Emetophobia - terrified of this sickness bug

[nellyraggbagg]

This sounds so stupid, but I'm completely terrified of the children (not to mention DH and me) catching this Norovirus that's doing the rounds. I've been emetophobic for as long as I can remember, and it has become even worse since having children. Every time they open their mouths, I'm terrified they're going to say they feel sick. When I go to bed at night, my last waking thought is: "Oh my God, what if they're sick in the night?" My DH is working away a lot at the moment, which makes matters even worse (he is good at dealing with sick, thank goodness!!) I have dealt with both children being sick (I have found that manic cleaning helps very slightly to take my mind off the blind panic), but am rigid with fear following newspaper reports of this current bug. How will I pick DS up from school if DD and/or I get it? My Mum is miles away, unfortunately. And what if DH gets it? I don't know how I'd cope if he were sick. Please, please help, someone - even if just by saying that I'm not the only person who feels like this!

Hi all! Hope everyone is ok.
Notalone, yes i am under Rotherham health care, not impressed!! I did get my anti emets in the end but she totally didn't understand why i NEEDED them. I will probably try and see another Dr but i am new to this practice as have just moved here so i don't know who the good Drs are...that's if there are any!! It's trial and error at the mo. I'm mad really because at my last practice I had an excellent Dr. Oh well!
I agree this thread is an absolute godsend and it's so good to know there are others out there just the same as me. That in itself helps me cope better.xx

Mine was the same Wiggleit. I moved house - only up the road but my old sympathetic GP could no longer treat me so I have been forced to go to some godawful medical centre up the road. I first went to see my new GP 6 months after moving and we got off to a bad start when he shut the door in my face as I was following him into his treatment room. He then declared that he didn't have my medical records and that it was MY fault as I hadn't chased them. I told him I thought that was what they did and he didn't answer me. I then had to explain about my phobia all over again which I found bad enough the first time with a nice GP. He kept his eyes shut the whole time I was talking then told me it was all in my head and he couldn't prescribe the anti emets as he had no record of me being prescribed them before and I could just be trying it on to get hold of them for other reasons (not sure what those reasons would be but hey). I was practically in tears and on the point of having to beg for them before he reluctantly prescribed them to me while giving me a look as though it was methadone or something I wanted. I hate going there now but there are no other doctors available. If you can Wiggelit try to see another GP - its so important to feel that your GP is listening and understanding of your feelings. There is nothing worse than being made to feel like a mad, addicted to ani emets addict type person.

Notalone.. am with you on the rude Dr thing. The first time i went to this new surgery i had the most rude Dr, he never made eye contact with me the whole time i was there and also made me feel it was my fault he hadn't got my notes. Made a note of his name and vowed never to see him again no matter how desperate! So i thought i'd try a woman Dr, she is ok i suppose, but when i mentioned the v thing she just didn't get it at all. Think i will try another Dr but am losing faith in this practice because everyone seems so miserable..especially the receptionists, but know they have a reputation for being awkward anyway!!! Don't know about you but find the whole phobia thing embarrassing enough without being met with ignorant Drs.xx

Tell me about it Wiggelit - and it takes so much courage to go there and explain too. Keep trying if you can bring yourself to because there are some fab GP's too. I had a lovely one before I moved - when I told her she looked at me with such sympathy I wanted to burst into tears there and then and she actually acknowledged how hard day to day life must be with a phobia such as this. Bless her - she restored my faith in GP's. Well up until now anyway

Your old GP didn't have a surname beginning with a K did he? He sounds suspiciously like the one I have now.

