sertraline for pnd

[poochie9]

Hi all. Looking for some reassurance I guess.
my little girl is 8 weeks old. She was and is so wanted and I couldn’t wait to meet her and become her mummy.
unfortunately- it hasn’t been what I’d expected it to be and I’ve been really ill and suffering with severe postnatal depression. I feel sad and hopeless and keep questioning whether I love my daughter - because how could I if I feel sad all the time (this pains me so much to say) - I haven’t felt like myself since she was born, we had a difficult birth and my mental health has declined pretty much everyday since. I have obsessive thoughts everyday, questioning why I don’t feel things I should be feeling. Guilt for not being happy. This is all I’ve ever wanted and yet I’ve never ever felt so low and hopeless in my life. I am caring for our baby girl and my partner is amazing and has been so supportive but I literally feel like a shell of a person. I started on sertraline two weeks ago, spend a week on 25 and increased to 50mg on Monday this week. Has anyone else experienced anything similar and does it get better? Everyone keeps saying it will but I feel so low right now I worry about how it’s going to ever get better and if I’ll be able to enjoy my baby and our new family life together. Honestly breaking my heart feeling like this and feeling like I’m ruining it for my little girl, she deserves more and so does my boyfriend. I had a few days this week when I upped the dose where I felt a little better and then yesterday I dived again and now feel worse than before. I don’t know what else to do the guilt is killing me

Hey OP, I’ve been on sertraline for a few months and it really helped me. I feel like myself again and am able to enjoy being a mummy in a way I never thought I could when my PND was bad. It took about a month for the medication to fully settle things so do persevere x

It really really helped me. It does take time though and can make you feel a little worse before you feel better. Keep in touch with your GP if you need to.

It is a tough gig motherhood, even without the PND. One hour at a time.

Here is a link to the PANDAS website which I found helpful:

pandasfoundation.org.uk/

Thank you for replying. Can I ask how much you both take? I’m currently taking 50mg and hoping this will be enough x

Hi there Op, sorry to hear that you're having a difficult time. We've now moved this over to our Mental Health topic, where we're sure you'll get lots of advice and support. Take care.

@poochie9 50mg too. For me it’s been enough but if you do find after a month or so you don’t feel better then your GP can look at the dose. Do you have another check in scheduled in to review how you are getting on on the medication?

What your feeling is very common. I felt that way when mine was born and they were very much wanted. It’s just the dreaded hormones and PND talking. I was convinced that I wouldn’t be a good mother and that I had some how ruined my marriage even though my husband was over the moon to be a new father. I also had Postpartum OCD which was pretty horrible. I was obsessively checking my baby for illnesses, whether or not they were breathing and when they cried I was convinced they were dying. It was such a horrible feeling. They were born early and they were very small which made it harder and more scary. I wish I could say it was the baby that kept me up all night but it was me obsessively checking on her to make sure she was okay.

It did get better though. Once I got on my medication I slowly adjusted to parenthood and started feeling a bit more like myself.

@FireChild I’m sorry that you also went through this and with OCD also - it must’ve been a very difficult time. Everyone seems to say that the medication really helped them but I’m so scared it’s not going to work for me. It will be two weeks on Monday since I started taking 50mg and I have definitely had some better days. However. When I dip, I dip really really low and feel like I’m back to square one. Last night I was really scared at the thoughts I was having. I found myself thinking about how my partner and little girl would cope without me, how it would affect them. I’ve never thought anything like that before and it’s definitely not something I want to do, I think it was an intrusive thought but it scared me so much that I was even capable of thinking something like that.
I just want to feel better. 😣

ive got a phone appointment in 3 weeks with my gp - however I haven’t found her to be the most helpful so far and I don’t really have much confidence in her helping me

See a different gp

Night times where more difficult for me. I had thoughts of running away because I thought my partner and baby would be better off without me. I feel silly and childish saying that but it’s true. If you still feel bad my social worker said you can go on much higher doses. So if you still feel bad just ask if you can try a higher dosage assuming you’re not having any hard side effects to the medication.