Hi. I don’t want to be here any more. I’m stuck in this life, in this situation without an out.
my relationship is on the rocks, I don’t want it. I’m financially dependent on him. I’ve got no where else to go at all. I gave up my property back at the very beginning on the first lockdown due to being pregnant ( we were happy in our relationship but also I had no plans on moving to his full time) but it made sense due to lock down. It’s nothing he’s done really and he’s not abusive or controlling.
I have 3 children 2 from previous partner.. one who sadly passed away during my pregnancy 11 years ago and a 8 year old girl.
( as well as a 2yo DD with my current partner)
my children are the only reason I’m still alive. I don’t want to be alive but I can’t die because I can’t stand the thought of hurting them/ them hurting. For this reason I regret having my girls. I truly believe and wish I should have died after the loss of my son (after my hemorrhage)
I don’t know what I’m expecting from writing this. I don’t expect a response.
im stuck and feeling incredibly helpless and just needed to say this