Also... my dd has had her friend over for tea tonight, and when thr mum came to pick dc up she mentioned that she(the mum) had had 'a right bad stomach in the night' and still felt dodgy! This was after i'd made her a drink and we were sat chatting...couldn't wait for her to up n leave!! Now i'm worried that she has brought a bug in to our house, the thing is i am made up with cold and know my immune system under pressure as it is.. feel bit anxious about catching something from her..aarrgh!!! Any reassuring words anyone? She was here about 20mins. Have since dettoxed where she was etc... I'm a freak arn't i? My mil thinks i am bacause of this phobia. Maybe she's right? any normal person wouldn't bat an eyelid would they? xx

Wiggleit - here are some reassuring words (I hope!!) It's possible that her bad stomach didn't involve v (or even d), and that she just had stomach ache, or that she'd eaten something dodgy. It's even possible that she was exaggerating... And even if she did have a tummy bug, it's really unlikely that you'd get it just from being in the same room as her, especially if you've scrubbed where she was sitting!! I think you'd have to come into direct contact with her, so my guess is that you'll be fine. (I should add that if I were in your shoes, I'd be worrying too - but I hope someone else who understood the problem would tell me that I needn't worry!!)

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you...

It's a real shame to read about unsympathetic GPs. I have yet to try mine for CBT, so I hope I get a better reception. I do know to avoid various ones at our practice (like the one who told me I was imagining migraines during pregnancy. I ask you!!)

Sorry Wiggleit - missed your post.

There could be a whole host of reasons why she had a tummy ache. IBS is really really common and that causes tummy ache (I get it a lot) or she may have Auntie Flo come to stay and been too shy / embarassed to actually say period so she said tummy ache instead. I would try to reason that if she felt sick she would say she felt sick so I think you should be fine. I hope you are fine tonight and don't worry too much.

Me and my friends used to laugh at a girls family at school when she confessed her mum kept a special "lurgy" cup for visitors so her family didn't catch anything. At the time I thought she must be mental but now I can totally understand. Have you thought about doing this? I haven't done this yet but would definitely consider it. My god, I am turning into the sort of person I used to think was a freak

Thanx nelly and notalone for your words of support. Said friend has also been around tonight to drop me a birthday card n prezzi off. She had d apparently but no v, but in her words she felt shocking that night and last night too!!! aarghh!! Trying not to let it affect me but it is still in the back of my mind, well, the front actually! It was funny coz i gave her a drink of fruit juice lastnight and she said she couldn't drink it all so told me not to throw it away but to finish it off for her....like hell!!!! it went straight down the sink as soon as she'd gone! Don't share drinks or food with anyone.. too risky! The lurgy cup is a good idea, will do that. I have already been labelled a freak by dear mil so nothing to lose really!! How is everyone btw? xx

I'm absolutely sure you'll be fine, wiggelit. You've not shared towels or anything with her, so there's very little risk. No way would I have finished off her drink either!!

My DH has d today, and has a very uncomfortable tummy (he's nothing to eat, which is virtually unheard of for him) so I am in a tizzy. DD also had funny poo!

Good evening ladies, hope you are all ok. Love the idea of a lurgy cup! If I did that my family would think I've turned into some kind of nutcase.

I recently posted to tell you about analytical hypnotherapy which has a very good success record for dealing with phobias and anxiety. I went to see someone reputable yesterday and I've agreed to give it a try. Have got to do something as I can't continue like this. Emet is a very tiring phobia as you can never escape it, unlike other phobias such as flying.
I will let you all know how I get on. Will start my course of treatment in two weeks time.

Out of curiosity how do feel about cruise holidays?, only my parents keeps suggesting we go on one. The thought of it sends me into a panic. A cruise ship is the last place you would find me incase of an outbreak of Noro - I would jump overboard rather than risk catching it. Another dread of mine is a barbeque - all that undercooked meat just waiting to make you ill!

Was meant to meet a friend and dcs yesterday for a playdate, however we decided later in the week would be easier. Spoke to her today to discover her dc has been sick all morning. What a relief we didn't meet up yesterday as I would be panic stricken by now. Poor friend - she's managed it all much better than I would.

BB - Wish you luck in your trying for another baby. I remember too well that hopeful feeling you get each month only to be met with disappointment. Have you tried one of those predictor tests. My friend used one of those after trying for a while and it worked for her.

Hope you all have a quite night. x

Hi all, hope everyone is OK. Funnybunny that treatment sounds very interesting - you'll have to let us know how it goes.

