he's said very bluntly he is never having a dog again! It's so sad, she can't have a cat due to allergies.
His illness may not be helping as it is quite bad, other thing is he is falling asleep on the sofa at 9 so I'm also sat up on my own most nights i feel so lonely and wondering what is becoming of me and my life and do I need to leave because is he going to negatively affect our dds life!
There was also an issue when dd was around 13 mths, things had turned quite badly by this time, he asked me what was wrong with me and I was honest I said you can get up Saturdays for a run early and go out for 2 hrs but never offer me 1 lie in in 13 mths! Or asked me if I'd had time to shower I said I was fed up and felt sick of how things turned out, he said he wished he'd left me in the gutter where I belonged and I was like whatttt?!! Really! I was holding dd and decided that it had to stop there it was too heated wirh her present so I said let me past this isn't going anywhere but he wouldn't let me past and pushed me back in to the room with his thumb in the bridge of my nose! I rang the police and I was adamant that was it, the officer said it was abuse and gave me a contact to call for advice, I never rang it but I stayed hooked things will improve, he's
Not laid a finger on me since but it was after that when he smacked our dd and ss were sent.
I suppose what I'm trying to covey & ask is this a Man i should have left a long time ago and I also want to say If so I am sorry I have let myself down by not being stronger or more intelligent to see this!
He is not a lazy man, he works very hard for the family, not w drinker, gambler or a cheater he says he genuinely wants to do well for us but he gets so angry when dd can't listen or winds hun up to play he gets so annoyed by it and I do not know wth was wrong with him that day he pushed me!
I think he wants to be the best dad he can be but same time has major anger issues
Sorry this was long it's so hard to put this over but I have wondered a long time if I should've left a few yrs ago and he has done other things that feel inconsiderate like last 2 mothers days, LY he collected us after I chaperoned 20 kids for 3 hrs whilst he had the morn to himself, I was so hungry when I came out and said I need food quick, he said we're going to this local tea room I thought hmm that's strange he has bkd a table for MDay but I was covered in dust from kneeling on the floor and said a heads up wouldve been helpful as I aren't dressed to go out, he then said can I just ring them to check they've got a table free?!! So he hasn't bkd one was jjst hoping we'd get in but it's so popular there was no way plus I felt underdressed and said I'm sorry but he had all morning to ring them what had he been doing! In fact he'd had a year to sort it in adv! He was vile all the way home, awkward, funny and my day was ruined!
This yr I just bkd my own lunch as I just wanted make sure dd & myself weren't stuck in so we all went, it was fine, but coming bk he lost the plot at me saying I was inconsiderate to the cost he paid for the car as my daughter didn't like a sweet I passed her and needed to spit it out quickly, it was soaked so chucked it at the centre console toward a wrapper, really peed him off, he just doesn't seem to have any soh at all, mr overly serious all the time it seems to be his nature!
He has got worse since dd arrived, I wonder what it'd be like to not have this, for dd to enjoy her room whatever mess she makes knowing he age and she's not doing it on purpose to annoy anyone, for her to have a pets
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