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When you don’t want to live

1 reply

EverestsSnowPlow · 10/12/2021 14:21

What can you do?

Depression for nearly 25 years. Live in a very isolated community where I don’t speak the language and have maybe 1 friend who is going to be away all winter. All friends and family are back home in the UK. The snow has started and I now face 6 or 7 months more or less stuck indoors due to subzero temps. I go out whenever I can, I attend intensive language lessons every day, I try to find things to look forward to. But once again I’m struggling to keep myself alive. The difference is that I now have 2 small children (one of whom absolutely hates me and it breaks my heart) so there is no choice but to keep going. But I really, really don’t want to.

Antidepressants and therapy have not worked so far. Neither has exercise, meditation, healthy diet, etc. I fear that not everyone can be helped and that I appear to be one of those people.

I really don’t know what to do.

Thanks if you read this far.

YetAnotherBeckyMumsnet · 11/12/2021 10:30

Hello @EverestsSnowPlow - we're so very sorry that you're feeling this way. We usually link to our mental health resources but as you're not in the UK, we'd advise you to speak to your doctor first about how you're feeling - you don't have to suffer this alone.

In case it's of help, you can also take a look at our Mental Health webguide. You can also go to the Samaritans website or email them on [email protected]. Support from other Mumsnetters is great and we really hope you will be able to take some comfort from your fellow posters, but as other MNers will tell you, it's really a good idea to seek real-life help and support as well.

Very best wishes from MNHQ.

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