I would definitely not go on a cruise during 'noro' season, but probably would in summer. Not with the DC's though as I'd be too worried about them getting seasick. I'm already panicking about a ferry crossing to the Isle of Whyte! Mind you if someone offered me a luxury cruise to somewhere exotic, I'd probably accept, whatever the time of year!

Nelly, My DP had D & stomach cramps on Wednesday. I had a slight gurgly tummy yesterday, so we've definitley got some kind of bug. I'm just praying we don't pass it on to the dc's.

Let's hope this is a non-v bug that's doing the rounds!

Funnybunny - do let us know what happens with the therapy! It would be so fab it it worked...

I'm afraid I'd have to say no to a cruise - would be too scared of seasickness, tragically enough.

I had to stop mid-post last night as DH came in, and he doesn't know that I post on here. He already thinks I'm a complete nutter as it is!! His d seems better today, so with a bit of luck it was one of the many dodgy things that he ate...

Annoyingdevil - I hope your DP is better soon, and that you stop gurgling. It does sound like a non-v bug, thank goodness!

Crikey. I didn't realise there were so many other mums who were terrified of throwing up. Have suffered from this for years and am in education too so am vomited on regularly. The best thing I ever did was have hypnosis. I can cope well with other people vomiting now although still scream the house down if it's me. (Grin)

Welcome Dalex! You are very brave - I would be too scared of bugs to work with children (more's the pity - I love small children). How fascinating that you can cope with other people's v. This sounds like a good advert for hypnosis!

Welcome Dalex, I am so glad to hear a positive outcome of hypnosis. I too am about to embark on a course. Even if I can get to the stage where I can deal with my children vomiting I will be delighted. Anything else would be a bonus.

Nelly, you are so right. I could never work with children as I would be too scared. Just like I could never be a nurse or teacher. I don't know if you would agree but I find this phobia really does impose limits on your life and the choices I make.

I am a bit nervous about this form of hypnosis as I have never done anything like this before so I will keep you all posted. Wish me luck!

Hi Everyone. Am ok but am starting full time work no Monday so am dreading it!!! (been part time for past few years)

Another one saying a definite No No No to a cruise. For me its the fact you would not be able to get away from it if the worst came to the worst. Cruise ships are notorious for harbouring noro too. Eeeek!!!

Welcome Dalex!! Am another one who is terrified of being the affected party. You are in the right place here - we all have this horrid phobia so keep posting.

Am keeping everything crossed Annoyingdevil I think if it were going to cause V that would probably have been the first symptom so I reckon you will all be fine.

Hope everyone is having a good, trouble free weekend xx

Hi everyone. Funnybunny, take someone with you. I took my husband who was very sceptical but he organised it all for me. Did go to a psychiatrist for a few sessions when at uni. The sessions began with listening to the sounds of someone retching, then smelling vomit, then the psych. pretendint o vomit with rice pudding and minestrone soup(!) to watchig a video. The final stage involved taking one of those tablets which makes you sick at which point I walked out. This is not like any other phobia, like spiders when you can confront your fear.
It does effect your whole life and makes you anal about keeping your kids clean etc. Talking to other people realy helps and having someone who understands helps too. There is a group whereby you can phone other emetophobes at any time of night when you're feeling sick. Sounds daft but god it's useful.

Hi everyone! Hope you are all well. Welcome Dalex, I'm also pretty new to this site too but boy am i pleased to have stumbled across it. I was interested in what you said about the group you can phone at any time of the night if you are feeling sick...what a godsend that must be? Any chance of letting us other emets know how to find out about that? My biggest fear is waking up in the middle of the night feeling sick, somehow feeling sick in the night is worse than in the day although either is terrifying! I would rather die than be sick, no-one believes me when i say that but that is how i truly feel. Don't know how you manage to work with kids, very brave of you! I struggle to actually enter the school itself! Find parent's evenings and especially school plays hard to attend, although i do.
Funnybunny - Good luck with the analytical hypnotherapy when you start it in a couple of weeks. I've not heard of that so would be really interested to know what it entails and how you find it. keep us posted. As for the cruise thing..no way would i ever go on a cruise! Most of the times i've heard about noro it's been on cruises, where would you go??!! No escape! It doesn't seem to matter what time of year it is either. But once you are on that ship, there's no getting off! I too would want to jump overboard and i'm afraid of deep water too but rather that than v!
Annoyingdevil - How's things in your household after your scare? Hope all is ok now. Was thinking of you! I haven't had time to go on to actually write anything but i do read the messages.
Notalone - Congrats on your full-time post! You'll be fine. Be thinking of you on Monday.
BB - Hope you are having a fab weekend away. Catch up with you next week.
Anyway, i've gone on enough, hope everyone is ok. Plus, happy birthday to me! it was my birthday yesterday. One of my neighbour's came round with a card and said '' 21 again? '' I replied '' of course! '' DD butted in, '' no she's not, she's 38! '' Kids, don't ya just love em! Bless, I've been telling her it's naughty to lie but that is taking things a bit too far in my book! Sees yas later! xx

Wiggleit, you're right. If you feel sick during the day you can cope. I think it's because there are lots of people around.At night it is so different. depsite having a snoring husband next to me, I just want someone to talk and say all will be fine. Plus I think it is the association of dark with the childhood fear of being sick. I remember a kid coming for a taster day at school when I was 5. She drank a bottle of milk at break and was sick. Of course I didn't realise she was on a taster and thought she had died. The association with being sick and dying has never left me nor have I ever drunk milk! As you said, I'd rather die thn be sick

Hi Dalex, funny you mention the milk thing too, i have never been able to drink milk, ever,even as a child, and i can't watch people drink milk either. Weird huh? (yes i am!) I hate night time simply because of the sick thing. I will watch tv til all hours just not to have to sleep and wake up feeling ill, can sleep great in the day! If i didn't have to work and also let my poor hubby get some sleep then think i would be nocturnal,i hate the darkness. Like it in the summer when it starts getting light early. This phobia affects so many areas of your life, don't you think? My husband is very good with me though, i am lucky. The only thing he gets at me about is having the tv on in bed when he wants to sleep, so i end up turning it off for his sake but hate laying there in the dark. Plus if i do feel sick i like to be left on my own bacause i'm embarrassed about how i am. I want him there in the house but not in the same room as me. The more i write stuff down on here the more i think i really am wierd!! xx

Hi Wiggleit, if you're weird then so am I. DH gets fed up of TV being on all night. Rather than be sick, I will watch TV all night and then get up to kids and work the next day feeling dreadful but better dreadful than being sick in dark and alone. Dh good. Once lived with man who gave me salt water to get it over with as a trick as could not put up with my phobia. I find if I have cold, light and noise i.e. TV I can manage. How about you?

Funny you should talk about milk, I can't stand it either. Maybe - on a subconscious level - it reminds me of vomiting as a child/baby (I can remember it happening at school when I was forced to drink some!)

Our tummy bug was not a 'v' one. thank goodness. The dc's have not succumbed (touches every piece of wood in a ten mile radius!). I do appreciate that what could be just 'D' for us, could be 'V' for them IYSWIM.

Totally get what you mean about feeling sick at night. When I had gastroenteritis (20th Dec 2006) I stayed awake the entire night.

Dalex, how awful was that man to give you salt water!! That's terrible. Before i got married i had a couple of boyfriend's who didn't 'get' my phobia but none were ever cruel about it. I manage much the same as you really, just like to have some background noise and light lke you say, but still lay there dead still till it passes!! I always have a drink at the side of the bed too. Plus my anti-emet drugs!!
Annoyingdevil, glad yours not a 'v' bug. Think my friend had that 'd' bug the other day, who i mentioned. I've been on alert ever since had contact with her, but been surprisingly brave for me, eating wise. Had an indian takeaway with friends last night (although i did opt for the vegi version!)xx

Glad someone else only eats vegetarian curry. Last time I ate tikka misala spent the whole night retching in the garden in my pants. What a pleasant image